Need some answers and opinions that can help a nervous boyfriend about pregnancy?

Question

My girlfriend may be pregnant on a very accidental occurence. First time with us I went in for 10 seconds and then stopped because I was nervous and so was she, and yet that 10 seconds seems to be haunting us. We have used a condom every time ever since, but she hasn't had a period in 2 months. She has no symptoms, but now is getting cramps that come and go (hopefully period), though she said she never had it like this before.

Anyway, I am only 19 and she is 20, we are both at a good college with a lot ahead of us, and though we both love kids it just feels like it isn't the time. We said we are pro-life, and she sticks by it and now I'm nervous about the idea. We both are very family oriented with our families now and want to be in our futures, but I want to go to school and be able to do everything I could for a child, and don't know how possible that is now.

Any advice, words of reasssurance, experiences, please help me. I'm very nervous and scared, never saw myself in this spot

Answer 1

If you are comfortable with ending the life of your child because it is not a good time,then I guess go ahead as long as you both can live with it. I know that was harsh but you know the baby is not at fault. You and your girlfriend were aware of what causes pregnancy. Even one time. Go over to the trying to conceive section on here and read on the women who would give anything for a baby of their own. If you want your child to have a good life but you are not ready to be the one raising it how about adoption. Watch the movie JUNO it's great for this situation.

Answer 2

Has she taken a home pregnancy test yet? It is very easy to delay your period because of stress. If she's stressed about the possibility of being pregnant, that is definitely enough to make her miss her period. And once you think you might be pregnant, your mind can trick you into thinking you are! I thought I was pregnant last month and before I knew it I was feeling crampy, having cravings, and feeling really tired. As soon as I got a negative pregnancy test, all those "symptoms" mysteriously disappeared. So, before you get too anxious about the possibility of being a new parent, make sure she takes a test to find out what is going on.

If she IS pregnant, rest assured that feelings of anxiety and fear are normal. In my experience the father feels them more than the mother. A lot of women have maternal instincts and parenting seems to come naturally to them, whereas many men have to work at it. My husband had no fatherly instinct whatsoever and was nearly in a state of panic when it was almost time for our first child to be born. Sometimes he has to stop and think about what he's doing or ask for help, but four kids later, he is the best dad I have ever seen. You would never guess by watching him that this doesn't come naturally to him.

Good luck with everything.

Answer 3

The only advice I can give is this....

She needs to take another test...and get into a dr!

If she is pregnant...obviously she will need an OB, if she is not then she will need to find out why she has not gotten her period!

Although, it could be from stress!

Always use protection!!! ALWAYS! EVERY TIME!!!

If she is pregnant it won't be the end of the world! You both sound smart...you will manage!

Best of luck!

Answer 4

It is natural to be nervous, you could be as ready as you ever thought you would be and still be nervous as h**l. But....the fact that your girlfriend is worried about it could be causing her period to be late. Get her to test, it is the only way you will know. If she is then you deal with all these questions you have about college, money etc.. Good luck.

Answer 5

I understand how you feel as far as being nervous and scared and wondering how you are going to be able to provide for someone else if she is pregnant and like other people have said below me its natural if you weren't nervous that would be a little weird. Take a breather it may be too early to pickup on a pregnancy test, but trust me if you take another test and the second line or the plus show's up faint she is deff pregnant. Give it a few weeks and take another test or have her make a doctor's appointment so you can both feel better about the situation. You just have to keep telling yourself everything happens for a reason, good or bad if she is pregnant you will get to experience one of the most precious gifts you could ever receive if not then you will know to be a little careful next time. Good luck.

Answer 6

did you do a home pregnancy test??? several things will stop a female from having her menses. do the home pregnancy and if comes up positive worry if not get over it and she needs to start birth control of some kind. You know they have birth control for men also....

Answer 7

Well d**n dude... I'm sure everything will work out. You can best help your perspective baby by getting your education. Just talk it over with your girlfriend and family... If you are really worried perhaps you should attend a parenting seminar

Answer 8

It only takes 1 sperm!!!  I will say that when you are nervous and uptight that can cause your period to be late...so (easier said than done) tell her to relax.  The tests that are out now are really pretty accurate right now. I would take one and really either way go to the doctor.  Hopefully, this is just a HUGE wake up call!!!  Both of you just try to relax either way you will be OKAY!!  GOOD LUCK:)

Answer 9

good luck first off

she has to go to a doctor who will do a scan and confirm everything

if not, has she tried a home pregnancy test?

good luck again

x*x

Answer 10

I was in the same situation at twenty.  My boyfriend finished school successfully and now he's able to do whatever he can for his little boy.  I dropped out...not saying this is something your girl should do...I did it for another reason.  But she can stay in school if she ends up being pregnant. Most schools actually offer a sitter service for moms who chose to continue with classes.  Regardless you both sound like two very stand up people who have your heads on straight.  I think if she is or if she isn't you two will be very successful in life.  Try not to stress so much.  If she ends up being pregnant than congrats...i love my little boy to death and im sure you would love your baby as well.  And if she ends up not bring pregnant, congrats on making it to college and for being a stand up guy.

Answer 11

Ok first of all if she is two months late you need to take a test.  Secondly if you are it doesn't mean that your life is over as you know!  There is a lot of aid for people in your spot!  Just take it one step at a time.  First thing being to find out if she is or not.  IF she is then start looking for options!  I mean there is financial aide for students with children for daycare and housing.  So that should be a place to start next would be finding a daycare that takes newborns!  third you need to decide if you and your girl want to keep baby or give it up for adoption so you can continue with your lives and baby be taken care of from the moment of birth!  Good Luck,

Momma_Bear