My sons preschool has a no drop in policy for the parents. Can they do this?

Question

My son starts preschool in two weeks and I found out that the school district has a no drop-in policy for parents. They say it disrupts the students to have people just drop in. Every magazine article I've ever read has said that I should worry about a school that won't let me make surprise visits.

Answer 1

It depends on the school.  I teach in a preschool where parents are not encouraged to visit their children and the teachers are the most caring individuals.  My children were in pre-schools where there was an open-door policy, but I'm not sure that those schools were any better or if the staff is any more involved with the children.

I remember reading in a magazine that it was not a good idea to take my child to social setting before they were three months old.  If I had listened to that advice, I never would have gone to the supermarket or any other store.  I thought it good for me and for my child to have some interaction with other people.

One of the reasons some pre-schools discourage visits from parents is that some children have an aweful time separating from their parents.  When those children see that the parents of another child is visiting them, they may get anxious or insecure that their own parents are not visiting them.  So instead some schools invite the children on their birthdays or specific events.

Answer 2

This should send up a lot of red flags.  My first question is what are they trying to hide?  He is your child and you have every right to drop in at any time.

Answer 3

IT DOES'NT MEAN THAT THEY ARE DOING ANYTHING  WRONG.BEING A PRE-K TEACHER MYSELF. I WELCOME MY PARENTS ANYTIME BUT IT SOMETIMES TAKES THE CHILDRENS FOCUS OFF OF WHAT WE ARE DOING. SO IT HAS ITS UPS AND DOWNS SIDES.BUT JUST NOT TOO ALLOW IT AT ALL. I WOULD ASK QUESTIONS.

Answer 4

I don't believe they can and I'd be worried but I also understand that it does disrupt the class, specially in the beginning that he is just getting to know the teachers and getting used to his room and peers.. think! You stop by to see him and leave, he'll be probably be crying his lungs out...it's not a good idea but I don't like this no drop-in policy at all. I want the freedom to see my son anytime I wish...It's a two way "thing"...I don't really know what to tell you...it's entirely up to you.

Answer 5

First, is the preschool a part of the school district?  Like attached to an elementary site or something?  Often, in this case, state preschools have to follow the rules of the elementary school, which may include having any adults that wish to come onto the campus sign in first.  In any case, a school may NOT say that a parent may not come to see their child at any time they wish.  They may say that you may drop in to check on your child, but only if you check into the front office first (so they can make sure that not just anyone off the street is coming into the center), but if you want to see your child, there is no way legally that they can forbid you to do so.  It does disrupt a classroom to have people stop in, but if you can check on your child in an un-obtrustive way (peek in a window, watch through one-way mirrors) then there should be little to no resistance from staff for you to check on your child.  However, if this is a private preschool- I would bail and run... a preschool that does not allow the parents an "open door" policy where you can come check on your child at any time, is #1 against the law, and #2 a place I don't want my child to attend.

Answer 6

if i were you i would take my child to a different school

i don't think there is anything wrong with droping in

its your child the school is not tio be able to control who visits from who doesn't.

Answer 7

I own a private preschool in Ohio and that is certainly against state law here.  Any parent has unlmited access to the preschool at any time their child is there.  And they are always more than welcome.  Yes, it can be disruptive but as your son's parent, you have every right to drop in at any time, announced or unannounced.  I believe they are breaking the law.

Answer 8

I worked in a private preschool for five years and we had a policy similar. It stated that parents were not allowed to disrupt the children, but if they wanted an observation time or needed to check on their children they were open to do so at anytime. If the children are specially young then the reason they have this policy could be of seperation anxiety. I would simply ask for the reason for this policy. Did something happen in the past that causes them to have this policy? That might be a large reason why they have it.

Answer 9

Parents who drop-in often are fishing for something #1.  Rarely have I found that they are doing something else.  Those who are just stopping by still cause a disruption.  Kids turn and look.  Leave their areas.  Parents distract teachers from preventing issues or dealing with them effectively. When parents leave, there are still other problems.  Kids cry for their parents... even if it wasn't their parent dropping by.  It's just part of pre-school nature.  

Most schools don't care if you drop in for lunch but they will put their foot down if you make surprise visits during circle time.

Answer 10

I wouldn't like that!! They are in Pre-K for goodness sake. I would find another school or something! I would not be comfortable about that at all.

Answer 11

Have them install video cameras, so you can watch from the front office.

Answer 12

preschools aren't part of a school district - only elementary and up are. so if they are saying thats their "reason" dont believe it! and there is *NO* way in h**l I would take my child there...so the articles are right - be VERY wary about a school that won't let you do that. What exactly are they hiding?

Answer 13

Are you sure they mean by no drop is that you may need to call first.  My experience with dropping in is it does disrupt and cause kayos  with the kids.   I was always good for that.  Maybe you can work it out with the teach to come in and read a book or help in another way once and a while.  Can you imagine if you are trying to set rules and set a schedule with 20 kids under 5 how difficult it is then parents each day interrupting  the routine and schedule. it doesn't work.  Don't worry. make it work for you.

Answer 14

Parents should have the right to get their children any time they want.  They do have that right.

At the same time, the question should be raised as to what boundaries are set up to protect the child from the parent?  I don't mean for that to sound bad, but think about the disruption the parent causes to the child when they come in unannounced.  When you show up, that means it is time to go home.  When you leave without them - what a disaster.  That disruption is not only unfair to your child, but to the other children in the classroom as well.

Another thing to consider is how your child is going to get into a regular work cycle if they see you there.  When parents observe, if it is in the classroom and not behind a 1 way mirror, I always tell them to observe the other children more so than their own.  His/her child will try to show off.  Try to see what is happening in the classroom in terms of concentration by observing the other children.

I would carefully read the policy they have.  See if the wording is such that they are trying to keep you out or if they're trying to stop disruptions.  Ask for clarification from the staff on this point.  Any good preschool will welcome that question and want to answer it.  The schools I have worked at were always able to strike a balance between allowing parents access and not causing disruptions.  Ask your school how they handle that and make sure they follow through on it if their answer satisfies you.  If it does not satisfy you, it is best you take your child somewhere else.  The first thing you have to have for your child's school is trust.

Matt

Answer 15

I dont know if its legal or not, but I am certain that I would not be sending my child there.  I dont trust anyone enough to do that, including family.  I can understand no drop in during certain times of the day (i.e. nap time) but an overall no drop in, absolutely not!

I've worked at one daycare and have my son in preschool right now.  At the daycare I worked at, we had parents coming in all day.  The kids very rarely even noticed the additional person, and went right back to playing as soon as they left.  The kids are far more concerned with play than anything else going on.  Parents were always more than welcome to come in.

At my son's preschool, we are actively encouraged to go in at any time.  They do special events to bring the parents in (recently it was muffins with mom and pancakes with dads).  They encourage us to go in and read stories, play games with the kids, etc.  Again, it has never caused a real disruption.  I've gone in at all times of the day, as has my husband.  

I absolutely would not send my child to a place that had a no drop in policy.  Even if I had to call before coming over, my child would not go.  That tells me there is something going on that they dont want parents seeing (not necessarily abuse of any sort- maybe too many kids in a classroom, lack of supervision, lack of control, kids watching TV all day, etc.).

Answer 16

I would take mine to a different school if there were no video and audio monitoring. I don't trust anyone but my Parents that much.

Answer 17

there should be an open door policy for preschools.  in our state there is, anytime a parent wants to visit or peek through the windows they can

Answer 18

Ask them why this is?  Personally, before I sent my son to a preschool I 'interviewed' 3 pre-schools and visited the class that he would be apart of, it was VERY telling.

The first one I saw had 15 3 year olds walking from the playground to the classroom without uttering a single word!

Kinda freaked me out, it was sooo unnatural.  My main concern here was that I didn't want his 'first' experience of school to be a negative one (now he is in first grade, I would love a 'school' that was like that!).

The second one made my appointment when there were no kids and it was with the head mistress - as nice as she was, I came away knowing NOTHING apart from what she told me about his class or teacher!

The third one, was a busy class room with a caring teacher.

I have run my own daycare and I can tell you that most care facilities that have nothing to hide do encourage at least parent participation and usually encourage parents to drop in.

After all  who in this day and age has the time to constantly "drop in" to the point that the class is being constantly "disrupted?"  If they do encounter this problem, it should be dealt with for what it is,  a one off nutter!

Hope this helps!

Answer 19

My daughter's preschool had a similar policy, and when I came early to get her witnessed a teacher screaming at her and shaking her violently.  It is extreme, but as a parent, you have the right to access to your child.  We had all sorts of rules that were to prevent disruption, but really I know it was more than that.  The teachers in this case were incompetant.

Now, all this being said . . . I have been on both sides here . . .

I have had a daycare/preschool for over ten years.  You can always tell which child has a parent there because they are usually the one that is the most out of sync.  (Sometimes mine included!)  But, that being said, I do not deny access to the parents, I do ask that if a parent is picking up and their child is being unruly, that the parent hurry along the pick-up or good-bye.  This can be disruptive to the other children.

But, the parent in me (especially after these experiences), says, drop by and bring something forgotten from home, and if your child must attend this preschool, watch very carefully.  Observe a class without him there.  Look for anything that just feels too "fake."  Ask questions, volunteer and stay very involved.

Best of luck!

Answer 20

In Ga they can require you to identify yourself to whoever is in charge, but they cannot prohibit you from dropping in. I think that is illegal and unethical. Yes. drop-ins can disrupt the class, but your child is in their care so you should be able to get her whenever you want. I would be worried about that school.

Answer 21

That is really bizarre...

Answer 22

I would take my kids somewhere else.If they don't want parents to drop by most likely than not something is going on there.

Answer 23

I'm not sure if it is allowed or not but I wouldn't trust someplace that said I couldn't drop in.  Sounds fishy to me.