Need realtionship advice on both sides. Please help?

Question

Okay, my boyfriend and I have been together for 4 years, and its like everything is changed. up until last night he hadn't had s*x in 2 months. He is always gone at his friends house, always leaves me at home every night. Like last night after we were done, i got right up, put his clothes on and went to his friends house. What is up with that. He tells me he is just bored sitting at home. He works different hours than me, so he is a night owl, where as i am not. What do you think is going on??

Answer 1

Sounds like your boyfriend is getting some action onthe side. I would start investigating where he is going at night and why he doesn't feel the need to spend time with you anymore.

Maybe now would be the time to think about going your seperate ways.  

Answer 2

i bet he is getting it from someone else

Answer 3

Well I dont think he is giving you much respect. This doesnt by any means he is being unfaithful or anything like that but he is acting very childish. Him having s*x with you and then instantly getting up and leaving was way out of line. You need to let him know that you will not stand for that! That is not acceptable. I know how working different hours can be a challenge in any relationship but you have got to respect each others feelings. I dont think him hanging out with his buddies all night long is a very respectful thing to do because he is just leaving you there all alone and that is not ok. If he is unwilling to change then you have two choices. Find a guy who will act more grown up and show you respect, or #2 deal with the way he treats you.

Good luck

Answer 4

I'd try to get the spark back into the relationship.  I disagree that he's cheating - I mean, he MAY be cheating, but I don't necessarily think that the signs you've pointed out steer toward him cheating.

Sit him down and talk to him next time the two of you have a minute.  Explain to him how you're feeling - that you feel the relationship has taken a back seat in your lives, and that it hurts you.  Tell him that you love him very much, and you want to enjoy spending more of your time together.  

Try to get him to compromise.  I feel that if you're married (and I'm assuming you're close enough to being married or you wouldn't have this in marriage and divorce) that you should be spending most of your time together.  Try to find a middle ground where you're both happy.  If he's literally going out EVERY night, try getting him to drop it down to just going out 2 or 3 times per week.  (I honestly think that's high.. my husband and I do not go out without one another more than a few times a month.. but you need to do what works for you and your relationship.)

If you cannot find a middle ground or compromise than the relationship is probably not worth it anyway.  Look at it this way.. if he isn't willing to compromise anything for you at all, than obviously you're not worth very much to him.  Why would you want to be with someone who felt you weren't worth any effort anyway?

Good luck!

Answer 5

Sounds like he is seeing someone else.  I'd end it with this loser.  I'm sure his friend is alot more than that.  

Answer 6

Reading between the lines it sound like he is cheating, getting s*x somewhere else.....Also when you do have s*x he gets up and get dress and leaves, he is not very excite.....I would advise you to try to add some adventure to not only your s*x life but your life before he walk out the door and does not come back.....that is if he is worth it....

Answer 7

surprise him with an unexpected visit while he is at his friends i would say he is up to no good

Answer 8

In the first place you guys should be married truly and honestly not boyfriend and girlfriend fornication. You're only asking for destruction not being married there is nothing stable going on between you two. You can't say much if you guys are just dating, that is not how God has intended on it to be . I cannot say I am perfect hubby and I were fornicators before we got married, meaning having s*x before marriage but you need to think of whether you want to continue in this state because you're doing exactly what the devil wants you to do and the opposite of what God wants which is s*x before marriage. That is probably why you're going through what you're going through with him leaving late at night. I know bc before I was a christian and gave my life to God I used to be in a similar relationship like what you're in i was with a guy that would be with me and always leave late at not, and little did i know he was with another girl. Things do not work out when you do not live by the bible and live the way God wants you to live. Less people know this than the majority of this world since people are so caught up living their lives the way they want and not the way God wants and when God returns, whcih he will very soon, many people won't make heaven their home unless they say I'm sorry to God and start serving him. We live in such a perverted generation, so many relationships ending in divorce and people having s*x outside of marriage. Rethink this over. I may be one of the many few to tell you this if anyone else tells you at all. Do you want to live your life the way God wants you too? If so you need to talk to your man about getting married. Also you need to find a church to go too.

Answer 9

sounds fishy, i'd follow him.  how old r u?  do u see yourself with him longterm?  if not, end the drama. you deserve more.

Answer 10

He's bored with things, but not necessarily you.

Tell him you'd like some time apart for yourself, and then do exactly that - watch him come to appreciate you again.

You'll be glad you did.  

Answer 11

2 months nothing ? he is getting it somewhere! follow him see what he is doing...

Answer 12

sounds like he has someone on the other side i would investigate before jumping to conclusions but he might