My wife and i were separated for about 2 months.?

Question

it was then that i fell in love with her and i tried to convince her that she was the one. i got through to her a couple of times, but then she changed her mind because she was seeing someone else. i think that is cheating. she told me today that she's pregnant. i told her that i am still here to help her but she keeps ignoring me. my quesiton isn't what i should do or not about it. i want to know how to get rid of this heartbreak as soon as possible because i feel like i am going to die. i am sorry to sound like a loser but i don't care about it at the moment. i need comfort. please help.

Answer 1

Here's what helped me get through some recent heart ache: friends, and exercise. Talk to your friends, talk to your family, call them up, go visit, stay busy and distracted. If no one is available, go for a walk, go jog, swim, do something. Get a dog, a cat or a fish. Stay distracted. Its going to take some time, and its going to be hard, but eventually it will get better, and by that time, all that exercise will have you looking good and feeling good too. I don't know, but that's the best i can tell you.

Answer 2

someone on here suggested "a new earth".  Its a good book so far, helps you put things in perspective. The like 2nd -6th pages are annoying and confusing so skip them if you want and then you'll see the interesting stuff.

Dont let your wife define who you are, if you lose her for good, are you any less than you were before?  

Answer 3

I'm sorry this happened. I guess things didn't turn out the way you had hoped and it seemed like you could work it out but it didn't. You will have to go through the grief process until you get to the acceptance stage.

Accept and embrace everything you feel..or don't feel cause you're in shock and you can't feel...it's like a boat ride but you eventually find yourself in a new place. It's never going to be like it was but it can be just as good or better.

Sometimes, you get stuck on the bargaining part. That's okay. It's not a straight line process. It kind of jumps around. You will get through this and feel better eventually.

Right now, just tell her that you accept whatever she decides and just work at dismantling an old life and building a new one. If she returns, that might be good or maybe you won't want her back when you're done grieving what you've lost and maybe you'll meet someone who you might find you trust more then you did your wife.

If you find yourself feeling guilty, accept that too without beating yourself up. "You live and you learn." Repeat that often. When you learn, you don't repeat old mistakes so often because you have found a better path.  Keep the faith!

Answer 4

Getting divorced is like having someone in the family pass away. It is the death of a relationship.  Your wife is technically cheating on you because you are still married by law, but she is no longer emotionally married to you. It is real hard, so just try to keep yourself busy.  The only thing that is going to relieve the pain is time.  Even if you get involved with someone else, you still will have those feelings.  Stop having contact with her. It makes the situation worse for you because are reopening wounds for yourself.  Let her alone. If she has made a mistake, she will realize it later, but by that time you might not even have feelings for her anymore.  Trust me....feelings die but it just takes sometime.  

Answer 5

Unfortunately, I'm going to tell you my opinion of the truth, and it's probably not comforting to you.

MOVE ON!!!!!!!!  She obviously has.

I went through a virtually identical situation with my ex about 2 years ago.  You just have to let it go.

Answer 6

yeah, thats really sucks.

sometimes it feels better to be mad than sad. ..at least it may be a nice break.

Answer 7

Have Faith that the heartbreak will get better everyday.  Know that this is for the best because she is with someone else now.  Love can find you when you least expect it.  Don't give up, just keep living and life will get better.  Sorry it wasn't a quick fix answer, but it is the truth!!

Answer 8

Many people here have a lot of good advice.  Mine to follow is spend as much as time as you can doing things for others.  It will pick you up and fast.  Volunteer.  Also, if you have nearby family... especially children, spending time with them can also really cheer you up.  Even if it makes you a little sad to think of the family that you might be losing, it is also a comfort to be around innocent loving children.  But honestly, the best way to uplift yourself is to uplift others.  

Answer 9

go to www.POF.com  and get a date for the weekend.  And  have a few shots!

Answer 10

aw..

you know, love is extremly hard, expessaly when you've married someone and stayed with them for a really long time.. you just have to be strong and believe in yourself . Try to do others things, get to your hobbies, read books, try out what else is out there, theres alot of fish in the ocean, who knows, maybe you'll find someone better. btw. stop telling that you love her and you miss her and you want her back you gotta be strong, if u show her your weakness she'll take an advantage of it.  

Answer 11

Having a broken heart is the worst thing ever!!  Note my user name. I've been dealing with one for nearly four months - and still crying daily. I know - pathetic.  But on the bright side I am no longer married to someone I did not trust and who did not treat me with respect and kindness.  It IS better to be alone than to be miserable.  Let her go and realize that you get to start all over, nice and fresh and be open to falling in love with someone amazing who will love you and only you.  Lots of luck!!!  

Answer 12

Go find a hooker, some condoms, and let your party begin. That's man talk for--Move on. Stop wasting time on her, she is nobody now. Any thoughts on her is like thoughts about death and taxes. She is not cheating, you are cheating yourself. Get some lube, and get out there.

Answer 13

Son it nothing no one could tell you,that's going to make you feel any better.All I can say to you is, this to shall pass.This not the end of the world.People come and people go.Go through what you going through and keep moving,Don't stand still to long.Keep moving! She's not the last woman in the world.And you going to fall in love again.God loves you.

Answer 14

I agree with Rosey06,You have stop chasing her for you own good, And she is going to stop and think why he stop chasing me did he find someone else? she is going turn around and chase you in stead. Try it and see what you got to loose?