My son goes berserk when he is teased....?

Question

My son is 10 years old. He is generally a really great kid; kind, thoughful and nice to other kids. However, when ever he gets teased, laughed at ar called names by another child, he freaks out and really looses it! He swears at them, gets into fist fights, yells at teachers who try to intervene, etc. and takes at least an hour to calm down. Then he feels very regretful and sorry about his actions. How do I get him to learn not to react so strongly to being teased? It's not so bad at school because he's beaten the snot out of any kid who has teased him so they don't do it anymore but I'm worried about summer camps where the kids he is with don't know him yet. Any ideas?

Answer 1

Poor kid.

Your son is reacting so strongly because he has not learned any other way to deal with teasing.

Help him learn some assertiveness skills.  Check out this website: http://www.kidpower.org/SERVICES/Childre...  If there is no class in your area, buy the book, which can help you learn the skills to teach your son.

All the best.

Answer 2

He has no self-esteem - was he abused when he was younger?  Did you or his other parent or other older siblings tease him and put him down and then say, "Just kidding"?  He's got anger problems, and as soon as kids find out about it, they're gonna make his life miserable in junior high.  If you don't get him some counseling NOW, he could be in big trouble in a few short months or years.

Answer 3

He needs to learn alternative ways to cope with his anger, it sounds to me like it has been allowed to go on too long. Was he ever punished for this type of behavior?

I had to work a lot with my youngest (though she did not get violent) she would explode in anger. I worked with her on saying it instead of screaming it. I have her go yell in her pillow and then come talk. I realize he cannot do that at school.

I would honestly suggest counseling because this can become very destructive for him and those around him the older and bigger he gets. I also tell my child sorry does not work if you turn around and do it again. It becomes the boy who cried wolf. He needs to learn coping skills and a therapist would be very beneficial for him.