My parents are getting divorced, and I'm so scared?

Question

Please take some time to answer, any help will be appreciated.

I'm 16 and I have an 11 year old sister. My dad makes a lot of money, but is too cheap to give my mother any who makes less than him. My mom is the best mother in the world, and spends NONE of her money on herself, only on my sister and me and food. He plays in a band on the side (although he has a high-end job) with really gross people who are bad news and this could jepordize his job. My mom no longer trusts him and neither do I bc he has a passive-agressive attitude and basically only cares for himself. I love my dad so much, but this has gotten to be terrible. My mom got cancer last summer and finished her treatment in January, he was not supportive. Anyway, he left on Monday night and went to stay with his sister who is (I'm not kidding) absolutely crazy and she's a (I HATE to say this) w***e and does illegal things. My mom got a restraining order against him until next week and today he came to get his things with the police. He ook his clothes and selfishly took his motorcycle not even thinking of giving his kids any money even when he left a few nights ago. Now they are on the verge of divorce, and next week they will be in court trying to figure out what they are doing.

I knew this was coming, I just never thought it would. I'm so scared and I cry every day 100 times a day. Please help me, and give me any advice you have whether it's from experience or if you just care. Thank you so much! <3

Answer 1

Your story put a tear in my eye. You certainly sound like a very mature young lady and your eyes are wide open to what is happening. I&#039;m sorry to hear about your mom, and I hope she is on her way to a healthy recovery and a long long life a head of her.  Just remember to love your parents and your sister. What is happening with your parents is not your or your sisters fault. Just love them and if it comes down to choosing who to live with, sounds like your mom has both your best interests at heart, and thats what counts. You can still love your dad, but live with your mom who obviously adores you girls.Best  of luck little lamb.....♥♥♥

Answer 2

My parents got divorced when I was 23, my sister was 13.  

I was mostly scared for my sister, than I was of what would happen to all of us girls.  My dad also was (still is) more well-off than my mother.

In the end, I noticed that both my parents are happier and more at peace than when they were together.  It will take time for you to see the good come out of this awful situation.

It&#039;s true that the ones that suffer are the kids, because - even I at 23 didn&#039;t understand why my parents couldn&#039;t have worked things out.

I&#039;m married now, and I can&#039;t think how this beginning (which I think is very common in all marriages) could end up in a bitter divorce.  I don&#039;t think anyone that gets married, intentionally plans for a divorce.  Things go wrong, beyond mending, and the only solution is to split up.

It&#039;ll be for the best, even though you can&#039;t see it now...this will seem like so long ago and you will be able to renew your relationships in a more mature way with each of your parents.

It is a sad thing to see your family change before your eyes, and you have no control over it.  Hug your mom and your sister when you can, let them know how much you love them, and let them hug you and show you how much they care about you too.  It&#039;s important to at least keep the girls together, because usually the courts lean towards this arrangement for the custody battle.

It&#039;s okay to cry, and it&#039;s okay to feel sad.  But it&#039;s not for forever, this will pass.