Of these two stances on marriage... which do you have?

Question

I think, if you do intend to get married at some point, there are two main ways to look at it.

1) When you get married, you have proof (a ring and parchment) that states another person loves you and is dedicated to you. It makes you feel more stable in your relationship - you don't have to worry about the other person leaving.

2) You would only considering marrying someone with which you already have a relationship where you feel that the other person would never leave.

Which of these two most represents your stance on getting married (assuming you would even get married)?

Answer 1

2.

Since when is a "ring and parchment" a chastity belt?

Answer 2

2) I am married, and it was a celebration of our love, and the fact we are officially family.

Answer 3

Neither really, but if I had to pick one it would be the second one.  Marriage means much more to me than your two options.

Answer 4

Well I guess I should start out by saying that I don't think about the concept of 'leaving' when I think of marriage.  I'm not an idealist, but I believe that marriage is alot more than having a guaranteed partner!

Given only those two choice, though, I would choose the second.  I wouldn't dream of marrying someone so that they would be tied to me - I married because I wanted to build a life together.  We didn't need to be married, but we decided that it would honour our commitment more...so we did it.

Answer 5

Neither. You have to love the person you are going to marry. The paper does not mean much in today's world- it is just paper. People don't care about wedding rings anymore.

If he loves me then he loves me. I am married but not because I needed the security of a piece of paper.

Answer 6

Both.  Number two would have to occur first,  for number one to happen.  Though number two is far more important, number one is simply for legalities and rights as a married couple as well as a symbol to you and others that you are committed to your relationship.

Answer 7

The second.  My first marriage (a disaster) would have been (1). My second marriage (28 years and counting) is more like (2).

Answer 8

The second one.  A piece of paper really doesn't mean that much.

Answer 9

I don't think "never leaving" is the actual consideration, whatever the proof. I think the consideration is to be with someone you would like to make a life with. When two people have a common goal for a lifetime, leaving is not as much an issue.

Answer 10

Second...the ring and paper are worthless without the second reasoning.

The rings pretty, but I could get myself one if I wanted to.

The paper is just a contract, and like all contracts it's easily broken.

Answer 11

The second one

Answer 12

The second one

I won't marry someone I have doubts about or think won't WILLINGLY be there through thick and thin!

Answer 13

2. Neither a ring nor a parchment is any guarantee. It never has been before.