My son is going thru a confrontation stage with me - How should I handle it?

Question

He's 15 and very intelligent and he argues every point. I can't beat him in an argument because he always has a clever way of retorting it. I'm not talking about going to bed. It's more about every day conversation. Otherwise he minds me when giving direction.

Answer 1

It's not confrontation it is debate. Sounds like you need to do you to your homework on "every day" conversation. If he's winning you need to think of an argument to support your facts obviously he's already done that.  No offensee intended but it sounds like you need to grow up.  When it comes to music each to their own-- still sounds like debate and thats a good thing. Blessed Be.

Answer 2

It is strange but people say that teenage girls are difficult and while my daughter did have her moments and basically her brothers are good kids, there have been moments when the need to strangle both boys have been there.  My youngest is also 15 almost 16 and at the start of this year my wife and I had concerns that an alien ship had come to earth and taken our reasonable, well mannered and easy going son and replaced him with a doppelganger.  

I have also had this same conversation with one of his friends fathers who stated that it was good to know that his son was not the only one displaying hormonal attitude.  

I think you really just have to hang in there and try to stand your ground as much as possible, while giving them a little bit more rope than you usually would as this age just seems to be really difficult for boys.  they are either one emotion or the other and it is always in extreme.  

We have found with our son that on the occasions that he is in a receptive mood it is good to try and have a chat about how we feel about the negativity in the house and that does seem to help.  At the very least when he has had a moment he does tend to apologise afterwards.  That is better than nothing.

Just hang in there as it will pass.

Answer 3

What kind of arguing? Is he voicing his opinion, if so, there's nothing wrong with that because it develops good skills. If he's disrespectful like not listening to you then it's a problem.

Answer 4

Don't argue...agree to disagree. His objections to bands is an opinion and he's entitled to his own opinions. Opinions aren't necessarily wrong..they're just personal views. As a parent, we must pick our battles, bands and other simple things aren't battles.

Just tell him, I disagree with you and this is why...then let him say his peace and then drop it. Don't argue about it.

If this is putting a wedge between you two, then try to find something the two of you see eye to eye on. He may be looking for some sort of common grown between you. Or maybe he just enjoys debate.

Answer 5

Take it easy he is just find ing his own identity- Do not undermine him, I am not sure if you are a mother or a father! However whichever parent you are it is crucial that you do not lose CONTROL and scream and fight back-you are the adult if he shouts or such tell him firmly & in a low voice, Once you are calmed down lets talk about it-Yu have to be a role model and NEVER EVER DO What one poster has suggested beat him slap him Where this person comes from I can  well imagine He /she has NO clue and should not have written such- You do not want fear and hatred instilled in your son- Let him know you respect his views but not necessarily agree with them

Please do not ARGUE and  have a battle of words this will break the delicate fabric of a parent child bond

Let him know first that you care and love him - Give  him space and do not NAG  or threaten him I will do this and do that stuff-This will only make him CHALLENGE YOU FURTHER AND  YOU WILL FAIL TO KEEP YOUR WORD or you will do things that you will regret later

just think  back of your young  days!