Ok All Men ..Need help disciplining 8 yr old boy and 6 yr old girl ..dad does not help always working ...?

Question

occasionaly he intercepts but not alot untill I yell for help and tell him to deal w/ it And not untill his ex calls for help almost crying too.... these children need help... were seperated from dad because mother took them.. They are totally spoiled rotten and being the step mom they do not listen to me at all ( or even their real mother for that fact ) I do not spank them Nor does he ... I am tired of yelling about ready to give up seriously !!!!!!!

Answer 1

I think spankings can be a valuable disciplinary tool.  First, remind the child that behaviour is wrong, and not to do it again.  Second time it happens, remind again, and state there will be a spanking if it happens again.  Third time, go straight to the spanking.  Do not spank if you are angry, or not in control of yourself.  Afterwards, remind your child you love them, and part of that love, is enforcing rules and boundaries.  Also, correct any misbehaviour as soon as it happens.  

Another good technique is the naughty step.  Simply remove your child to a place apart from everyone else when misbehaviour occurs.  They will soon learn that you mean business.

Don't make rules you can't enforce everytime.

Don't make threats you won't follow through on.

The first person to raise their voice in an argument invariably loses; don't let it be you.

Answer 2

Well, for a start, try throwing away the story books that has the evil step mother things.

Secondly, try being a friend and not as a parent can help to build a relationship with them. Spanking is NEVER an option and great, you didn't. Yelling at them is not advised.

Thirdly, know them inside out prevent misunderstanding between you and them. knowing the reasons behind every actions helps to clear the air.

Last but not least, once in a blue moon, use presents to recongise their efforts and bring them out shows that you care.

It's a long way BUT when a child calls you mummy, you will know it's all worth it !

Answer 3

You need to stop yelling and start talking.  Daddy needs to be the main disciplinarian in this situation.  Step Mom should not be doing it.  However, you also can't have the kids disrespecting you or your home or each other.  Start time out or sending them to their rooms.  Perhaps grounding them or taking away a privilege would be more appropriate depending on their ages.  

Have you ever watch Super Nanny on TV.  She is very good with her methods.  It was on tonight where I live in Maryland.  

Anyway, you need to be consistent and Dad needs to back you up.  However, it should really be him that does the bulk of this.

Answer 4

Do you know that a lot of women know how to discipline, not just men!

It sounds like none of you have any idea on how to look after children.  You need to contact a local health professional and get them to book you in for a group parenting class.  If you all go then you'll learn the same ideas and will know that each parent is enforcing the rules.

Answer 5

Do NOT make Dad the one who does all the disciplining! That will make the kids grow up to HATE or fear him! Make them stop IMMEDIATELY, don't wait for anything to happen first. Do not threaten to do it, DO IT! If you say you will do something if they do something then DO IT! They are brats now because of inconsistent parents. Once they KNOW that you mean it then they will listen to you. Be completely consistent in how you react and how you punish them. Stop waffling over things, they are taking advantage of that. Consistency is where it is at. DO IT!  

Answer 6

There dad can cure this in acouple of minutes.

He should put them both over his knee

and give them ta well deserved spanking.

Answer 7

First, talk to your husband about EXACTLY what the rules are, then write them down and post them all over the house.  Let the children know what exactly to expect as a result of violating the rules.  Then, you have to enforce them consistently.  Be matter-of-fact about it, no yelling or screaming, just enforce it, it's now the law of the house.  If you have a working relationship with their mother, you can let her know what rules you've decided on, and perhaps she will use them too.  Children need to know where they stand and what they can't do unless they want to face the consequences.  If you are consistent, they will decide whether breaking the rules is worth it to them.  They've already had enough changes to deal with, now they need consistency and lots of love and patience.  Obviously, it's up to you to start it.