My sister uses me as her personal ''bodyguard'' and I hate the job!?

Question

Our father was very violent and every single thing was 'fixed' with strokes and punches. During high school I was always in some kind of a 'trouble' and I was getting into a lot of fights and although I hated it - it sort of gave made me feel good about myself and I got pretty good at starting the fights and winning them and I kept my ''bad boy'' reputation throughout the high school.

I am at the university now and I really want to get out of that lifestyle. I mean, here I can be as neardy as I want because I really don't care about what people may think of me. I have become sort of a loner with rhe perfect GPA and I am quite content with my current situation and hanging out with people I would have never even talk to in high school. Here nobody knows me and I was grateful for the clean slate.

My sister is kind of disappointed with the change (I guess I was always her 'protector' at home and everywhere, she is 1 yr younger than me and she liked me being the cool brother) and she doesn't like the new me.

(I guess this is not the new me, this the real me, how I would actually be without my sadistic father around)

Anyway, she gets herself in trouble and calls me to sort out her problems all the time. She somehow always manages to set up those problems so that they involve me beating someone up. I hate doing that!

I had a fight a few days ago where I broke the guy's arm. (not on purpose, because I do try to cause minimal damage and I don't lose my temper, this was an accident) But it almost made me sick.

I talked to my sister and explained to her very seriously that I am not that ''cool'' guy she wants anymore, that we need to move on from that blah, blah. and that she needs to stop this.

She got offended that I would even think that she is doing this on purpose.

How do I get her to move on, too?

I am really worried that she will end up being all messed up like our parents and that I won't be able to stop it. She used to listen to me but not anymore.

Answer 1

I would tell your sister that if she got herself into a mess, she can get herself out of it.

If it has nothing to do with you, do not bother getting involved. She will grow up eventually, but you cannot change her. You can only change yourself.

It sounds like you are doing well for yourself. Stick around with positive people and positive attitudes. Don't get sucked back into all the negative drama.  

Answer 2

just be yourself and if ur sister dont like it, thats her problem.  

Answer 3

Correction you are still a cool guy you are just not a savage.  Explain to your sister that you are not going to run to her rescue every-time she starts some ****.  I know you are in a difficult position because you dont want anyone to hurt your sister but she needs to be taught a lesson.  The next time she calls you-you can go pick her up and drive her hone without confronting anyone.  Good luck in school.  I too grew up fighting and got really tired of it at the age of nineteen.  My friends liked to picks fights because they knew I had their back.  But after a while I would just stand back and watch when they got into an argument with someone and you know what not one of them ever got into a fight.  They just wanted to prove that they had protection but once they felt that my protection was gone they all went soft.