My surname is Dahmer and all people think I'm a relative of serial killer!?

Question

I'm 18 .... my surname is Dahmer and I'm getting tired of all people asking when they know my surname: 'Are you a relative of Jeffrey?'..... they make me mad!....

what can i do? can I change my surname? I'm from Oklahoma and Jeffrey was from Milwaukee so why do they ask!

Answer 1

Dahmer is not all that common, and they probaly think there is a chance....who would've thought someone who's not even family disgraced your family name!!! lol!

Answer 2

wow, just deal with it i guess? XD

Answer 3

Say, "yes", look troubled, and then say "we don't like to talk about it." It shuts people up.

Answer 4

Who knows, people are Dorks sometimes. They may think it's a 'fun' way to break the Ice, when being Introduced!

Don't feel too bad, I have a Buddy named "Cain" and YES, he gets the "Cain & Able" questions.

Maybe, next time tell them, "Yes he WAS my First cousin but, he's DEAD now"!

Answer 5

I know that it has to be hard.  My cousin had the same trouble because his last name is Bundy.  I read the book by Jeffrey Dahmer's father, Lionel and he has had a tough road since his sonnn brought that legacy to the family name.  He ended up changing his name because his sons deed brought so much shame.  

I like the Technical Analysts advice.  The almost never quote is cool and will catch most people off guard.    I wouldn't change the name though.  Show people that Dahmer is a name that you are proud of.  There were several generation before you who were proud of their name and you should be too. Don't let one bad apple spoil the bushel.

Answer 6

what can i do?

Live with it, or come up with a funny answer. I have lived with "Packrat" for years. Not quite the same, but people make fun of a lot of names. His "fame" will probably fade to nothing much in 10 years.

can I change my surname?

Yes, but it is a relatively long (4 - 6 weeks) and costly ($300 - $600) process, and for the rest of your life you'll have to show a notarized copy of the change when you apply for a job, passport, security clearance . . ..

Also, your parents and grandparents will be offended.

Also, your records (like high school transcripts to get into college or the Navy) will confuse people.

. . . so why do they ask!

Because it is such a  rare surname. Had he been Jeffery Smith, the 3 million Smiths in the USA would have been safe.

None of these are particularly brilliant solutions. Some questions don't have good answers. It won't do you any good, but count your blessings. Jeffrey may have had brothers, sisters or first cousins. We know he had parents; I don't know if they are alive.

Answer 7

Maybe you could make a joke out of it.  Say "Look, in the Dahmer family we don't like to talk about that aaahole in Wisconsin.  The rest of us Dahmers almost never kill or eat anyone."

P.S. It's the "almost never" that makes it funny.