OMG! Pesky horse eating leprechauns .?

Question

HELP!!!!!! Its been a dry summer and now we are overrun with HELs in business suits!!! The best tailored ones are most dangerouse. What can I dooo? They are running in packs. I have a bunch in Yves St Laurent here now... please help!!!

Answer 1

There's only one way to get rid of those little blighters. You need to bait some leprechaun traps. Tie up a horse in an empty paddock. Right in the middle. The second one of them comes over you blow it's lousy head off. I should know I've been in Ireland all my life.  

Answer 2

Please calm down. I understand your concern. This is a very dangerous situation. I think I can help.

The best course of action is to take a pair of scissors.

Quietly sneak up behind them.

Grab them by their ties. Usually they are silk ties and very expensive.

Take the scissors and cut the ties in half.

This frightens and upsets them causing them to panic and run.

Once you have cut several ties, you take the pieces and string them up around your property.

This is like the leprechaun version of counting coup and will serve as both a reminder and effective deterrent against future HEL attacks.

I hope I've helped.

Answer 3

Its Ok this has happened to me before!!!

What you need to do first is disguise your horse!!

Attach one of those sets of rabbit ears that you get for easter to the top of their halters,  Do anything you can to change their phsical appearance.

Secondly you need to disguise the horses scent/ smell, ( HELs are the opposite to the Trex , bad eyesite but good scense of smell, I find that soaking my Border collie's in the bath tub for 15 mins and scooping the water into a big spray bottle and applying liberally will do the trick, No one wants to get to close to anything that smells like wet dog!!!

And lastly HELs have good hearing and a horse's whinny and snort are very distinctive so if you can, I would recomend attaching a tape recorder around your horses neck with a recording that plays over and over saying,

ARRR, POLLY WANNA CRACKER???? p**s OFF YA SLIMEY LEPRECHAUNS!!!! ARRRR!!!!!!!

That should do the trick, If all else fails, Just stand outside with a shotgun............ Or up the dosage on your medication... LOL

GOODLUCK!!!

Answer 4

First of all, put all your bottles of Jack away.  Secondly, put the pills all down the toilet.

Next:  Put a BIG pot of coffee on and start drinking.

When all the little men and critters disapear, then you're ready to go back and see the world.

Answer 5

My usual answer to a question like this ( love these questions)

My answer is:  I'll have what your having, only not quite as much.

Answer 6

YSL isn't so bad.  It's the ones in Vuitton you have to worry about...

I think we need to wait til See Arr Harr sees this.  She knows what to do with those leprechauns.

Answer 7

LOL LOL LOL

Answer 8

ur bluffing a leprechaun  only eats me gold schillings because iam a leprechaun.

Answer 9

Just take their lucky charms and run far far away!

I can see it now......

"They be stealin' me lucky charms!"