My three year old soon to be 4 throws fits and there is no talking to her in that state?

Question

My daughter is three and throws fits so bad she screams at the top of her lungs crys yells so bad that it sounds like we are beating her all becuase she doesnt get her own way like we will be outside and she will be playin and when its time to come in around an hour or two later she throws a fit or if i tell her no she throws a fit i cant deal with it anymore ive tried everything from tryin to distrack her spanking, ignoring her acting like her time outs literally everything u can think of and more its gotten so bad shes goin on 3 or 4 fits a day im at my wits end i cant do this anymore its so stressfull and sad to say i dont wanna be around her anymore i love her she was an excellent baby never cried this just really started when she hit about 2 and a half i need some advice on what to do i dont smoke and i feel like smoking its ridiculous i really need help

ohh ya she is in day care and they say she is a god send they love having her there please i will try anything u tell me

Answer 1

Hmmm, sounds like she is performing for you only. Whatever method you choose you have to be consistent with it, don't change from one to another each time. Start taking things away from her, like watching her favorite show when she acts up. If she is somewhere fun tell her once before if she has a tantrum you will leave and if she does DO it. There is a reason she is only doing this with you try to figure out why or what the pattern is

Answer 2

Why did you mention smoking? That seems sort of random, unless you are thinking of starting to smoke to help deal with the stress, or teaching her to smoke to help control her!

What is the deal?

Answer 3

Poor stressed out parent!  All I can say is you need to be consistent - I'd lift her screaming and pop her in the time out corner and not let her move. For every time she misbehaves I'd say that gives her 5 - 10 minutes of time out.  And I'd just keep doing it.  I wouldn't keep changing her punishment, or stopping and starting it.  Let her scream her head off i nthat corner and go about the house doing what you have to.  But if she moves, just lift her and pop her back there and tell her she'll stay there for the full 5 or 10 mins.  I saw this on super nanny and after about 3 days the little boy started to change his behaviour.    Afterwards you go to her and tell her that shouting isn't acceptable and she needs to apologize (and give her lots of cuddles when she does or other things to reward good behaviour).  Anyway, here's the clip from supenanny - watch it and good luck!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=okr8aK3Kb...

Answer 4

call supernanny.

Answer 5

When she starts, bring her inside and let her scream. Walk away so she can't see you, but keep an eye on her so she doesn't see you. If you do this often enough, it will stop since there is no one to perform for. When she calms down, tell her that if she does it again, she won't be allowed to play outside, go to the park, or whatever her favorite thing is. This will take more than 3 times to break her of this habit, but consistency is the key. Never give up. Once you do, she has won and the stakes will be higher the next time, and the next time and so on.

Answer 6

This might sound weird, but everytime my child starts throwing a fit I get right down on the ground and start throwing a fit with him.  He gets distracted watching me throw a fit he forgets what he is crying for.  I don't know if it will work for your child, but it's worth a try.