My parents don't even let me lock my door!

Question

I know this sounds dumb, but sometimes I just wanna lock my door and get away from everyone. Sometimes I like sleeping at night with the door closed, but when I wake up, I find the door open. One time in my older house, I woke up to my dad banging on the door telling me to open the door. Now it's getting ridiculous. My mom works the night shift and she came home and slept around 8 am she woke up at about 10:30, my door was locked, I was just laying around, and I hear keys jangling and she opens my door.

How in h**l am I supposed to get my privacy?

Every time I demand that I need privacy my parents just disregard what I say and claim I don't need privacy.

What should I do?

Answer 1

you must have done something for them to be like this..

if you feel this is so unfair why dont you go and talk to them about it??

Answer 2

I don't understand why they would be doing this, Unless you've given them a reason to worry, maybe they are paranoid because it sure sounds weird, sit down with them and talk to them about it, every one needs their own space where they can be alone.

Answer 3

As others have said, the people who pay the bills in your household (presumably your parents) get to make the rules.

You do not have the right to demand anything. You may calmly explain your feelings to see if you can make some headway, but your parents are well within their rights to maintain an open door rule.

Answer 4

It's not your house.  Get over it.

Parents open doors for several reasons -

1.  To check on you.

2.  To hear you if you should call out in the night (like somebody has broken into your room through a window) or you're sick

3.  It helps the AC/Heating system work more effectively

4.  In case of fire - they can get to you in a hurry

5.  And to know if you're doing something you shouldn't be doing.

Believe it or not, parents do have your best interests in mind.  When you're 18, you're on your own.

Answer 5

Dude, it's okay. There's other places you can go to blow off steam. When we moved in this month to our new house my parents didn't think I need a door. Still ain't got one. So what I do is that I go out to the town center.

Answer 6

You get privacy when you turn 18 and get out of their house. They own the house and they make the rules. Why do you need the door locked anyway? Are you doing something that you don't want them to see? If you need privacy, go to the bathroom.  

Answer 7

It reallly depends on your age?? More info please.

Answer 8

Alas, it's their house and you must abide by their rules. They don't have to allow you privacy. Why not discuss with them why they have an issue with your door being closed? If you could get them to understand when the door is closed you'd appreciate them knocking and not opening the door until invited in, then there'd be no need to lock it. To them, locking the door implies something is going on that shouldn't, and it likely affects their trust in you.

Answer 9

so,  why don't you just ask why it is so important to have your door open?  It is amazing what can happen by actually trying to communicate and gain some understanding.  I would try and have a genuine conversation without getting emotional about things.   Demanding doesn't fly with parents!!!   If you can remain calm and not make any accusations, you may be able to convince your parents to leave the door closed.  Start out by saying "Mom Dad, can I talk with you a minute?"  Then say something like, I know you don't like me to have my door closed, and I was wondering why that is?  If they won't give you a good answer, just the old "we just want it open" routine, don't settle for that.  Give them some suggestions such as  "do you not trust me?"....(hopefully you have not been doing things to  give them reason not to trust you).  "have I done something to cause you to feel that the door needs to be open?"  Try to get them to give you some reasons.  Then, give them some reasons why you like the door shut.  Ask them if they sometimes want or need some privacey, just time a lone.  Explain that is all you are after, it's not that you are trying to hide anything, but you just like to have an area that you feel is really yours.  Having the door closed helps you to relax and get away from the world a little.

  I can understand not wanting your door locked.  None of my kids bedroom doors have locks on them.  Don't lock the door, that says I'm tyring to hide something.

Answer 10

You need to lay it down straight. Say you NEED your Privacy! And you have a right to it! I can understand them not wanting your door locked/shut if you have guys over. But for changing yes.

Also, they probably don't want it locked while your sleeping, because if there was a fire, they'd be afraid you'd be trapped. I know it sounds dumb, but lots of parents freak out about that stuff. So maybe that's what's bothering them

Answer 11

sound   help  you

Answer 12

I agree you ar entitled to privacy and your parents should respect this and knock on your door before entering. Rather than demanding in a loud angry voice try discussing it reasonablywith your parents explaining your need to be alone sometimes and the fact that you are uncomfortable that they may walk in and find you naked or something now you are growing up. Expalin that they would not like it if you walked into their room unnanounced at any time. If you talk to them in an adult way there is more chance of them treating you like one.

I dont think you should be locking yourself in though. It should not be necessary during the day and at night could be dangerous if there was a fire and it delayed you exiting your room or prevented someone else from getting access if you were ill.