Need toddler advice from moms please!!!

Question

my two year old step son has been really misbehaving lately.like when i ask him to put a toy back he throws it at me instead. he yells, hits, and spits at me when hes upset. hes acts very mean towards other kids his age.ive talk to him a lot but he doesnt seem to change.i punished him with time outs and naps.should i not do that?or what else can i do? thanks so much!!

Answer 1

It is normal behavior for his age.

If there have been significant changes in his life, it will get worse.

Time outs are good, taking the toy away is good...

Make some of the requests -like putting toys away, a game...sometimes it just needs to be asked different and they buy into it.

Have his dad reinforce that it is not ok to behave this way.

Answer 2

Start taking away the toys that he throws, put them in a box up high and everytime he throws one, it goes in the box until he can prove that he will not do it again.

As for the hitting and such, time-outs, or remove him from the situation all together if you see that he is getting irritated.

At this age, he cannot express himself in words, and hitting is the only way to show that he is angry or frustrated.

Have patience yourself, if you get upset it will only fuel him.

Answer 3

I also have a 2 yr old whom is going through this same phase. He seems very angry , even outraged, over basically nothing at all. I have found that he does this more when he is over tired. I think you should have your kiddo taking a daily nap whether he is "good" or not. I wouldn't use it as punishment.

I also have started to take note of the things that really set my boy off. The # one thing is when he wants to control the situation. For instance: He wants to help get his milk from the fridge... or he wants to choose which shorts to put on. If I choose for him he flips out. SO i let him help... make a game out of it... and give him 2 options so he can choose.  This has helped tremndously!!

One last thing- I would not allow him to misbehave. Use time-outs consistently.... I have to take my son to his room and put up the baby gate. He goes for 2 min every time he spits, hits, bite ... etc...  we did this for about 2 weeks - he must have gone to timeouts every 10 minutes during that time. But we broke him of those habits.  Don't get me wrong... he still has his fits but he doesn't do harm to others. and when he is simply crying - I just ignore him and he stops after about 5 minutes.

Be firm, explain everything to him, and be consistent!! It will get better.  

Answer 4

Be really strict and consistent with things that are serious- there's no excuse for hitting and throwing. Time out is the best thing, pediatricians warn against spanking.

He may have control issues. Whenever possible, give him two or three choices. Do you want to wear the blue shirt or the green? Do you want cheese or a banana? It's amazing how that helps.

Check out Supernanny, I love her methods.

Good luck!

PS: using a nap as a punishment only teaches him to hate going to bed. if you're at the end of your rope, stick him in the playpen and walk away. we've all had to do it.