My son is addicted to the PC?

Question

Usually I let my eldest stay on for 2 hours if she's finished her homework.

However my 13 year old son is ADDICTED to Yahoo! Answers. He is allowed on for 1 hour every day if he's done his homework.

They are both allowed 4 hours each on a Sat and Sun- but my son has been up in the night on Yahoo Answers and I've caught him on if I've gone out to the grocery store or popped over to a neighbors. I take away his TV privileges and dock his allowance if I catch him but it doesn't make a difference. Him and my daughter share a computer in the upstairs sitting room and he's assigned a password to his account, so I can't check what he's been looking at- I'm at the end of my tether and my husband couldn't care less.

How do I stop my son from doing this?

Answer 1

Unplug the computer's power cord (or remove the keyboard and mouse) and put it in your bedroom overnight.  Force him to give over his password and change it so he can only log on when you give him permission.  Log on as administrator and reset his password if he won't give it to you.

Answer 2

make him give you his password or put a new password on his account so he can't get in unless you type it in.

that's what my mom did when we were on the computer too much

Answer 3

Sounds to me like you need to temporarily disconnect your Internet access.  It's no wonder your son is addicted to the computer.............. you allow him WAYYYYYYY too much time on it.

Disconnect it for a few months.  You will be glad you did.

mb

Answer 4

take away the keyboard and hide it then they cant go on it

Answer 5

Hi!

I have a couple of ideas. You could talk to your son and daughter and get their pass words. Change them to something that you only know. That way they can't get on with out you knowing and when you get his password check to see what he has been doing on the computer. If he still tries to get on with out your permission you could move the computer in a family room, or some where down stairs. This way it would be hard for him to attempt to sneak on the computer. If you catch him take away his computer privileges. First attempt-1 hour. Second attempt-1 day. Third attempt-1 week. Explain to him and your daughter the new rules and tell them why you are doing this. I hope any of this helps you=)

Answer 6

You're upset that he's addicted to Yahoo Answers? I don't see why, it's a place he can learn stuff. No different than reading out of a textbook, but it's on a monitor, and it's stuff he WANTS to learn about. Just because it's on a computer doesn't mean that it's bad for him.

He might have a password just because it gives him a feeling of privacy too. I have a password on my laptop, it's not that I have anything to hide from anyone, it's just I don't want people messing with my files, downloading stuff, etc...

Sure, he could be looking at stuff you don't want him to, but there's ways to catch that. You can download a "computer watcher" that shows where everyone has been, whats looked at, typed, etc...but some parents kind of abuse this and read EVERYTHING that their kids type, and look at every single site they're on. If I used one, I'd only look to see if there were any nudes on the screen, if no, it's their business. I don't care if they went to google and searched for cars, because I didn't see any nudes on the screen,  saw the adress was google, so I didn't bother looking. It's easy to get addicted to spying on your kids, and it's not right to barge into their privacy quite that much though.

If it turns out he is, or just do it now, download a website blocker that blocks websites with nude photos, curse words, all the stuff you wouldn't want him reading or viewing. It will prevent him from looking at that stuff, and there, worries gone. Warn him and tell him that he'll be punished if he does it again. Doubtful he'll get around the website blocker, but you'll know if he does because the "computer watcher".

But in all fairness, he might just like being online, with no intention of doing stuff like that. I don't see a problem with being online for 4 hours a day on the weekend, and even 2-3 on weekdays. It still leaves plenty of time for him to do other stuff, and still enjoy being online at the same time.

Answer 7

I think you should take the mouse or the keyboard in your room at night...And when you catch him on when he's not supposed to be just let your daughter on for another hour or 2. and he will eventually stop...Or my parents had to disconnect our internet because my sister was addicted. and when we got it back thats what we did. And she stopped sneaking and getting on.

Answer 8

get some parental control software and block the website and/or the hours that it will let the kids use the computer.  you can set the software from a password protected account, and if you don't share the administrator's password with your kids, they won't be able to change the controls.  those programs allow you to see what the kids are doing on the computer even if they're using separate (password-protected) accounts.  personally, i'd also require him to remove the password protection as a condition of being allowed to use the computer.  if he's so secretive about what he's doing, i'd be seriously worried ... and i'd guess Y! Answers is the least of what he's doing online.  i'd also move the computer to a public area of the house where he knows you could be walking by at any minute.

i'd also seriously reduce the computer time on weekends.  the more you're on, the more you want to be on.  i'd say 1 hour a day maximum, every day, is more than enough.   or, even better, considering all the problems you've been having, just take the internet connection off the kids' computer altogether.  cold turkey is good with that kind of addiction.  i would also require him to take the password protection off his account as a condition for using the computer at all.

also try to fill that time with other things.  sign him up for sports or other activities, have friends over, do things as a family.

Answer 9

How about this...every time you catch him on when he isn't supposed to be his SISTER gets an extra hour on the computer!!

I just thought of another option. Create separate Windows accounts for each family member and create passwords that only you know...then you have to log them in for them to be on.

2nd edit: I'm sorry but I missed the part where he has his own account with his own password.  In my opinion this is the first thing you need to address...kids don't get the privilege of hiding what they do on line from their parents. That's how they end up on planes to go have s*x with an adult half way across the country. This is very serious and if your husband doesn't care you need to step up and protect them both from themselves.  Remove his account and create a new account where only you know the password.  You probably have to do it for both of them though.  Make sure the computer is visible and what they do on it is monitored.  The internet is not a safe place for children without close supervision.

Answer 10

I agree with what your husband's doing. Who cares. It's just the computer. I'm on it like all day...but I do get out of the house. I think the computer helps you learn.....I would hate to only be on the computer for 1 hour...that would suck!!! You are way too strict...It's just the computer. Just make sure they are off it before bedtime and it's fine. Get over it. Stop being a d i ck .

Answer 11

you have allowed this behavior ! ! ! !

Take the dang computer out of his room if it's in there ! !

Answer 12

It's not easy, but I would simply remind you that we are the adults and are the ones who need to be in authority and control and calling the shots in these situations, no matter how much effort it requires or how much they protest; it is not negotiable.  If your efforts aren't working, keep going to the next level until you have effectively curbed his usage.

My 9 year old is similarly addicted to anything electronic.  She would spend 12 straight hours playing on the computer on a lazy Saturday if we let her.  We recently had to ground her for using her computer when she was supposed to be getting ready for school and made me late for work.  A couple days into her punishment, as the "withdrawal symptoms" were kicking in full force, I caught her under her covers playing her Nintendo DS (could see the light from the screen -- had to laugh).  I was nice and just asked her to shut it down.  45 minutes later (bear in mind, bedtime was 2 hours prior), I peep in and she's back at it again, so I took it away, and plan to keep it in my possession for at least a couple weeks.  My next step is installing software that will limit her computer usage and shut her down when the daily usage (toying with 1 or 2 hours daily) has been reached, as well as render is unusable during inappropriate times such as before school.  That way there is absolutely no room for argument or interpretation.  That might be an option for your son as well.

Answer 13

Be firm. Set up an admin account on your PC, remove their passwords and set down more "rules" about using the PC.

Answer 14

Remove the computer from the upstairs sitting room and supervise what your children are doing online.

Answer 15

Sheesh, you're the parent, you pull the plug.

First of all, you need to get the computer into a public area. Ours is in a corner of the living room, screen facing out - of COURSE it's not practical, but we felt we had to do this.

He also shouldn't have a separate account, there's no need for that.

You must start enforcing things here - taking away tv and allowance have nothing to do with computer time. Only restricting computer time will affect computer time.... that's the natural consequence.

Now, I do know there are programs one can get to physically limit the time on the computer - it only allows a particular person a certain amount of time, but I can't for the life of me remember what it's called. Maybe someone else will read this and be able to offer the program's name.

Answer 16

Unplug the computer!!! Take it away, or sell it. Communication sites are dangerous for children.