Question:

My younger sister, she's 13, is having problems at school with this boy?

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My younger sister, Julia, is having a lot of problems in school lately. There is this one boy named Mike, who has constantly been making fun of her last name... it's a regular and normal last name, nothing is wrong with it. Whenever she goes home from school on her best friend's bus, that is also Mike's bus. He makes rude comments to her outloud... i.e- "EW!" "You're so ugly" "You're gross!" "Get out of here!"

I've been trying to tell her that it doesn't matter what people think about you, as long as you believe in yourself. I also told her just before that if you think you're beautiful, you are. I'm not just referring to beauty of appearance, I'm also referring to the beauty within the heart. The beauty that if you're confident, you believe in yourself, and you know that things are going to be okay, they will.

In August 2007, she was diagnosed with moderate scoliosis. She has been wearing a boston brace ever since, and that has been an emotional rollar-coaster for her.

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  1. Okay, the most important thing to remember here is that if she reacts to the bully in the way the bully wants her to react, the bully will just go on doing it. Ignoring a bully is one possible strategy, and generally the one most kids should try. On the other hand, a sufficiently intelligent person can also attempt to react in unexpected ways to throw the bully off. Either way, the key is for her to make it look, to the bully, as if the bullying is not being effective. You'll find that once she has a plan of this sort in mind, it will also help boost her confidence and make the plan more likely to succeed. Remember, bullies are fairly persistent, so an anti-bully strategy is going to have to be one which can be applied over a considerable period of time; a one-shot attempt will usually fail.


  2. She is adorable!!! Maybe has a weird crush on her. Maybe you should send her some flowers to school. Let him see that someone thinks she is cute, maybe he'll knock it off.

  3. she's a beautie =]

    >_x sadly the way of expressing love is harassing and teasing. Either that or he just is spilling his anger on innocents. D:

  4. When I was 13, I had surgery for scoliosis, and I had to wear a body cast all year.  There was a guy who made my life very difficult the year before my surgery and the whole year I had the body cast on.  

    I remember when someone asked me how I took the cast off to shower, and I told them it didn't come off.  Big mistake.  The guy started acting like I smelled terrible every time I was around.  I had been home schooled for months before returning for the last few months of school in the cast, so I just went back to home schooling because of the embarrassment.  

    When I finally got the cast off, we had two months of school left.  My first day back, the boy was REALLY loud in class talking to his friends.  He was saying things like, "She thinks she's so cool and so cute now that she's got her cast off.  I hope she showered for at least a day!" and "she thinks she's so beautiful."  One of the other boys said, "Yeah, and she's right," and all of the other boys agreed and high fived.  then the weirdest thing happened.  The boy who had been calling me all those awful names said, "Boy, you'd better look the other way.  That's MY girl."  They ended up fighting after school.

    He DEFINITELY likes her.  Trust me.  And please have her read this, from one girl with scoliosis to another.  She's adorable, and I can say, looking back now at 40, that I was too, but I didn't know it, mostly because of that boy.  Boys can be such turds!

  5. maybe he likes her? but whaddo i know, im a guy

  6. mabey the boy secretly likes her and just doesnt want to admit it.keep telling her that she is beautiful no matter what and that she is gods creation(if you belive in him) and that he wouldnt create anything that was ugly.

  7. What a jerk. Bullying is a very serious problem these days, I know this sounds weird and your sister will probably not approve, but you NEED to tell an adult. It's not ok for him to do that to her especially with the number of kids who have killed themselves because of bullies. We may say its no big deal and to brush it off, but to these kids it IS a big deal and its hurt that is very real and could damage her for the rest of her life! Tell your parents or someone at the school, don't be afraid to tell, that's why you have parents and principals and such. Take care of your sister.

    It definitely might be a way of him telling her he likes her, but if its hurting her then its a problem.

  8. he probally has a crush on her that is waht boys do sometimes

  9. Most schools have a "no bullying" policy, so he could get suspended for his actions - however you have to tell a teacher or parent to get the ball rolling. Also some schools have cameras on their property and buses so the school has an open and shut case in suspending him (especially if the other kids tell the truth when questioned by the school).

    If your school does not have this policy, she could be the person who changes their policies for everyone - and no one will suffer like her again! How cool is that?

    She's lucky to have a sister like you!

    Good luck!

  10. Give her good advise, like " Don't worry, you can change your last name when your 18!" Or. "You may be ugly. But they're fugly."

    Vicadin.

  11. he proberley fancies juilia. boys can be mean but its usually there way of saying they like u. if he is just being nasty he must have issues with himself.she should hold her head up high and smile with confidence, because looks arent important beauty is on the inside x

  12. The boy probably likes her and doesn't know how to express himself

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