Oh no...he hates school already???

Question

How do I get my son excited for SK? He was kept home for JK because I debated on homeschooling but I have finally gave in a registered him in a school for september. No matter what I say to Jasper over the past few weeks: Jasper acts like school is going to be the worst thing ever.

I tried talking to him and telling him about all the fun stuff he will do and the friends he can make but he still gets in these little "stages of anger" where he shouts at me that he will not go. Hes going to be 5 in september. I am confused becuase he was excited and now I have only 2 months to get him organsized or the first day will be h**l on earth. Its already hard enough for me knowing that time is coming and he is not making it any easier.

Any ideas on how to inspire him about school or get him excited to go; at least to the point where he is not yelling at me...oh and has anyone else expeierenced this with their kids?

Answer 1

Dont talk about it anymore. He's just acting out cause he knows it gets you. And if he raised his voice at me,  I would swat his little ***! You talk as if he was grown and he's only four. You dont let children talk back.

Answer 2

He will get over it. School is the right move for him. He will be better socially adapted, and will have a strengthened emune system.

Good luck, he will like it in the end.

Answer 3

well YOU didnt really want him to go to school right? he senses that, dont worry once he starts he'll have fun, maybe plan a special "school day" so when he gets home after his first day you do something special like go to the zoo and tell him about that.

Answer 4

Just leave it alone for awhile....dont mention it for a couple weeks, then when the time gets closer let him be involved in picking his school supplies and clothes...buy a special outfit for the first day.  Call the school and see if you can go in before school actually starts and meet the teacher and see the classroom.  If he continues to have the fits, just tell him calmly that it isnt a choice and he HAS to go.

My son is going into 2nd grade....he went to pre-k, kindergarten, and the first half of 1st grade loving school...so much that when he was sick he would get mad that he had to stay home...then after christmas break this past year he suddenly started not wanting to go to school....I had to take him there, and sometimes the principal and teachers would have to drag him in kicking and screaming.  It was hard but it was what had to be done....he had to know that school was not a choice, but a responsibility.  We also made a chart for him and when he went to school without a fit and/or had a good day at school he earned stars...which in return earned him prizes...it worked!!!  He cant wait for school to start.

Its hard to let our children suffer and it is only natural to want to comfort them when they are upset, but they have to learn that some things in life are not an option, but a responsibility and that we all do things every day that we dont particularly want to do, but thats part of life....just stay strong while reinforcing your love for him.....try to make it as exciting as possible...and DONT let him see that he is getting to you.....walk away and show your emotions...I cant tell you how many days I drove away from the school crying, but it had to be done and worked out for the best.

Good luck!!!!

Answer 5

The problem is, parents feel that children really don't need them and at that magic kindergarten age, they need to go off to school and branch out on their own.  This isn't true.  Children really need you for the rest of your life...and beyond.  He doesn't want to leave you and forcing him to do it isn't very good for him.  Many mothers do it thinking they are doing the right thing for their children, not realizing what the child is going through.  Reconsider home schooling.  He will get a much better education, he can socialize at home school groups and any sports or whatever you want to get him involved in (which does not interfere with the school day, thus a better education), and you aren't devastating him by dropping him off.

Answer 6

He is just scared and unsure of what is going to happen. Im sure he will be fine after school starts and it may even take a wk or two but he will be fine. Thats normal.

Answer 7

It may be that he doesn't have an internal 'picture' or concept of what 'school' actually is. Does he have any friends or siblings or cousins who are already there? Could he go there at the end of a day to meet them, so that he begins to build an idea in his mind of what it looks like, and where it is, in relation to home - maybe practise the walk to school, and point out other children who may be carrying interesting-looking paintings and models, or lunchboxes. There are also some good books to share. You could look at these together, and then leave them within reach for him to revisit (when he thinks you are not looking!)

Once you have 'planted' these images, perhaps, as another answerer has suggested, you should ease off talking about it for a few weeks. His angry outbursts might be his way of saying it's all a bit too much too soon.

Once he starts, you may or may not have a problem. Then you will be able to think a bit more about what exactly you hope he will gain from it all. As long as you are upbeat and resolute about your decision, and continue to have lots of fun things to do after school and at weekends, I bet he will settle quite quickly.