My son's friend is teaching him foul language, what should I say to his mom?

Question

My sons is 6 and likes to play with the 7 and 9 year old brothers across the street...if I had a choice he wouldn't but there isn't anyone else to play with. The older one constantly uses curse words & twice I have caught him in my own home and sent him home for it. Yesterday my son asked me what a "d**k" was in reference to an insult, as well as what "pissed" meant. I need to say something to his mom before I no longer sallow my son to play with him again but she doesn't speak English very well...what do I do?! My son knows better than to say these things but why should he be exposed to them at such a young age?

Answer 1

You are the parent, play with your son.  It is your job as a parent to protect him and sounds to me like you would rather have him busy with these foul mouthed boys than protect him from them.  You need to step up and take the responsibility you are the ont exposing him to that behavior.

Answer 2

I know it sounds harsh, but I would either forbid or limit exposure to these kids. I think it's important for you to be on the same page as the parents of the children your son plays with. Your boy shouldn't have to be friends with children just because they're the only ones around. Perhaps you could enroll your son in some sports, art, or music classes so that he could meet other kids and have that as a social outlet. Also, chances are there will be some like-minded parents there that are involved with their children and don't allow them to curse. Personally, I wouldn't allow my boys to play with kids that I thought were trouble makers. Also, I really need to be able to communicate with the parents.

Answer 3

say nothing to the mother

What you need to do is talk about it with your son.

The important  key word here is to talk/ discuss

DO NOT TELL HIM to stop using bad language.

if you attempt to control your kids . you will not accomplish anything.

Instead have him realize how silly it is for him to use wrong words. never ever control your kids. teach your kids self reliance. my kids never felt that they had to rebel, because they decided, figured out on their own from my guidance for themselves. your job as a parent is to prepare them to live in society. not to control them. controlling your kids will teach them to be irresponsible and dependent people.

teach your kids  to think on their own. then they  will be leaders.

control your kids, they wont know how to be leaders.

Your job as a parent is not to protect your kids, but to teach them to protect themselves.

Answer 4

I completely understand.  My son has had some yucky friends due to where we have lived and a little of who he is (he is immature, easily led and desperate to please people and have people like him.)

I would ban the kids from using the language in your own home and send them home when they do it.  I would also suggest sitting your son down and explaining that there are words that are not appropriate to use; they are adult words and not for kids.  Explain that these kids across the street use them, but you disapprove.  

I explained to my son that swear words are used by people who aren't educated enough to articulate themselves better.  That by using swear words  not only to you offend other people and it is really impolite, but that it makes you sound dumb and like you can't express yourself in a socially appropriate manner.

My son is ten now and I have not heard him swear.  He is either good at making sure he doesn't ever use that language at home or where he can get caught (possible) or he's not using it at all (much more plausible.)

Take him to the library or find some activities through the city parks & rec (if available).  That way he can meet kids his own age range, in your area, who share like interests.  Hopefully they will have parents more involved in their lives as well and who are better roll models.

Best of luck to you guys and to your little man.  I hope he makes some better friends soon!

Answer 5

no u don't need to speak to there mom, she won't do anything, but you can tell the boys, flat out, do not use dirty words in front of my son, tell them you hate that kind of talk, and they (need) to try and stop, because u know their good kids, and you don't want people thinking their not. always try compliment's when dealing with 7&9 year old's, they really do want to please. goodluck

Answer 6

A six year old thinks differently than a nine year old. The nine year old is much more experienced in life and has seen more. Perhaps the nine (and the seven) year old have been exposed to a lot of cursing. It might be at the schoolyard, and it usually is. Eventually, in today's world, your six year old is going to be exposed to curse words, but he should not be at this age. Can you invite a friend his age over? I think your son should only be allowed to see the older kids if they don't curse.

A six year old who hears cursing may think it's funny, rebellious, and obnoxious (good things from this point of view) and start doing it himself. That would be a case of misbehavior based on a person's environment and surroundings.