My son is autistic he is 13 and hates school he cant read or write and just goes for the socialization .?

Question

can my son leave school at the age of fourteen

Answer 1

dont let him leave school maybe u should just change schools i mean afater all its the school its not ur son set him  down and talk to him and ask him whats up with all of that!

Answer 2

While state laws prohibit children from leaving school completely before the age of 16 (sometimes 18) there are other options:

1. Homeschooling: you can tailor education to meet the needs of your son, whether it's one-on-one time, interest based learning, tutoring in subjects that are difficult, whatever. There are tons of curriculums available as well as homeschool co-ops and support groups around the country.

2. Vocational education: many school systems have programs where students spend a 1/2 day at school and 1/2 a day in vocational job training.

3. Try to find an autism support group in your area- parents of other autism spectrum kids can help with navigating public school problems, providing valuable social interaction, therapy options, and also the stress of raising a special-needs child.

4. The school is bound by FEDERAL LAW to make sure your child has an IEP, that the IEP is followed and is helping your son. Even if he is already in special ed, there are adaptations that can and should be made for him within the special ed classroom. Your son's doctor can be very helpful in deciding what to do about adaptive education.

Don't give up!!

Answer 3

You say that he is only going to school for the socialization, but do you know what kind of socialization he is getting? Have you ever sat in on the classes or seen what happens when he walks through the halls? Some schools have truly wonderful special ed programs, where kids improve their social skills and learn to be around other students. Others don't have the staff to manage kids at various levels of disability and have either unstimulating or overstimulating classroom environments, meanwhile, 'regular' kids have many opportunities to pick on them while walking through the halls.

My school happened to be one of the good ones: in my theater elective, some of the higher functioning special ed kids were in class right along side us...they learned how to deal with 'regular' kids while under the watchful eyes of a teacher making sure no one was getting picked on.

If your son is increasing his social abilities while in school, then great. If he isn't, then moving him to 'life skills' (learning to hold down responsibilities in the workforce would probably count) may make more sense. Talk to your school--then talk to a social worker (since schools get lots of money for disabled kids, sometimes they don't give the most appropriate advice) and try to contact any support groups for parents in your state (online is fine) to find out what is legal, practical and useful.

Answer 4

I'm not a parent in this situation, but you can homeschool. If you have the time, and you're willing to put in the effort to help him out, homeschooling is the best way to go.

When I was in grade 2 my parents pulled me out of school and started homeschooling. It's so much easier, and so much better. You can take time to actually learn, and detect school-work that your son has trouble with.

If he just goes for socialization, there's really no point. He could homeschool and LEARN just as easily, and still socialize. He could join a club, join a sports team, or even take an online class so he can chat with other students (you can take online classes for select classes if you homeschool)

Best of luck to you and your son. =)

I'm sure he'd thank you in the long run if you helped him to learn for the sake of his future.

Answer 5

You need to speak to professionals about this starting with your family doctor to get a referral.

Good for you, for putting the needs of your son first!

Answer 6

no they have to be 16 my mom drop out at that age so did my dad but he went back for plumbing and he makes a lot of many and tell him if he wants to play football pr soccer ect tell him he has to go to collage

Answer 7

You might want to consider sending him to a school that has trained special education professionals. I'm sure you already know that Autistic kids, if trained properly do very well in life.

Meanwhile you can research the web and try to use tips to help build his skills.

A good starter is in the link below -

http://kids.lovetoknow.com/wiki/Teaching...

All the best to you and your son.

Answer 8

i think that it would be best for your son to continue his schooling,and that check if he has a special education teacher that could attend to his special needs, and could attend to his reading and writing skills development. if he leave school, he will be more withdrawn with himself, and he might not be socially adaptable to change. in time he would be able to develop even a very minute detail.... lets just hope for the best.  thats what i think...thank you.

Answer 9

At what age he can drop out of school depends on where you live. It's not usually before 16, however.

You can homeschool at any age during the school years.

Answer 10

you might want to look into alternative education, homeschooling, cyber schooling, or maybe private schools.  I know the later could be a big financial drain on some families, we struggled to send our girls to private school because of all the problems in our school district, even with some financial aide.  

Check into financial aide and grants and scholarships.  There might be alot more funding available for you to send your son to private school BECAUSE of the autisim.  Our girls went to Montessori(ours only went K- 8th grade), and I saw it was a great enviroment for them, as well as special needs children.  Now my older one has moved onto charter cyber school.  Charter schools are also an option (small schools in your district, alot of times started as a grass roots by parents and communities).

I cant really explain Montessori to you, and the website is great, but its something you need to go and SEE a classroom for yourself.  I wish you the very best, I'd hate to see your son be in public education merely for socializing.  contact me if you have any questions- rescuebabe2002 at yahoo

Answer 11

He cannot leave school until he is 16.  Don't they have  special classes for him?  Get him involved in music, autistic children seem to excel.

Answer 12

13 is to young to leave if he is going to school that's a bonus. Even if goes their for socialising he still is learning, as socialising is very important for adult life. If you take him out of school he gets what he wants. As everyone has to do things we dont like but that's for now as he needs an education. And if he has reading, writting problems now it will be worse for him Later in his life. As you are not teaching him to do things on his own. (job hunting, paperwork, managing his money, cooking living)

I am ADHD and dyslexic, death in left ear my hardest is that I  cannot spell very good. My father put me in all programs that supports my needs. Its because of him that I can read and write.

Not sure what country you live but he needs support. for his education the school should be refering him to a program to helphim further.

Answer 13

There are situations available to him where he can learn and gain social skills. Homeschool is one of them. Many parents in your situation choose this method of education with great success. I encourage you to learn more about your options, including homeschool. Bless you and your son. Good luck!

Answer 14

Why do you want him to leave school?  If you feel that they aren't teaching him what he needs to know, have it written into his IEP.  If you don't feel that he needs the socialization that the school is providing and you are looking for other options, call the school district (not the school) and ask them if you can homeschool but take him to the local school for special education services only.  

I have two in an online school both with special ed services.  It's been the best of both worlds.

Answer 15

My son is 12 and has aspergers. He did not just 'leave school', but he is now homeschooled. It has worked out very well, both of my children with autism learned many more academic things at home where they could relax and being autistic without people bullying them. Ironically, they've also learned much more about socializing in smaller settings, and are much better in settings with large numbers of people.

Now, when you say that he goes for the socialization, is that his choice? He is naturally very sociable? Because most kids with autism who are social are usually inappropriately so. So does he socialize appropriately, or pay too much attention to the wrong things?

Dropping out of school means that you need to check your state's laws for mandatory age of education, and I've never seen one lower than 16.

Answer 16

*jaw drops*

I have a special needs 13 year old as well, and the answer is

KEEP YOUR KID IN SCHOOL!!!!

Answer 17

No. You can go to jail. He can be sent to alternative etc.

Answer 18

I'm appalled at the responses from Sara and Nancy C.

Sara, just because you needed an @ss kicking, doesnt mean someone else does.  Implusegirl's son could have a totally different form of autism than you.  I will chalk your answer up to being immature.

Nancy C states "If your son cannot read or write at 13, you should be happy at least that he is not avoiding others like many autistic people do, but he socializes. I would not homeschool him. Socializing is very very important for his emotional well being"

This is her SON!  she IS happy!  but obviously isnt happy with public school and wants better for her son.  How trite that she should be happy he isnt reading and writing at 13, but is at least social!  CRIPES!

And you imply that the only place this boy can socialize is in public school?  so he should stay there no matter how bad it is for him???  puleeeeeeze!  Homeschool and private schooled children can have just as much, if not more AND BETTER social situations than a public school.

Answer 19

Don't give up!  If he can't read or write at 13, he's in the wrong school.  Autistic or not - there are ways that he can learn to communicate and lead a much fuller life for it!  You ought to try to find a program that specializes in teaching and nurturing children on the spectrum.  They're out there - and some are excellent.

Answer 20

laws should be ammended for special cases, your son  has different needs.

Answer 21

I am a professional who works with persons with Autism and some people do much better if they leave school.  It is not your fault!  Schools don't have the resources or training to assist your son in an appropriate education.  One person I know was so overstimulated, picked on, left out of the academics, and exhausted that she had to leave school.  You can talk to a psychiatrist and they can give you a note as to why your child would do better at home.  Our agency is now having social sessions and activities for teens and young adults so he may not miss the school.  Best of luck to you and your family!

Answer 22

My recommendation is Unschool/Homeschool him. Being institutionalized hurts more than helps. If you care about your kid , take a look at Unschooling and his interests before shoving him into school. Give it a chance.

Answer 23

My eleven year old daughter is very autistic. She is still mostly non verbal and after going to public school from special pre-k to fourth grade she still could not read or write.For over two years we had one issue after another with her public school. When we finally had it after two years of them not listening to us I decided to homeschool.

Now, after eleven months of officially homeschooling she is able to read first grade primers, write her sight words and can verbally answer simple questions about pictures in her school books. I realized how badly the public school had botched the job of educating my daughter.

You can pull your son out of school at any age, just be sure to call it homeschooling. Home School Legal Defense Associations website has the homeschooling laws for every state. You can look those up for free but to join HSLDA costs $115 a year per family and I strongly reccamend doing it.

In my opinion, if there is a way to teach your autistic thirteen year old to read and write (the very basics of education)and his public school has not found it the they have FAILED him. The more my daughter learns to read , the more verbal she becomes. We have had wonderful success with old d**k and Jane style primers and Saxon Math Kindergarten. At the age of ten we started all over again with school since she is so far behind academically.

Answer 24

Please consider homeschooling your son.   While he cannot leave an "educational setting" he can sure leave the "school" setting.  

My son has Aspergers and we started homeschooling over 4 years ago.  Best thing we ever did.  He was able to de-stress and relax at home.  That helped his learning skills a lot.  

Also, once at home and relaxed, his social skills jumped by miles!  There was no more bullying and peer pressure.   2 years after being at home, he was able to start reaching out by himself and making friends.  

Ignore the ignorance of so many that jump on here and write of things they know nothing about.  School is not the perfect place for a lot of kids.

Answer 25

You need to make him get his behind in gear. He needs an education, and he needs a father. You need to kick his ***. I have a mild form of Asperger's, and I used to never apply myself in school. Then my parents kicked my *** and made me start doing my work. Now I'm a good student getting letters from Harvard.

Answer 26

Talk to the counselor at his school. The counselors know all the alternative solutions. If your son cannot read or write at 13, you should be happy at least that he is not avoiding others like many autistic people do, but he socializes. I would not homeschool him. Socializing is very very important for his emotional well being.