No longer a virgin but waiting till marriage?

Question

I lost my virginity at 18yrs old...to a total jerk. I'm single now and am tired of all of these guys just trying to get into my pants. I've made the decision to NOT have s*x with anyone, until I am married. I figured it would be a good way to weed out all of the guys looking to date a girl just to get laid.

Do you think that it's stupid to want to wait till marriage, since I'm already not a virgin?

Does anybody understand my reasoning here?

My first time was awful and I think everyone deserves a second chance to do things over.

I am currently single but dating the most wonderful guy who understands and respects my decision, saying that he would be willing to wait for me. I just wanted some opinions.

Answer 1

Your reasoning makes perfect sense, and as long as it works for you and your boyfriend, I see no problem with it at all. Good luck to you!

Answer 2

i think its totally okay. u realized that it was a mistake and want to wait for that special person until u decided to do it again.

Answer 3

if you found your man then whats the problem

Answer 4

Your having had s*x before has nothing to do with whether you decide to have it in the future.

Answer 5

not stupid ... but not good for you ..

life is beautiful .. and short as well !!!!

Answer 6

Of course it isn't stupid.

Its your choice, if thats what you want and think is for the best, good for you.

Answer 7

no its smart. u realized ur mistake and youre learning from it.

Answer 8

Its totally alright!

You can really fall in love with a person even when its not physical

Answer 9

s*x is actually an important part of marriage. it can truely make or break it. i think it is not a smart idea to marry someone you never sleep with. i dated a super sweet guy once for a few months, after sleeping with him i dumped him...don't want to spend forever with a bad lay.

Answer 10

u r doing the right thing

Answer 11

To be honest it doesn't sound stupid at all. Your decision makes total sense and in all honesty it is a good one. Your right its a good way to weed out those who like you for you and those who just want to get laid. So good luck.  

Answer 12

i think that is a good decision... i am looking for the same thing in a girl.  I dont like relationships that revolve around s*x.

Answer 13

way to go

Answer 14

thats a great idea and im happy you have someone now that supports your choice. good luck

Answer 15

It's your decision, and I think whatever you feel in your mind is best. I think it's a good idea you're starting over, because yes, everyone does deserve a second chance. And congrats to finding that special guy that will actually wait for you ;)

Answer 16

Yes! Wait for marriage. Think of it as a second chance. Then when you have s*x with your future husband, you will be having s*x with someone you love for the first time.....which is better (I promise)

Answer 17

I think that your decision is 100% valid and honorable! I am very proud of you!  You will face some hard times in your decision, but stay strong! Some guys won't stick it out, but that's better for you, you know what kind of guy they are if they leave you!  Some guys will try really hard to convince you to let your promise to yourself go. I guarantee that the guy who stands behind your personal decision is a keeper. Every day is a new day, a fresh start. You don't need to explain yourself to these guys, and I wouldn't even tell them about losing your virginity to a loser. When the right man comes along, you will share an awesome experience together and no hurt will come of it! It is nice to hear that there are still wholesome girls out there!  

Answer 18

its called second abstinence.

and the guy you're dating sounds like he loves you considering he is waiting.

Answer 19

I think its a great idea... my wife and i did the same thing... neither one of us were virgins... both had bad relationships in the past... it sounds weird but guys also get pressured for just s*x... so we vowed to wait and we did... its hard but as long as your boyfriend is understanding it will be worth the wait... also you will learn so much more about each other... meaningless s*x only complicates things

Answer 20

No! You're making a wonderful decision. It's called celibacy.

& I'm glad you know that he was a jerk and that loads of men are just looking for one thing...

All the power to you, girl!

Answer 21

well it's normal for guys to be horn dogs and making a guy wait till marriage is pretty far out there, and if you do do that and then after you're married find out you're sexually incompatible or he's got a micro-p***s or impotent then what? It might be good to tell guys that to see who runs but actually taking it that far doesnt' sound lik a good idea imo.

Answer 22

That's really sweet of you!

I think that's a great idea and not stupid! :)

x

Answer 23

no it not stupid at all. In high school (catholic) we read this book by this lady called Molly Kelly she talked about chasity in it and said theirs a thing called second virginity its were you have already lost your 1st virginity but you now get a second chance. all you have to do is commit to it and make the decision she said.

and just to let you know that day i decided to make the decision to become a secondary  virgin along with some of my other friends. So good luck to you.

Answer 24

I think it's a wonderful Idea!

I plan to lose my virginity when I get married, not before, but I think you're idea is the same anyways.

It does show you who's serious, and who's not, you know?

Well i'm glad your current man accepts your decision, and I hope you can keep and maintain that relationship.

:]

Answer 25

I think thats a very admirable thing to do and its even cooler that you have found a guy that is ok with that.  It is not stupid at all to want to wait if you are ok with it.  Everyone makes mistakes that they later regret.  At least you have learned from yours and are working to do the right thing.  If you can last till marriage good for you.

Answer 26

I think that is a very smart answer. I myself am waiting until marriage. Having s*x creates emotional ties for a couple, it's an intimate way to express your love for one another. And even though you already lost your virginity, that doesn't make it stupid for you to choose to wait now. You are the same person that you were back then, and it's your heart that matters. Guard your heart, and keep it safe until you meet the one you love. There is a thing called second virginity, and I think you are incredibly smart for making the decision you've made. <3

CJ

Answer 27

that sounds GREAT!=]...im serious, and he sounds like a really great guy to respect ur decision like that and wait for you. overall i think ur making a good choice!:)

Answer 28

I think you should do what you feel is the best for you.  It is awesome that you've found a guy who is willing to wait for you.  Throw titles aside and have s*x when you feel you are ready and have found someone that you love and are comfortable with.  

Answer 29

idk y other guys do that its f****n dumb i c y u would want to wait

Answer 30

I think it's a great idea.

=]

Answer 31

It's smart. You made a mistake that you regret and you are right it is weeding out those who are after something that's no good and plus it's  a big ticket to finding someone great for yourself. You did find someone who sounds wonderful

You are also indicating that you have self respect

Don't be ashamed, you are wise.