Question:

My teenage daughter just asked me why are all adults so full of themselves ?

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Because she caught me by surprise with this question, and I thought better to avoid answering, I said: "sweetheart, are you not hungry yet?" for which she replied "I am not a baby anymore, answer my question straight if you think that you are that smart!!!!!" .

Because I am not that smart I thought better to post her question here, and I appreciate your answers .

Thanks a lot .

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17 ANSWERS


  1. Life's experiences keeps the glass half full.  The other half is anticipation based upon experience.


  2. Adults are arrogant on account of their experience opposite the teenagers and for energy opposite the oldies.... a combination that makes them the most powerful among various people in terms of age group...... yes, I said arrogant, because the obvious superiority is only peripheral...... in reality, it is the teenage power that drives the future, one important reason why I so sincerely and gravely grieve the falling morality and rising apathy amongst them. However, by asking this insightful question, your daughter has shown a spirit and wisdom that you need to nurture and encourage, since it shows she is not apathetic nor lacking in moral courage.

  3. let her join our forum.

  4. I advise my prodigious offspring and homely brethren if they follow mothers rules and guidance one day they too will be as full of themselves as I am. This also assumes that we are a sum product of ingenuity, virtue, wit and proficiency, and to be therefore full of ourselves if to be delightfully narcissist in the extreme.

    What else could *we* possibly wish to be filled with ... ?


  5. I don't accept the proposition that "all adults are so full of themselves."  However, I would say that it's because we've all gotten through being teenagers who think we know everything.

  6. Well i gather you are a fairly young mother since many nolder ones would just dismiss that question as teenage stupidity and such. So thanks from us all. (I am 14 myself!)

    Your daughter seems like a smart little cookie. Unfortunately those are the ones you have to watch, they know their rights and know more than you think somethimes!

    You see why she asked the question (in my opinion) is because us kids are so used to hearing about us supposedly thinking we know everything and that we are up ourselves. And i assure you...none f use think we know everything.

    But we are sick of parents thinking they are better than us because they are older, in a tone that suggests we are ignorant idiots. We get tired of being thought of as people with no opinion/mind until we are 18.

    To us kids most adults seem to think they are so much better than us,  and such. They seem really up themselves.

    I suggest you talk to her about this and say that you are not up yourself (i assume you aren't) and explain that you know where she is coming from. I am not an adult so i can't really help!

    You have to find it in yourself and examine how other adults relate to kids and explain to her why you think that they are up themselves.

    I wish i could help more. Email if you want anymore help! Goodluck!

  7. With that sord of wording, the pot's calling the kettle black.

    Smile and tell her that pretension as a teenager is the source of ostentationess in adults.

  8. Staying ahead of the brats is the meaning of life, once they think they have gotten the better of you, you may as well lock yourself away for eternity. Keep the upper hand, take the higher moral ground and stand firm for your beliefs.

    Appear right when you are undoubtedly wrong. It’s the only way to handle hormonal offspring trying to thwart or undermine your power and authority.

  9. Hahahahaha, that's beautiful my friend, they surpass the master & you have got to feel proud. Sometimes I have to say I will have to think about it, we raise them in the hope that thay will know & speak their mind but it still pulls the rug of reality out from under ones feet when they can debase us with such clever precision.

    My girls are out of their teens now, all the best mate. lol  

  10. In my experience 99.9% of all adults are full of themselves and 99.999999% of teenagers are. As a teacher, I find few teenagers who care about anything outside of how the world views them. (what clique am I in, doe smy hair look right, is this a cool thing to say? etc) But, not to dis adolescence, most adults are no better today. Most are still going out for the latest styles, speaking in the same cliches they did in their youth and are less self-aware then their family pet.

    So, I guess the answer would be; "Honey, nearly everyone is full of themselves; when you find someone who isn't, they usually are considered a saint, guru, cult leader or avatar." When King David danced through Jerusalem naked it was to prove that he was not full of himself... and there are countless books, movies and stories about him as a result of his superior wisdom.  

  11. Tell her it only seems like adults are full of themselves, but most really aren't.  Adults can only do what they think is best and stand by that, even when it turns out to be imperfect.  Maybe that makes them seem full of themselves, but if that's the price to keep the world going and to protect and care for their children, then it's little enough to pay.

    I don't know how old she is, so I'm not sure exactly what she'd understand, but this is my understanding.  I'm 19, if that matters to the answer at all.

    Or adults have just had a lot longer to fill up, lol.

  12. To a great extent teenagers are right; we adults ARE full of it!

    Think about the mixed messages we as a society of supposed adults send out to our youngsters. Telling them to be environmentally aware whilst covering the planet in fumes, wrappers, carbon dioxide and McDonalds. Telling them to practise self discipline and restraint whilst fighting wars against people who disagree with us.Telling them to be honest and trustworthy while putting up with politicians you wouldn't want on your shoes.

    Teenagers are not stupid. In fact, they often cut straight to the heart of the issue because they are not yet conditioned with the prevailing protocols of political correctness and duplicitous politeness that characterises much 'adult' interaction.

    I would answer her question honestly, tell her it is because they have feet of clay, they do not think deeply enough and are mostly too consumed with their own selfish little objectives, desires, grievances and disputes to stop and think of others, of the beauty there is to be had in this world and to actually care about it.

    Tell her to always think for herself, question other's motives, follow what she believes to be the right path and be open to the possibility of a different perspective. Tell her you love her and you are glad she feels able to ask you such a question.

    Then give her a hug, it says far more than words.

  13. And you didn't think to reply, "I don't know, sweetie, why are teenagers so full of themselves?"???  

  14. well i think people are potentially wiser as adults than when they are kids..less innocent for sure..but still wiser..and the reason for both of those is experience! with experience you get a more intellectual air about you, as unintelligent as you may be, you will most likely still be more competent as an adult than as a child, but as i said less innocent..also because of experience.  I think its wayyyy too broad to make blanket statements and say ALL adults are full of themselves..but many are for different reasons.  several reasons could be, 1) adults feel they have seen and heard it all. 2) adults have to "step to the plate" and try to take on being indepenent, which gives a more confident air to somebody you know? tell her this stuff but also include like i said that not all adults are like that..and there are many adults also who have false confidence..they think they are a lot better than they are, and they lose sight of themselves.  

  15. Adults refuse to accept that the child has grown up and can think independently.Your daughter appears to be right and you should act as a bestfriend rather than an old fashioned father.

  16. During the maturation cycle of human development, most individuals will eventually reach a point where they begin to assert a growing sense of personal independence.  Even Prince Sakiyumani, who became the Gautama Buddha did this when he disobeyed his father and left the palace grounds so as to witness for himself life and was then exposed to the suffering of humankind.

    Your daughter is now doing the same thing.

    When this one was much younger (approximately four decades younger...), the adults with whom he was associated in some manner (i.e., parents, teachers, politicians, doctors, priest and religious, business persons, etc.) often expressed less than factual information and poor formed opinions that were biased and harmful to themselves and to others on a wide variety of topics.  From this ones then personal experience, this one knew that such was incorrect.  This one then began to listen less and less to said persons.

    When this one became what might be considered an "adult", at least physically if not emotionally and psychologically, this one began to see that there was some amount of wisdom in what he had previously been told although said wisdom did not reach the level that those who had professed such thought it had attained.

    This is all a part of the realization that our parents and other authority figures are not "gods" who are infallible, all wise and/or all knowing.  Perhaps this is the truer meaning of the concept of one loosing his or her innocence.

    Since the birth of this ones daughter (now seven years,ten months and sixteen days old), this one has been honest in explaining to her when this one lack factual information and knowledge regarding any particular issue or topic.  We employ said moment as an opportunity to learn together abut the same.  In this manner, this one has been completely honest with his daughter as well as in explaining that no one holds all of the answers or knowledge of all that is but that such is rather a lifelong pursuit of the same.

    Perhaps trying to redirect or deflect the question and the obvious answer and insuing discussion, you accidentally proved her point.  Being honest, in loving kindness, compassion, caring and mindful awareness is very important.

    Your daughter made a generalization as not "all" adults do anything.  Perhaps it is wiser to not employ words such as "never", "always", "all", etc. as one might eventually find the exception to the supposed rule.

    This one hopes that parents will try to do their best in assisting their children to grow into wise and aware adults and this one is certain that you are trying to do the same.

    Be well, please, be wise and talk to and with those whom you love often and honestly.

  17. Methinks a huge part of the pain teenagers feel is the process of gaining their adult fullness. Be patient, love. It really is a painful process and some compassion from the adults in their lives can go a long way in helping them manage it.

    My own kids are in their 20's and undergoing the even more painful process of seeing that they and their clever friends aren't any more clever, magnanimous or s**y than their parents were. The older they get, the smarter their parents get. Including me. I don't think I'll ever be as smart as I was when I was 16.

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