Nice to a kid or Lose reputation???

Question

Last year at the end of my 7th grade year, a kid(lets just say he was not so popular) asked me out. I of course told him the truth that I can't date until I'm 16. He took the news fine and all, but people started teasing him and he begged me to tell them that I would have said yes. I just told him I was sorry. Well....last week(not lying) he asked me out 5 times. I kept making up excuses until I got annoyed, I told him I would ask my mom. I was pretty mean because I had my friend pretend to be my mom and we called him. He knew the conversation i had with "my mom" by asking her if I could go out with him was fake. He didn't really care but then today he told me the reason he liked me was because I was the only "pretty girl" who was nice to him. I feel really bad because I knew deep down inside, I wasn't very nice because I didn't want to lose my reputation and my mom makes me be nice to everyone. Now school is starting the 25th and I'm scared he'll try to hang out with me and I'm not the most popular kid in the school but I have quite a few people who respect me. If I'm nice to him, I will get teased but I don't want to hurt his feelings. How can I do both?? BTW...he's totally in love with me because he asked me today if he could be my first bf when I'm 16. I just told him...well looks like you called dibs. I bet he'll find someone else by then, just adding details.

Answer 1

if your friends are teasing this guy in front of you, say something like you know he has  has pretty nice eyes or he's actually really nice when you get to know him and then your friends will start saying nicer things and noticing him a bit more.

or you could give him a bit of a makeover change his style up a bit

give him a chance, if you don't think of the outcomes, he could be a famous star when his older or everyone might start to like him and he could always think of you as a girl who he wasn't good enough for.i hoped i helped(:

If you like him which i think you do give it a go

Answer 2

Tell him you don't dislike him but you don't want to go out with him.  If he then wants to be your friend and you'd prefer not to, then tell him you have nothing in common or that you already have a group of friends and don't want more.  It's going to burst his bubble but it's more kind to set him straight now than later.  Don't be too sweet about it, just be as honest as you can without being mean or leaving him hoping when there is no hope for a relationship with you.

Answer 3

Well honesty is probably best.

If you want know him, then talk to him and let him hang around, if people comment, then back yourself up, it's stupid that people will judge another person just because they hang out with someone "uncool"

If you genuinely have no interest in knowing him, then you have to tell him that you don't really want to know him.

Answer 4

First off.....ask yourself this....(taking thoughts of your friends and what your mother wants of you out of the equation)

What do you really think of this boy? Do you even like him as a person? Is he a nice person? I don't mean b/f material....just is he a nice person at heart?

The second question you should ask yourself....

Is it really respect you think you are getting from your friends if they will treat you this way? Is this what respect really is if they would treat you this way just b/c a boy is infatuated with you or is it just good old teasing?

Would you ever go out with this kind of boy....not thinking of what you mother wants of you and especially not what your friends will say?

If it is no.....you wouldn't go out with him...you need to tell him as nicely as possible that you will not go out with him and don't make up excuses about why. Jus let him know that it is true that your mother won't let you date until 16 but even then if he asked again, you wouldn't date him then b/c he's just not your type ....but remember...time can change a person's looks a personality....but tell him the truth nicely.

If you do like him for who he is then I would say go for it. It's just plain wrong to make a deciding factor like this based upon what other people think. I mean, if those are your friends, they are your friends regardless of who you date. Remember, if it is teasing in good nature then that's fine  but if it's in mean spirit....then I would suggest really rethinking what friendship really means to you and what respect actually means to you.

It doesn't matter how many friends you have in life....if they can't respect you about the decisions you make then are they truely your friends???? I mean, friends will always have opinions of what their friends do but when it comes down to it; they should respect your decision and let you be. You need to be you and not be the folllower in your life but be the leader of your life...except when it comes to your parents! lol ;p

In the end, just be you...not what your friends expect of you and not b/c your mom wishes you to be nice to everyone...which is ok...but don't let everyone else cloud your judgement of who and what you stand for in life.

Answer 5

And why do you care what other people think. Comn', you could miss somebody who can be very special in your life. Being popular is not everything. Girls and school clique these days. Just be who you are, popular or not.

Answer 6

  Tell him the whole truth, that your mom makes you be nice to everybody.  Tell him as to date, there are no guys that you have met that I want to go out with yet.  Tell him you like him but you don't feel any chemistry, no attraction in that way.  Hopefully he will understand that.

Answer 7

just break it to him, tell him nothing is ever gonna happen between you and him, your gonna have to break a few hearts in your lifetime

Answer 8

who cares what others think u decide who u like based on who they are not what some others think

Answer 9

ok well my friend kinda had the same thing...but last year i was in 7th grade and at the end of the year i was friends with a bunch of 6th graders now my rep is totaly wrecked and its going to suck going back to school...so like dont ruin your rep...it sucks

Answer 10

don't lie and tell him you would go out with him if you wouldn't but if you would don't be afraid to say so. If you don't like him that way or want to be friends then don't worry about what others think. Besides the people worth having as friends will respectvyou even more.:]

Answer 11

If you don't like him cuz you don't like him, you just have to let him down gently. This sounds exactly like me in middle school on two separate occasions. You have to say "Sorry but I don't see you like that." You can still be nice and talk to him and stuff, but just as long as you made it clear that it is a strictly friends relationship. That way, you don't have to date who you don't want to date, and you can still be a nice person. You're going to hurt him, but this just makes it as minimal as possible.

Answer 12

don't date him if you dont like him i profer not to lose rep tho trust me in hight skool ull need it

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