My sister's sneaking out on her bf?

Question

I live in another state, and my sister has decided to move with me. She's with this guy that's such a jerk, and whenever she breaks up with him, he makes it impossible for her to leave ex: takes the keys to her car. Anyways, she's moving with me out of state, and not letting him know until she gets there. She knows it will be hard, and needs me to keep her from going back to him. What should I do? It's going to be stressful for me helping her, because my boyfriend of 4 years just died suddenly, and I'm going through me own crisis. Any advice?

Answer 1

It sounds to me like you both need each other right now.  Perhaps you can lean on her through your grief and she can lean on you through hers...she will be grieving her ex...even if he abusive.  The two of you need to support each other, find things to keep yourself busy, and keep your lines of communication open.  You have to believe that everything happens for a reason, so maybe the timing of all of this is actually a blessing.

Answer 2

first of all i am extremely sorry for your loss, that must have and is devistating.

i would make sure your sister does not talk him too too much when she tells him she has left, he is a control freak! and when she does talk to him and tell him she is gone dont give details about where she is! just be there for her when she is upset about it but make sure she knows she can always find another guy who will treat her much much better! best wishes to you

Answer 3

Sounds like she needs to get an order of protection.  On the other hand, it should help get your mind off of the grief of your loss no matter what stage you are in (1. Denial and Isolation, 2. Anger, 3. Bargaining, 4. Depression, or 5. Acceptance) and allow you to focus more on the abject terror of wondering when an enraged psychotic will come for you because you meddled in his affairs.  The best advise I can offer you is this: You, me and your sister (in that order) should slide between the sheets and make the best of things.