My roommate is eating all of my food!?

Question

I didn't sign up to be anyone's "mom." I work all week so that I can buy the specific foods that I like and that suit my dietary needs, only to find that my roommate is digging into my supply, often more than I am or before I even get a chance to; since he is at home all week while I am working, I can't really keep an eye on my stuff. An example: I bought a $5 12-pack of string cheese so that I could take one to work with me a couple days a week. Within one week, I had eaten one, and there was only one left! He never asks, or even acknowledges it. It would be okay if we could both contribute and share, but there is nothing of his I could take - he never buys anything!

The worst part is that he eats fast food all the time, so he doesn't really care about what he's eating. I do, so I put a lot of money into the food I eat. He takes my quality stuff, but is perfectly content to eat an unhealthy fast food meal. It's really annoying because I'm just throwing money away and now I can't even get what I want. I think I've started going crazy or something because I've started avoiding buying things I know he likes, even though I really like them too, keeping packages sealed until I absolutely want to open them, or just to have them around so he can't eat them without me knowing, like almost daring him to open them, and tracking and accounting for everything I eat.

I'm way to nervous to say anything about it... what can I do?

Answer 1

You need to tell your room mate your circumstance: that you want to reap the benefit of what you purchase.

Here's an approach: next time you go to the store, ask him if he would like to contribute something towards purchases. That is the perfect time to reveal that you just want to separate your food from his.

In your roomates defense, they dont realize how you feel. You are too afraid to say anything. Most likely, they have a 'shared' ethic going on: its only food and you dont seem to mind sharing. The worst that can happen is that he will have to give you some money for the food bill.

Answer 2

This may sound crazy, but it's the best way... find a storage box that will fit into the fridge (pantry, whatever... more than ONE if needed!) and be SURE that the box can be LOCKED!!  If you look in the Office Supply store or aisle, you will find file-boxes (in plastic... that will allow the cold to get to the food inside!) that can be locked.  Then, purchase however many you need.  Then, in the hardware store/aisle, purchase a package of "KEYED ALIKE" locks... those are padlocks that all use ONE key... that way you don't need to have several keys to get to all your boxes!  Then, keep your food, at least the SPECIAL stuff, in those, labeled and LOCKED!

I had a college roommate in my Jr year that was impossible to get along with.  By mid-semester, we were practically to the point of drawing a line down the room... MY side, YOUR side.  That was a TOUGH year!  

GOOD LUCK to you!

Have a polite day.

Answer 3

BOOKSHOP_LADY  gave a great answer!!!

You've really got to confont this guy. I would get them to pay you back, but I wouldn't agree to do any 'sharing' or divided shopping in future -as he's an ******. this erson has to learn to live with people.

You are in your right. BOOKSHOP_LADY is right, don't say "I eat healthy food..." Plain and simple - you buy food or yourself. He is to leave it the **** alone. DO NOT say anything about his food or him not sharing his food. you DON'T WANT his food. you are self-sufficient and he should be, too.

If he has a problem with that, then he's got problems. But you must stand your ground! Otherwise this'll make you miserable and you will go mad. (I used to keep taking food greedily as a kid. My mum left some laxatives in the kitchen...I ate them!!) LOL!!

Answer 4

Have a discussion with your roommate on this issue.  Decide what food is reserved for what person and what is "community".  If this does not work, require your roommate to contribute to the cost of replacing your food.

Answer 5

I don't understand why you won't just confront him and tell him to stay the F*** out of your food.  You really should not have to live like this.

Answer 6

Wow. This is exactly how my old roommate was. Everything you said clicked with me. I went crazy. I finally decided I would confront him about it. He had the audacity to tell me he contributed to groceries as well! He went shopping once in the entire year we lived together and bought nothing but cheap c**p that I never used or ate. Then I found out the most disgusting thing. He had also been using my bar soap on his body!!! Not to mention my lotion for male alone-time purposes (ahem)!!! I couldn't take it anymore. Any dry foods that I ate I kept in my closet. I stopped buying the good food that I liked as well. Yelling at him did not work. He was in denial about everything and it was useless. I moved back into my parents house and never had I been happier. If your roommate is a bit more tolerable than mine as far as not denying things, I'm sure just labeling your food will do the trick. If not, the laxative idea will definitely solve your problem (just kidding).

Answer 7

Are you familiar with laxatives?

Answer 8

If you don't have the backbone to talk to a roommate, how in the h*ll are you ever going to learn to negotiate or compromise with a spouse?  Or raise kids?  Living with a roommate isn't practice, but it sure does show you whether or not you're adult enough to handle real relationships.

Now .... Get your grocery receipts from the last 2 or 3 trips.  Mark the items that your roommate has helped himself to.  Figure out how much he ate, how much you ate, and divide the costs.

Then sit him down and give him a list.  Tell him in no uncertain terms that you are not a married couple.  He doesn't pay for groceries, therefore he is not entitled to help himself to yours.  Since he's been doing so, here's how much he owes you for the last month or so.  In the future, you will be glad to share provided he hands you xxxxx in CASH once a week.  (You'll have to figure out what's a fair amount.)  And remind him that if he pays for half the groceries, he is welcome to eat HALF.  And that's all.  If he eats more, he hands over more cash.

Don't get into the whole blame game of "you eat junk and I eat healthy" because that's nothing more than name-calling and it isn't productive.  Do remind him that you buy groceries to provide your own meals, which includes lunch and snacks that you carry to work, and he is being grossly unfair to you to help himself and leave you with nothing to eat.

You are in the right.  So don't let him twist anything around and try to put blame on you.  Stick to your guns.

If all else fails, you can buy a lock for the refrigerator.  If he wants to keep his beer or sodas cold, he can buy a cooler to put on the patio and keep it full of ice that he buys at the convenience store down the street.

Now go handle this.  You're an adult now.  You're allowed to set rules regarding your own belongings.  So do it.

Answer 9

When my sister was my roomate, she did the same thing and let her friends eat my food. I went and bought a label maker made labels for all of my things. It is not that I am a fat selfish person, its just that I worked so hard for my food while she would get stoned all day with her stupid raver friends.

The labels worked... for a while. Then I got creative and would tell them stories about how much I liked to rub my veges in my butt crack and gross things like that.

They backed off.  

Answer 10

You're being ridiculous, shopping that way.

You should NOT be nervous to communicate with your own roommate.  If you are, then that's a problem in itself.  

Talk to him.  Tell him he has to buy his own food.  Or contribute half to the grocery bill.

If that doesn't work, padlock the fridge... or just kick the bum out.    It doesn't look like he's helping you with expenses anyway.

Answer 11

If he's eating fast food all the time than he must have money coming in . You could offer to do the shopping for both of you ,Getting his money up front of course . If not start putting your name on the items you don't want him to touch. But you are going to have to say something . Avoiding the problem won't make it go away.  

Answer 12

Poision all your foọd or put a ton of laxitive in it. then when they eat it they will be sick or have to use the bathroom. You gotta lock him outta the bathoom. do the laxitive one or youll go to prision, but its funny to do x lax.

try it it works!!