Night out with large group. What's the etiquette for paying the bill?

Question

I'm going along to an evening (dinner) with a large group of people - most of whom I never talk to and who don't talk to me. I'm teetotal and the other people who I hope will be on my table are too generally. Must we therefore subsidize the boozers when the bill arrives? It could add another £5 to £10 on top of the set price. It always feels so unfair and I resent it. Can we ask to have the bill just for our table? Any nice way of getting out of it? Or must I just accept it (albeit grudgingly)?

Answer 1

I went out with the girls last week and I drove so I was the non drinker but I still insisted we split the bill as I can never be bothered to do a break down, however the best thing you can do is ask to have a bar bill separately or if you are on separate tables have separate bills for food too. Remember though, soft drinks, coffees etc all add up to.

Answer 2

yes i would only wish to pay for what i had consumed and no more!

Answer 3

Go to the bathroom right before the bill comes.

Or take a good supply of different bills, and liberally throw out what will cover your food, drink, tax, and tip, and leave it at that.  If anyone says anything tell them what you had and how much it was and how what you put out more than covers it.

Answer 4

We inform the wait staff up front  that separate bill are required.  I always hand my tip to the waitress, since I tip 20% and cannot stand when some cheapo at the table combines my tip with their measly two bucks.

Answer 5

There is nothing wrong with stating your going to pay for your own bill!  Just make sure it's known EARLY.. Like before you sit down!  

if they ask why say i'm sorry i know it's normal to split the bill but i'm tapped right now so i'm not even drinking and keeping my bill lighter then all of us splitting! Say something like i wasn't going to go but this will let me go!

or do a double split!  add up all drinks on one end and whom ever drinks split that and then all the food get's split like normal!

Talk about it with the group! They are the ones you need a response from not us!

Answer 6

I used to be on the side of just paying your part of the bill but what always happens is that people never include the taxes, drink, or tip.  I've organized quite a few events and more often than not someone who orders a meal for $9.95 will pitch in $10 and think that they have paid up even though they probably should've put in $15.

I found the best solution is to to get the menu for the restaurant you will be going to and having everyone select the entre and/or drinks beforehand so that you can calculate in the tip, taxes accordingly.  This works especially well if you are all chipping in a free meal for a person.  I usually send out an email with a spreadsheet outlining what everyone owes so that there is no confusion.  It's a bit of work but it's much better then being $20 or $30 short when the bill arrives.

Answer 7

I understand.  And sympathize.  If you're going to be forced to split a bill with people who are drinking alcohol, make sure it's clear up front -- before you order the crab cakes, lobster/prime rib special and the parfait de luxe for dessert.  But have fun.

Answer 8

Well, I'd say speak up for one, let peeps know how you see the matter.  (After all, it is your money)... and I'd bring cash.  Once you've hit your limit, you can say - "hey, I've only got 10bucks" (yeah I'm an american LOL)  "dude..."

:-)   Cash and stick to your guns, chances are you aren't the only one that feels this way.

Answer 9

Normally the group would agree before the bill comes as to how they are paying.  I.e. just split the bill or pay for what you have.  Personally I would just pay for what I had had as most people tend to drink more than I have.

Answer 10

Get so drunk you forget to pay altogether

Answer 11

I too am a non drinker and on works outings, generally people have been very kind and not added the alcohol onto my share.  The food has generally been split equally between everyone, and the alcohol with the rest of the group.  The other alternative is for everyone to pay for what they had.  This usually means someone taking charge and checking what everyone has had.  Do speak up about not wanting to pay for alcohol though, as it is unfair (especially as it can be so expensive!)