Need help and advice urgently!!!!!!

Question

im 16 and without boring everyone and going into TO much detail i split with my boyfriend of a year and a half recently, it gave me severe deppession and i felt so low, i then found out i was pregnant and it picked me up no end and i felt great i really wanted the baby. HE however didnt, and said he thinks having the abortion is best as we are both to young and he dosent want a baby, We was talking meeting up at times and getting on well, However, i had a misscarriage last week and am finding it so diffiicult to deal with, i just want my life to end and feel as if i cannot cope, I texted my ex and told him and he never got back to me, This was over a week ago, and iv still heard nothing, we live 2 mins around the corner from him and iv seen him since when he has drove past me etc. Today i feel so low i just want to contact him, i know this may be hard to understand but i feel as if he is the only one that can help me grieve and i dont think him egnoring me is making it any better. i also dont like the thought he has forgotten about me and what has happened so soon as it appears when i see him. i feel so much pain, I want to contact him and its virtually destroying me, i dont know whether it is for the best.?

Answer 1

I was in a long term relationship, 4 years and got hurt really bad. You have to realize you are only 16, and you will date, and be hurt many more times.  My best advice to you is to move on, and learn from this relationship. Don't put up with the bull c**p from another guy. Yes, you may be hurting now, but it eventually will go away.  Would you ever want to be a guy who would not even put your feelings into the situation.  YOU were carrying the baby.  It's so easy for a guy to say, get an abortion, they don't have to deal with emotional or physical aspects of an abortion.  If he cared about you, he would have considered your feelings too.  Of course you are going to be upset and depressed, you just lost a guy you loved and a baby.  It will get easier I promise, it won't happen over night, but eventually it will go away, and your experience will make you a stronger person.  Good Luck!

Answer 2

from the sounds of things sweetie your bf a jerk. forget him and keep moving on. you can do soo much better for yourself. as for you wanting to keep the baby, im sorry it was a miscarriage because you really wanted it. but think about it, 3 months from now when your pregnant and your bf left you you will feel worse than before. i know you don't want to hear this but being pregnant at 16 is alot harder than it looks a baby is a huge responsibility. trust me your life WILL get better your just going through a rough spot and i know it seems you don't want to live anymore but you'll regret these thought one day when your married to a great guy with your kids. trust me you will be okay, god bless

Answer 3

my apolgies on your loss i will not know the pain you going thru but hang in and be strong, girl you do not need this guy yr ex to bring comfort you at all? he is not worth your fussing and all to try get him to comfort you in your time of loss? fair enough he knew but girl he wanted to have an abortion what makes you think he is the best? dear you are to fly to be stressing over someone who does not want to be of help at your time of loss, get a church or someone else and talk to them or hey turn to the BIG guy God? and drop this guy he is not worth your effort of trying to get him.  

Answer 4

sweety your dealing with a loss of a child of course this is hard. Your trying to turn to him because you think he is going to comfort you but if he was really that concerned he would contacted you. He didnt want the baby and it seems to me he was only talking to you since you had decided to keep the baby. But now after what has happened he might not feel that obligation to txt you and keep in contact. Thats messed up. You should talk to someone. Someone who can talk you through that and help you grieve. Email me if you want, its happened to me which is why I know a miscarriage is a hard thing love.

Answer 5

Honey.. im sorry to tell you this..but he got your text..and if he didnt reply and if he isnt attempting to make any contact with you, then he doesnt want to..so dont wait around thinking he's gonna call..find something constructive to do to take your mind off of the situation..they have therapy groups for teen moms who have lost their babies and dont know how to deal with it. you could also see a psycologist. they can help you cope with your probably. they could also determine if you're clinically depressed..and give you meds for it..trust me..you want to do something and fast..cuz if you were already depressed before..and you lost the baby now..its gonna be really really hard..and you dont wanna end up doing something stupid. ive been there..and its a proven fact that when a mother loses a baby she gets post partum depression..i suggest you look into it..anyways good luck..and stop worrying about that guy...he's not worth it.  

Answer 6

The same thing happened to me when i was 16, look at it this way, you are crying and feeling pain for someone that is off laughing and having fun with his friends, you are to young to be feeling this way, and am sure your going to get over it soon, dont call him and dont let him see you cry, that is the biggest mistake you can do, just continue on with your life and make the best of it.  

Answer 7

Oh sweety, you need to move on. Surround yourself with people that can pick you up and make you happy again, because he's not going to do it. He obviously doesn't care enough to give you the support you need. If you don't have friends that can help you, go to your local church or school, there is free counseling available in many places, and you need that right now.

Good luck!