Need some advise please?

Question

I have been with my husband for 9 years and married for 2yrs. I'm 24 and he's 25. But lately he's been changing and not for the better. Used to he was so clean, he would take a shower everyday, brush his teeth, and just take care of himself. But lately he's been lazy. He goes to work everyday and that's it. He only showers like once or twice a week, he doesn't brush his teeth everyday (only like 3 times a week) and I'm just getting to be disgusted by it. I can't be turned on by him when he doesn't clean himself. But I don't know what or how to say anything to him. I don't want to hurt his feelings, but this is just nasty to me. Any suggestions?

Answer 1

I think you should talk to him and let him know how you feel.

Answer 2

You need to sit down and express your feelings. Talk to him when you both are in good moods. Make sure the way you talk to him does not involve the words "never" or "always" because this creates a defensiveness that is negative to your conversation. Express yourself with sensitivity and ask him "What you can do to help?" or "Why do you not want to take care of yourself?" Express how this affects your marriage, I assume he loves you very much, and he should make an effort to make you happy.  

Answer 3

talk to him! i cant say that enough

Answer 4

My man WAS  the same way.  I am a very blunt person and I tell it like it is.  If he comes home and stinks, I will tell him and then tell him to go take a shower.  If he doesn't brush his teeth I tell him to. Just like a kid.  When the kids are getting ready for school I always tell them to brush their teeth and comb their hair. Say the same to hubby.

Maybe you should hurt his feelings because it obvious that he doesnt think about you when he doesnt brush or shower.  Whats he saying to you?

I sure hope it works out.  Good luck

Answer 5

tell him very frankly about your disapproval of his carelessness

Answer 6

You both need couple's counseling and he needs  evalualuation and/or treatment for depression.

Frankly, I am not optimistic about a future together for you. You both were much too young to be playing house 9 years ago.

Answer 7

He is reverting to his cave men persona and he thinks you are now his mother, only there to cook and clean for him.  Its a biological dominance thing guys go through.

Answer 8

Hurt his feelings.  You want s*x don't you?  Tell him like it is.

Answer 9

Maybe he has depression.

You should talk to him and see whats going on.