Nervous about becoming the mother of two. Any advice?

Question

I already have a 4-year-old son. My second son is due in about three weeks. What I am concerned about: being able to find time to rest. Let me explain my situation and you'll understand...

My husband only has 8 days of paid vacation left and plans to use them in order to help me out once our son is born. However, after the time is all used up...he plans to go back to work because we are living on only his salary. When this happens, he won't be able to get up at night to help with the baby (he gets up at 5:30 AM to be at work at 7:00 AM-3:00 PM).

I know a lot of magazines and books say to get help from family and friends...but both of my parents are disabled and cannot help out because their health. My mother-in-law can't help because she has health issues too and her dog doesn't like children. All of my other relatives have day jobs or live in a city 4 hours away. If I'm up several times at night with the baby and up all day with my 4-year-old, when do I get to rest??

Answer 1

my daughter is 3 years old and my son is 6 old and im due in 6 months,  my mom n law lives to far from us and my mom has heath pro   my husband has to be at work at 6- gets off at 3- then has to do alot of stuff,  ive been makeing it with the 2 kids under 3 ! im sure you will be fine,   4 years old is a great age,  im going to have 3 kids under 3 and a half :) and we planed all (3)  just enjoy the new "baby" they grow up so fast, this baby is due in feb 16 -and my 23 bday is feb 15 i hope he/she is born on my bday!

Answer 2

Are you putting your four year old in preschool. I am single mom. I don't know how long my mom plan to take off. I do have a four year and a six year old. My four year old be in preschool in the morning and my oldest be in all day (first grade). I am due during the school year. I be resting in the morning with the baby when my youngest in preschool. When the baby napping in the afternoon I be spending alone time with my four year old so he still getting his attention he needs. If you can go to bed early. And your husband can stay up with the baby if it was wake . I probably go to bed when I know the baby be sleeping good couple of hours during the night.

Answer 3

What I did was let my son sleep with us and I breastfed. In less then a week it becomes very easy to do it while still laying in bed barely awake. I would actually sleep through feedings. You would be amazed the little guys know what to do :)

You will probably still have to groggily get up and do one diaper changing at night, but really if you let your baby sleep with you and you breastfeed he will sleep through the night. You won't be up several times a night with a baby who is securely sleeping with mom and dad.

I think the biggest challenge will be the 4 year old son, that's an age where jealously may play a difficult part. Task your young son to be Mommy's helper, even things as simple as grabbing mommy the baby wipes,  and lay the praise on thick for being such a wonderful big brother.

I cannot stress enough how much easier it makes life for the new mom having the new baby sleep with you. I know alot of baby books preach against it. But I have always felt it is the most natural thing to do. I mean really what other mammal leaves their new off spring unattended unless completely necessary besides humans? I predator could eat them- babies who sleep safely between their parents don't wake up and cry at night.