Need to get out of marital home. Worried about CCJ?

Question

Marriage ended. Husband seeing someone whilst we are still living together. I just cant cope with it. My instinct is just to walk out and get my own place but we have a mortgage. I work in the finance industry in debt recovery (ironically). I am scared that if I go the house will inedevitably get repoed (therefore incurring a CCJ) and I will be sacked!!

House is going up for sale in the next couple of days. Husband refuses to stop seeing new woman until house is sold. I have tried to live with it but cant.

Have no freinds I can go to as they all have young babies.. Have my things (my piano, my cat) that I am afriad he wil either hurt or destroy them if I leave the address.

What would you do?

Answer 1

I would contact a lawyer immediately.  File for separation or divorce .

Stay there until the house is sold.  When I divorced my husband for cheating I could not put him out of the marital house because both our names were on it.

So for almost 1 1/2 years  we lived together while he was still seeing the other woman. But once the divorce was final I obtained an emergency hearing and had him put out.  I took a second job and paid every bill pertaining to the house.  

But for me it was cheaper then selling it and moving in an apartment. I had a son and daughter which meant I would have had to have a 3 bedroom apartment which cost me more then the mortgage.

Do not leave the house until you talk to a lawyer.  See if there is family or a friend that will store your piano and take care of your cat until you get this resolved.  If they can't then put the piano in storage and try to find your cat a good home.  Better then worrying if he will harm it.

Call a lawyer today.  Put your mind at ease. Once you start the procedure he is limited as to what he can do.  If you stay in the home and married to him he can pretty much sell everything, destroy it like you said and not be held responsible because he is your husband.  Once you file for a divorce anything he destroys or sells he will be responsible for giving you half.  

Make an appointment with a lawyer today.  I know it is hard believe me but its not as hard as losing everything you worked hard for not to mention if the house does get repossesed your credit will be shot and it will be years until you can purchase another home.

Best of luck.

Answer 2

Rent an apartment or someones basement for cheap (and take the cat with you).  Take with you your personal belongings and whatever else he will allow you to take with-out a fight (try to be an adult for your sanity) and take pictures of everything else.  

As to the worry over the house, well I'm not sure how much the mortgage is.  If it is that big of a deal, go get your mail (you still have the house key) and make the payment on your own and have him pay for the other "bills" (cell phone, cable tv, car payments etc.).  At the worst, if he doesn't pay the electricty bill than he is the one with-out power.

Answer 3

I THINK FOR MY SANINTY I WOULD PACK UP MY THINGS N MY CAT N LEAVE,,LET HIM DEAL WITH IT,,U CAN ALLWAYS GET  A DIFFERENT JOB,,AND JUST KEEP IN TOUCH WITH THE REALTORS WHO IS SELLING YOUR HOME,,TRY TO MAKE SURE HE DOESNT GET  A PENNY,,,PEACE

Answer 4

stop whining poor me can't take it.  so what he is seeing someone else you have separated and only the house is keeping you there so ignore him and his new woman

Answer 5

Find another place anyway. He ended the marriage not you. Material wealth means nothing and that is what you usually end up with after the legals get involved anyway. There will always be another job.

Answer 6

Continue to live there, while all the time, concentrate on getting my own place as soon as possible. Try to avoid contact with him, by going places while he is up, etc. It's not easy to do, but it can be done. Good Luck!!

Answer 7

Play the game with them find you a man to go out with see how he feels.

Answer 8

I'd come hone me later, like go to a show,. movie, support group several times a week. Join a gym. etc. Leave a bit earlier in the AM. Don;t be around him and the house so often. And if there, listen to walkman or  to shut out the world. Go onto this board and give advice, etc. Start to throw away things you don;t want to keep. It Will be over soon enough. Focus ion your npossible future world.

Do take the three day inensive The forum, offered by Landmark Education Corporation. It will put things in perspective, and wiull boomerang you ointop your futre, not your past.

Allow yourself to cry. Write out your feelings and then take them to work and rubbish Thom, never allowing husband to see what you wrote. it is called processing. Also, make sure you eat right and take Tera vitamin C and B complex which is depleted during stressful times.