My thoughts are tearing me apart!?

Question

I have these thoughts that I've been obsessing about for just about two and half months now. They scare the h**l out of me.

They are about an incestuous relationship with my dad, and I DON'T WANT THESE THOUGHTS. It's like I'm not the one even thinking this. It also feels like I can get over it at any moment, but then I can't.

I know it's confusing. But I know I love my dad the right way and he has always been a great dad to me, then why do I fear that these thoughts will come true.

Why do I keep mulling over them? It scares me that I'm actually having thoughts like these. That I always have to convince myself that nothing is going to happen.

If it helps, I'm 14 years old and female.

Please don't tell me to get help, it doesn't help. I would really love just to keep this underwraps. Plus my attempts to get counseling have already failed.

Answer 1

You may just be looking at that in the wrong way.  If you are 14 you've probably not had many close relationships with guys.  But you do have a good relationship and love your Dad.  And as a healthy young person you have a curiosity/interest in s*x.  So when you wonder about an adult relationship you are putting the "known" with the "unknown" and combining them - that is, you'd like to have relationship/s*x with a man that you know, like and love and you haven't met "him" yet so you "fill in the blank" with a man you do know and love.  That's not unusual. Do you remember that OLD song named, "I want a girl just like the girl that married dear old Dad" ?   It's normal to gauge/measure opposite s*x potential partners as compared to our "other s*x" parent.  This might mean that you especially feel that your father is a pretty good man and that it will be difficult to find someone comparable to him.