My partner just died can i still try to contact his birth parents as he was adopted? he was 25?

Question

my live in partner of a year has recently died and his adoptive parents are keeping the adoption a big secret so no one knows, however my boyfriends birth mother had wanted to contact him and he had alsways wanted to find his real family, i want to know if i have any right to contact her and let her know of his death and of what a beatiful person he is. i want to carry out that dream for him. He was 25.

Answer 1

i am so sorry for your loss,,if that is what he wonted go and find them am let them know... and tell them what a beautiful person he was.

Answer 2

I am so sorry for your loss.  What a young age, 25?

Under different circumstances I would state emphatically NO, regarding contacting the woman that gave birth to your partner.

Under these circumstances I think you have a heart of gold and want to share love with this woman.   I do not know how much of a good person he was, but you, my friend are one of the nicest I have met on Answers.

Yes, contact her.  You are doing it for a positive reason.

Peace and love,

Mother and grandmother.

Answer 3

well i see why you should not tell her,  but too you may want to ask his adoptive mother first, since that is basically his mom

Answer 4

I would definitely continue on and contact his family!!! My 19 year old brother was adopted and he actually is still in contact with all of his sisters and his brother, his grandmother, aunts, and uncles. Now, he has seen his birth mother a few times, since he's been adopted but he doesn't like to be around her because of everything that has happened because of her. But yes, GO FOR IT!!!!

Answer 5

i am so so sorry for your loss, and yes - i would suggest you track them down and do what is right.

tell them how wonderful he was, is and always will be...

good luck

Answer 6

First of all , I am very sorry for your loss- and if you believe that it is what he would have wanted you to do - go and find his birth family and tell them-  I think it is beautiful that you want to fulfill his dream of finding his birth parents. I will pray that the reunion will be sweet, even with the sad news you have= God bless and hang in there.

Answer 7

I am sorry for your loss.  If your partner would want you to contact his birth mother, you should certainly do so.  If I had a child out in the world that I had given up for adoption I would certainly want to know that he had passed, and also more details about him and the life that he led.

I'm tearing up typing this, my children are grown up, and I know they are fine, bless the Lord; but just the thought of anything bad happening gets me very upset.

Your partner sounds like he was a tremendous person and will be in your heart forever.  God bless you and hold you close during this difficult time.

Answer 8

I am so sorry for your loss.  I think it would be a wonderful thing for you to do to carry his dream for him and I'm sure his mother would want to know.

You and his mother can find some wonderful support from wonderful people in this situation here:

http://foundandlostsupport.com/home.html

Take care of you.

ETA:   You do not need the permission of his adoptive mother.  He was a grown adult and you are just following his wishes pppffffft to needing 'mommy's permission' geeez

Answer 9

i know i would. i hate to tell you to keep a secret, but maybe the adoptive family doesnt need to know.

i think it is wonderful that you want to do this for him. its going to be hard, but if you believe this is what he would have wanted than you should do it. he would be proud of you.

i am truly sorry for your loss. i cant even begin to pretend i know how you feel.

maybe taking care of some of his 'unfinished business' will help you along the way also.

best of luck to you

Answer 10

if you want to then go ahead but perhaps keep it your secret. If the adoptive parents wanted it to be a secret then let them has it that way.

Answer 11

yes do it very quietly an dlet her know i am sure she would wan tot know. take care.

Answer 12

OMG THIS IS THE MOST SADDEST QUESTION EVER SORRY FOR UR LOSS

Answer 13

I am SO sorry for your loss.

Yes, I think you should do whatever you can to let his natural mother know that he has dies, and information about him.

Please do what you can to find her.  And thank  you for doing the right thing.

Answer 14

If he would want you to do so, then do so. I'm really sorry for your loss.