My personality isolates me from the rest of the world?

Question

I have just recently began working at an office job. I love the work I do, however I don't exactly like the people I work with. Or they don't like me I should say.

Pretty much my whole life I have had a difficult time getting along with people. It's just, I never know what to say, or what I have to say people don't find important, and when I do talk my mind goes way ahead of my mouth and I stutter.

My whole life I have spent "running" from job to job or activity to activity, always thinking that the next time will be different, and it never is. I always end up feeling isolated, trapped by my own thoughts.

I have gone to psychologists for years, and explained to them time after time of my issues with people. I don't know if I trust medications, I just think the world has a pill for everything.

I just don't know what to do, and I have become so frusterated and tired. I get headaches all the time, and I am angry with myself. If anyone has any advice, that would be great.

Answer 1

I wouldn't say that your personality isolates you, since I'm pretty similar to you in that I don't get along with the majority of the people. It just takes longer for you to find someone that you really click with or accepting your colleagues and their "flaws". When I moved to a new school, it took me till almost the end of the school year till I got along with my class mates.   I had many breakdowns and rantings on the way but eventually saw that they weren't too bad.

  Maybe  if you understand yourself better you can figure why you feel this way?

http://www.kisa.ca/personality/

http://typelogic.com/istj.html

Hope you feel better!

Answer 2

I actually somewhat understand...  I sometimes find myself more content in my solitude then I do in large groups of people. Is that how it is for you?

Answer 3

First off the problem probably isn't personality but socialization.  That is to say, you weren't born that way, you just didn't learn the skills you need to cope in relationships.

The first thing you need to relax because you have a viccious circle going on there.  1) you feel awkward around people 2) people pick up on this and it is awkward 3) they reject you 4) you fear that other people will reject you too 5) back to 1.  The easiest place to stop the circle is where you have control (1).

Probably people don't hate you.  Hate takes a lot of energy.  They probably are just indifferent.  So you can earn their respect and get them to like you.

Another thing you need to do is train yourself to focus on what is being said.  In other words put as much of your attention as possible on what words are being said.  What this does is take the pressure off.

Right now you are thinking about YOU and how other people react to you.  So if your boss comes in and says "Get these papers done by 3" what s/he probably means is 'I need the papers by 3.'  There is a meeting or something.  If you are listening to her words that is the message you will get.  If you are focused on you. You will hear either 'you loser pick up the pace.' or 'my boss hates me or she wouldn't be so abrupt'