My sister moves into her dorm wed. & I will be alone living with my mom?

Question

Im 25 years old, my sister is moving into her dorm on Wed and im afraid of what it will be like living alone with my mom. We never see eye to eye and it was always good to have my sister as the buffer around the house. Im so scared of what this will turn into. My mother is always complaining about something (for example, i didnt kiss her hello, goodbye, goodnight,) She has really been driving me crazy with this stuff for years. The more she acts like this, the more she is pushing me away. I feel like so stupid giving her a hug or kiss because I know she is looking for it yet she will never return it back to me. And this is just the smaller of the problems. She is always nit picking at me and mad when I leave the house. There is so much more that I cant even get into. What do I do? Ive been with my boyfriend for just about 6 years now. I think that he wants to move in probably around summer time of 09 because that is when our lease is up on our apt (me and my mom) so that way I wont be flat out leaving her (I do help her pay the bills) I dont know. I just dont know how to act around her because it feels like everything I do is wrong. P.S. I am the middle child - i feel like that contributes to it - I also feel like my mother is doing everything she possibly can for my brother and sister and what does she do for me? She actually got mad that she needed a lightbulb! and realized she put it in the lamp in my room and said she wanted it back...the only thing in my room from her! a lightbulb and she was complaining. How do I handle this :( I get so upset sometimes - everyone says to ignor her - and that im not crazy - but sometimes you just have to break down to someone you know? Its not good to keep it bottled up for so long. I spend a lot of time out of the house or in my room away from her not talking to her but I just get so upset like I have no parents - they are divorced and i never speak to my father - I dont know please help

Answer 1

take it a day at a time  

Answer 2

i think is time for u to spend some time with ur mom and get to know more about ur mom. I think ur mom is not the bad So try to help ur self and also ur mom. Good Luck and always remember u never try u will never know.

Answer 3

Go talk to a counselor.  Problems are never just because of one person in a relationship.  You are responsibility here also.  A counselor can suggest ways for you to deal with your mother and indentify area that you can make changes in to make the relationship work better.  

Answer 4

Hello Crystal, Poppet.

Well, My oh My,aren't we the angry one.

You are 25 and therefore old enough to lead your own Life and Stand on your own Two feet.

Would it really be so bad to wrap your arms round your Mum and tell her you Love her?

It seems to me that poor Mum has lost her way and needs some tender loving care.

She may come across as Harsh Nagging and Picky.

This could be for any number of reasons.

She may have inadvertently targeted you because you are the strong one in the Family.

My Mum never showed me Love,she would even push me away when I tried to get close to her.She was a very Bitter and jealous Lady, that never said a nice word to me other than calling me Tramp, Trollop and other unmentionables.

Through her rejection of me I stayed away and had very little to do with her in later Years. The last time I saw her was on her Death bed,4 Years ago.

To this very Day I regret not having more to do with my

Mum. I Have learn-ed a lot about her since her Death,

I only wish I knew at that time. So you see, are things for you Really as bad as they seem? Could you not work things out with your Mum? If not Sweetheart, It is Best you and your b/f look for a place of your own,and start living as Adults. Good Luck.

Answer 5

wow. maybe you need to bite the bullet and move out! your mom is grown and you are grown. just get down the road., dont look back some christmas bring her some chocolate covered cherries.

think of guilt as a sack of bricks and just set the sack down and walk away. good luck!!!

Answer 6

best thing you can do is wait and relax untill your sister moves... thing might change .... be patience worrying does not helps you...