Need help with girl problem ?

Question

I met this girl 2 years ago and we immediately hit it off. We would chat and txt each other non stop. We became really close for 3 months then i asked her out and we went out for another 9 months. Somethings happened that i didn't like so i broke up with her and we didn't talk for a long time, but my feelings for her have never gone away.

Then this year we became friends again and became closer. I even took her to prom. We've been exclusive ever since then without the bf/gf title. This went on up until 2 weeks ago.

She told me about her past with guys and how she hooked up with guys after me and her broke up.

IS HER PAST REALLY SUPPOSED TO MATTER? AM I SUPPOSED TO CARE? IF SHE FLIRTS WITH OTHER GUYS DO I HAVE THE RIGHT TO BE MAD even tho we are not bf/gf(becuz i am)?? <--these are my main questions

i was going to ask her out but i could tell she wasnt into me a lot anymore and when i hinted i wanted o ask her out she said that she doesnt want a relationship with me becuz she is afraid it'll be like the last time but she still has feelings for me.

I really care about this girl, she is the first girl i have actually loved. Should i just let it go and move on dating?

and should the past stay in the past? should i not mind her past since i love her so much?

Answer 1

this relationship needs to be put to rest ....A fresh start with a new girl will be better .

Answer 2

YOU NEED TO TELL HER HOW YOU FEEL!!!!!

Her past shouldn&#039;t matter to you if you love her and because you did break up with her and she does have a right to move on even if you can&#039;t....

I think you should talk to her and see if she felt the same way when you guys broke up.... Some girls have to date a lot of guys just to get the attention of the one guy that they want the attention of or if they just want to get you out of their head and TRY to move on but they just can&#039;t... Or she might be flirting in front of you to see if you get jealous and maybe get a reaction out of you...

Try talking to her

Answer 3

People do say the past is the past but some things to determine how people will be in the future.

If she hooked up with guys after you broke up does it matter?

Answer 4

I will say that no one can hide how they feel for long! If you love someone and they are still around and you both have the same feelings but you both know that being friends is killin you both I think that when she is ready she will let you back in right now she needs to feel like she can have a steady relationship with you. Being hurt by love stinks, bad! She just may need time to figure out what she wants. How old is she? It seems to me that you two shouldn&#039;t mess around if your not going to be serious about it. I mean it&#039;s like you two are just pulling each others strings like puppets. Eventually someone is going to do something to hurt the others feelings, I mean if you love someone and really want to make it work then make that effort. But if you get close and she pushes away then that is a sign to let go. You can&#039;t love someone that wont let you.

Answer 5

I know this is going to be hard but you do need to go and move on. She loves you too but it is sometimes better to have a friendship rather than a relationship. She don&#039;t want to hurt you. The past stays in the past.  I understand what you mean when you get p**s when you see her with other guys or when she talks about it. Its going to take time and patients.

Just try and move on. You will be ok. Trust me..

Kristy

Answer 6

I am not being mean here but what if she just feels guilty and wants to make it up to you by staying with you for a while without the title? She may not feel binded to this relationship since it isn&#039;t &#039;officially&#039; one yet. I think your main questions would have more meaning when you are BOTH into the relationship.

Answer 7

the way i see it, if its meant to be its meant to be. u dont know yet. u have ur whole life to get back together with her. i say let it go for now, but that doesnt have to mean closing the door on any future possibilities. go out with other girls and u&#039;ll know how u feel about her :)

Answer 8

You shouldn&#039;t care if she flirts with other guys or has slept with guys After you broke up. You were the one that broke it off so give her a break. Maybe she is just scared because you hurt her before. I don&#039;t think you should let it go. It seems like you Two could have something really Great! If you get back in sync with each other

Answer 9

wow i have been in this situation before man.

i ended up just being friends with the girl.

we have been friends for about 5 years now.

The past really isnt suppose to matter but you knew her before she went and did all those other things with guys. and then it kinda spoils it for you especially since you really loved her. and then she comes back to you after shes experienced with all the other guys and yall hit off again. then she doesnt want to be with you. and you are not sure if she wants to be with you.

I would care about all that. because she went and did what she did then comes back to you when you knew all along that she should have been with you.

and h**l yea i would be mad if she flirts with all these guys.

but yea when that happened to me.  I ended up just dating another girl.

and i am still dating that girl today 3 years!!

and i still talk to the girl i thought i loved every now and then and we still wonder what we should have done.  But i think it worked out for the best that we never got together. Shes happy with her guy.

and i am really in love with the girl i am with now and i this is love.

cause with the other girl i think it was just i wanted her to my be my gf so bad. and it never happened we would just mess around and stuff.

but i wanted her so bad and it never happened.  we still have feeling for each other but we will never get together there is always an excuse with her.

but yea i really think the past does matter. and you should care.  

Try hitting it off with another girl.  

Answer 10

IS HER PAST REALLY SUPPOSED TO MATTER?

Effectively we all have our pasts ... many relationships are destroyed because people struggle to get over stuff that happened before them and that they have no control over.

So unless her past that you know of has something it is that is contrary to a successful relationship with you, no it does not matter. You have to learn to let it go.

AM I SUPPOSED TO CARE?

Certainly if you care for this person you should care about her and all the things that made her who she is and the person you clearly like.

IF SHE FLIRTS WITH OTHER GUYS DO I HAVE THE RIGHT TO BE MAD  ...

This really depends on the :arrangement&quot; you two have. If you are jealous then your feelings probably run deeper than you think. It is hard to be jealous when you don&#039;t care about a person.

You say you are exclusive. but not BF and GF but maybe you need to get something clear about what that all means ...

Some married folks flirt and in their relationship it is OK IF it goes no firth err. It is very much about sorting out what you both want.

GOOD LUCK to you both - I hope it all works out

Answer 11

John, honesty and communication. You need to sit her down , do it in a public place tell her how you feel and where you would like to go with this relationship and hear her heart, maybe she does feel the past could repeat itself you need to convince her otherwize, her past can&#039;t be taken back or changed so yes move on, and try to get her to move on too.

Hope this helps bud.

Answer 12

just do what you think is right, or you can ditch her and find someone else, but if you still have feelings for her, go for it mate.