My wife pushed for a threesome but now is acting like im the bad guy, what do i do?

Question

we have tried many times with different girls. all of which she picked. but now that we have messed with the same girl she is acting like I'm the bad guy. should i have not done it in the 1st place. she's the one who pushed for it in the 1st place but now i can't get it out of my mind without doing it.we only messed around with the other girl nothing sexual. what do i tell her to make her feel comfortable again?

by the way my wife is Bi.

lots of questions, please no i wish my wife was like that ones, lol.

Answer 1

oh gosh how u complicate life!!!

  

Answer 2

You should try to restate your question, because as given I'm not sure what happened.  If you were doing a threesome then it would stand to reason that you were messing with the same girl, that is what threesome is, so what is nature of you wife's objection?  

Answer 3

This makes no sense.  Your wife wanted a threesome, but is now blaming you because it happened?

If that is correct, then you have no reason to feel like you've done anything wrong -- she made the request, and you fulfilled it.  If she has remorse over this threesome, that's HER problem to deal with -- being irritated with you is supremely unfair.

Answer 4

I don't think you should have done it. There is obviously something about that girl that bothered your wife more than the others. I don't think it sounds like a good relationship at all. If you two really truly loved & cared for each other, the need to bring someone else in would have never been there. If you truly loved another person, you wouldn't want to share them with anybody, or at least that's how i am anyways. Love is obviously deeper than s*x, but s*x is a way of showing another person that you love them. If you are having s*x with someone that you don't love, then it loses its meaning. s*x without meaning is nothing more than a way of passing time between two animals.

Answer 5

You and your wife need to sit down with each other and perhaps a counsellor.  If you decide to bring a third or fourth or another person into the bedroom this should be a decision you make together.  If you have an open relationship ? then are you allowed to have s*x without your partner there, you have to decide on boundaries, whether you can have friendships or just sexual relationships with these people, are you allowed to see a guy.

You and your wife do not have that level of communication and trust, therefore inviting other people into your relationship (even in a sexual way) when you have such conflict with each other will just end in trouble.

Answer 6

Your wife is projecting. Tell her this was all her idea in the first place and to stop taking it out on you because she's become jealous. When theres a threesome between husband, wife and someone else, someone always gets hurt. Your wife needs to realize this and either stop doing it or grow up and handle it like a woman.

Answer 7

she is probably angry because you and the other girl had some type of connection and your wife felt it. that's probably why she is so angry with you. needless to say, your wife has some fault in this too for pushing the threesome on to you. if your wife is bi and needs the continous affection of another woman then maybe you two should not be together. if you really love your wife and she you, then i suggest some type of counseling for the both of you. good luck.

Answer 8

Let me ask you the question, would you consider a threesome with your wife and another guy???  

Didn't think so.  The heterosexual male imposed double standard...ugh...

Answer 9

I agree with TK9804,

I had a x boyfriend that pushed for a threesome and after that nothing was the same.

I lured from that one and I will not do it again.  

Answer 10

Threesomes mess w/ trust.

No you shouldn't have done it.

Bi or not she needs to decide what she wants & stick w/ it. You both need counseling so you can each work thru the trust issues AND set some boundaries for each other.

Answer 11

oh my god!

how are you ever going to be happy when your wife is a bi-?

Both you and she wants different things..Don't you ever want to have her completely to yourself? Maybe she might be angry because she liked some particular girl and that certain someonee seems to have been shared by you and her. what i am trying to say would adhere to the feelings of possessiveness.

Think about it.