My six year old brother wears nappies at night?

Question

I left home four years before he was born and don't see him that often... maybe once a year, but he has just come to stay with his mum and I was really shocked to find out he is still in nappies at night. Is this normal? His mum says she doesn't want to force him to grow up, but I'm worried she might be trying to keep him young on purpose because she can't cope with older children and likes having a 'baby' to look after. (she's a lonely single parent who doesn't work and teaches him at home so he doesn't go to school and is with her 24/7). He was breast fed until he was about 5 1/2 years old and still wears bibs? He refuses to dress himself (saying I like my mummy to do it for me and I won't do it myself until I'm a man) and won't go tot he toilet by himself as he likes his 'mummy' to wipe his bottom. EVERY time he goes to the toilet he shouts for her then directs her step by step to wipe him with toilet roll, then a baby wipe, then to have talc powder dabbed on his bum. He's six and a half years old?

I tried talking to his mum about it but she got really angry and defensive and though I was personally attacking her so I backed away and haven't mentioned it again. But the whole thing really bothers me (there's other stuff aswell) and honestly I find it disturbing and creepy.

I want the opinion of other mothers... as maybe my perspective is clouded from being emotionally involved. Do you think this is all okay or is something wrong about the situation?

Answer 1

It depends what the situation is.  I wore diapers and plastic pants at night untill I was well older because I wet the bed.  It can be a confidence issue with your brother also, he might be delayed emotionally or somehow physically.  My situation I'm sure was somewhat different besides.  I grew up poor. Allmost always when I was a younger boy growing up it wasn't uncommon for me to go around wearing only a cloth diaper or maybe a pair of underpants.  That was just the way that we lived.  Because in my own case I wet my mattress at night, I mostly wore a  diaper and plastic or rubber pants to sleep.  In the summertime the plastic pants were sometimes uncomfortable when it was warm outside, but better that than have a pee soaked mattress.  It was kind of a deal for me as far as having to wear diapers. Other kids from my school never stayed over at my home because of our situation.  It was a small rundown home in the country.  We lived quite different than people are maybe used to today.  But back to the original question  your brother may just need more time to mature a liitle more.   It's probley not goin to help if you try to make a judgement untill he is slightly older.