New baby in the family what to do?

Question

my friend just had a little girl she is about two weeks old now. her older daughter is taking it hard now. she is getting ready for preschool this tuesday. mom is having a hard time too cause the big sister wants all of mommies time when she should be resting and baby has her nights and days messed up so she is not getting much sleep and baby is colic she thinks i can help on the baby part that is how my son was i just don't know about the big sister. i was the baby in my family so i am at a lost here. help please. from both me and mom.

Answer 1

I would suggest that the older child be included as much as possible with the baby's care. This will let her know that she is not being replaced and that she can be a big helper. Some children have a harder time with this than other. My sisters children are two years apart and when the second was born we would have her older sister help. She would get the diaper and wipes or help hold the babies bottles. It helped a great deal. Also might want to consider have someone come sit with the baby for an hour or some each week so that the mom is able to give some special attention to the older child.

Answer 2

the best advice i have to give is to just try and inclued the "older" daughter in taking care of the baby. let her help you feed the baby (to whatever extent possible)... have her get you a diaper when you are changing the baby, let her pick out the outfit for the baby. just try and include the older one as much as possible. and when the baby is sleeping, take even 10-15 mins to sit down alone with the older one and read a story or do some colouring. just let her know that you still care about her alot and that she is needed and loved.

Answer 3

I have an 8 month (next week he turns 8 months) boy, a 6 year old step daughter and a 9 year old daughter.

The 6 year old is extremely demanding of my time, so I would get her to help me out with looking after the baby.  "Could you please get mummy a nappy" etc, that kind of thing.  She was getting some attention, and felt like mummy's helper.  It made a big difference and helped bridge the gap her jealousy was making between her and my son.

I would definitely adivse that your friend give this a go. Also, by setting aside a little time each day when the bubs is asleep to spend just with her daughter would be very helpful.  Even if it was just to read a book together for 15 minutes, that will definitely help!

You could probably take the pre-schooler to the shop for an ice cream, or to the playground.  Something where it is just her getting the attention every now and then also.  Remember to call her "big sister" and tell her she's doing a good job being mummy's helper.  This will make her feel important, and will also help stem her jealousy.

Best of luck to your friend and her family :)

Answer 4

She'll just have to ride it out. Swaddling may help the new baby, as well as using a bottle like Dr. Brown's if she's bottle fed. Also, keeping lights on and making noise during the day helps baby adjust her night and day schedule. At night when things are quiet and dark, she'll see she can sleep after a few days. Spend a lot of one on one time with the older child--have friends, Dad, Grandma spend time with the baby so the toddler gets that Mommy time that she craves at the moment.  

Answer 5

Babysit the toddler for your friend.  She will love you for it!