Need help for my little sister?

Question

ok so my sister has just turned 9. But even when she was 8 she has always been obsessed with what she looks like and dieing. It's starting to worry me, i've tryed talking to her about it but she's still the same. She thinks she's fat, and she's underweight. I don't know how to make her see that she looks fine. She's a really pretty girl, everyone compliments her but she continues to think she's ugly. Also recently she has become obsessed with dieing. Before she goes to sleep she will say things like i might not wake up.. so she will stay awake for hours. Or if she has bumped her head in the slightest she gets everyone to check that she isnt bleeding and repeatedly asks if she's going to die. It's worrying that a child of 9 is thinking like this. Any suggestions or advice? Thanks in advance x

Answer 1

i think this might be best left to a professional. try getting her to a therapist or if you cant affor that try taking her to the schools counselor. i believe most schools have people on hand that she can talk to. also remember she is just 9 and this is probably just a phase. if all else fails take her to your parents if they dont already know.

Answer 2

well, the thing with how you feel about the way you look has nothing to do with anyone else.  everyone else in the world may think you're beautiful, but if you don't see it yourself, it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks.  this is normal, especially if she looks to the other females in the family and sees beauty.  the only way this can be treated is by teaching her to build up her confidence.  and let's face it, we all have ego problems at one time or another.  

as far as the dying, that is normal.  both of my kids have obsessed with dying at one point or another.  mine were five and four when we went through that.  monitoring what she watches could be one thing to start with.  also, have the talk about dying with her.  explain to her that everyone dies eventually, and we don't know when it's coming.  if she is otherwise healthy, no illnesses or diseases, explain to her that most people don't just die in their sleep.  and remind her, "look how many times you've went to sleep in your life, and you keep waking up.  you aren't going to die in your sleep!"  tell her that bumps, scratches, and even a little bleeding will not make her die.  and whatever you do, do NOT say "well, he was really sick and the doctors couldn't fix it so he died."  that just opens a bigger problem with her thinking she will die if she catches a cold.

my son is really sensitive to things like death.  my ex husband died a year and a half ago, and I waited eight months to tell him, and only did so then because I felt forced to.  and I had to explain to him that Papa was really sick, he had something wrong with him that the doctors couldn't fix, and he couldn't live anymore.  but I made sure to tell him that he did not have what Papa had, and he was not going to die.  then he started asking about me, about Mamaw, about Daddy.  and we finally got it worked out.  my daughter had gone to church with my mom one night, and they talked about dying and going to heaven.  she came home, and as I laid her down to sleep that night, she told me she didn't want me to go to the sky because she would miss me.  I told her I was not going to the sky any time soon, that I was going to stick around and watch her grow up.  it took some time, but I got through both of them.  it's a normal part of growing up.  be thankful that she's learning about it now.  I mean, how traumatizing would it be if she was 16 before she learned what death was, and only because her best friend was killed in a car wreck?  tell her what death is, look it up online with her, and talk her though it.  it'll be behind you before you know it.  hope this insight helps!

Answer 3

I was the EXACT same way. for every little thing, like touching someone else's sock to drinking to much water i would freak out. I was constantly in a state of fear and i was miserable.  I kept asking my parents questions regarding whether i would die or not if i touched or did something. It kept getting worse, and finally my parents scheduled an appointment with a therapist. I was soooo mad at them.  I wouldnt talk in my sessions, and then i gradually began to. Now, about 5 years later, I am totally fine. I have my moments of thinking I am going to die, but then i just get over it.  My therapist also gave me this really good CD to help me fall asleep and rid me of my worries. It was a kids mediation CD. I'm really sorry, I forget what it is called, but if you do end up going to a therapist you can ash he/she. Or try going to a Barnes and Noble, they will probably have some CD's. If she goes to therapy, remember these things take time to change a person state of mind. Give her time, encouragement and reassurance. I really hope she gets better. Good Luck!

Answer 4

I think she wants attention and she is apprently getting it