Ok....so I already asked if it's rude to say no kids on the invitations for my wedding....?

Question

But now there is another dilemma!!!! My siblings will be part of the court and they are helping me with some stuff, but they all have kids. And well they are going to be part of the wedding as well. Not all of them, but 2 of them. So they will be at the wedding. I was thinking to have kids of the immediate family....HELP PLEASE!!!!!!

Answer 1

It's really hard to do that. If you tell other people that they cannot bring their kids, yet they see kids at the wedding, they are going to be insulted. I think that you need to invite all or none.

You can have the children participate in the ceremony, but then have an adult only reception. I think only inviting kids from the immediate family will cause some problems...

Answer 2

I think its rude because almost everyone has kids.  Some people don't like to go where their kids are not welcome.  Your guest list may be cut in half.

Answer 3

Well, regardless, it's rude to invite someone to something and then dictate what they can and can not do. However, if some of your guests get baby sitter's to attend ($$) and then arrive and there are other people's children there, they'll probably be upset. So, unless you're planning a fully formal black tie event, I'd allow the youngsters, or add something cheeky like "Well behaved children are welcome" to let the parents know (subtly) that you don't want the kids running wild.

Answer 4

I think that regardless of if its your families children or not if you are not going to allow children at the reception than NO children should be there.  Because this could cause conflict.

If you want to be able to have your families children at the reception than I think that ALL children should be allowed as well.  Not everyone will bring their children; and for those who will I think that you should have things for the children to do.

At my reception I had a coloring table for the children and it was great!!!  No kids were running around or shouting, because they had something to do.

Have a wonderful wedding!

Answer 5

Its ok to have kids of the immediate family only. Draw the line there, and everyone will understand.

If you extend it to some cousins kids, or your friends kids, but not some others, then the line is not clear and someone will be upset.

Answer 6

Maybe you could hire a babysitter (or more, depending of the quantity of kids) and reserve a small area just to them - there they would be "controlled" and at least not running around;

or to make a wedding by night and include a note in the invitations like "don't forget to appoint the babysitter for the evening, because the party will be all night long" (even if you go home at ten...)

Answer 7

I went to a wedding that made that same requests.  Some people's feelings were hurt (including the kids old enough to know they weren't invited), but in the long run it is the bride and groom's day.  What makes it most enjoyable for them is what is most important.  (It was nice that no one was crying during the ceremony or reception).

Answer 8

You cannot come out and say no kids

When my youngest aunt got married in the 60's she had all of the kids to the church and then sent us off with Baby sitters to swim in the family pool and eat KFC.

I was 6 or 7 and this was way better than a stuffy boring reception where you would wear a dress and sit still.

Get your siblings to bring their babysitters somewhere and offer the parents a break

Answer 9

nah I dont think so.

Re-word it:

"Kids welcome (no little s***s.) thanks

Answer 10

I just received an invitation that says

  by request of management

            no children

I wasn't offended at all. But then I'm all for no kids at wedding receptions. I don't mind them at the ceremony.

Answer 11

I don't think it's rude at all. Weddings are incredibly expensive and you certainly can't accommodate what everyone else wants. It is the responsibility of the parent to make sure that their child is cared for properly; not yours and i'm sure that every parent has gone to at least one party without their children before. Some couples try to accommodate their guests children by hiring a babysitter for everyone's kids, which is very nice but not always possible on a budget and certainly not required. I'm not sure if you have a block of rooms reserved at a hotel or not but some hotels do offer babysitting services, something to look into so if guests get stuck you can let them know that it is an option. I have been to many weddings where children were involved in the ceremony as flower girls etc.. but did not come to the reception. Realisticaly most kids are in bed long before the dinner is over anyway.

As for how to word this on the Invitations I have seen two variations.

The invitation is addressed to "Mr & Mrs" or "Mr./Ms. & Guest" and then on the reply card they say "we have reserved 2 seats in your honour" (implying that the invitation is only for those it is addressed to and not to "Mr. Blank & Family")

Or

Written on the invitation near the bottom "Adult Reception"

Keep in mind that bottom line it's you and your future husbands day, no one elses. You will never be able to please everyone, no matter how accomodating you try to be. The best thing to do is to make it the day you and your future husband have always dreamed of.

  

Answer 12

if your really set on having no kids then look into hiring a babysitter or two. they can be in a separate room, still have cake, and the sitters can play games with them. just a thought!

Answer 13

Although it would be rude to say  "No Kids" on the invites, and you only address the invite to the parents name (omit "and family" which would indicate kids are welocme) some people will rsvp that they are bringing their children anyway. And unfortunately, there is not much you can do about it, unless you want to be rude. Mention to yoour immediate family that they are welcome to bring their children, or put Mr. and Mrs. John Smith and Family on the invites so they know that their kids are welcome to come. Most won't bring them uninvited, but you will be suprised with the amount the bring their kids anyhow. Just don't let it stress you out. Go with it, you can't do much about it anyhow.

Answer 14

Kids at weddings are annoying! I'm sorry, I DJ, and they are loud disruptive, and in general should be at home if you are having an open bar celebration.  As far as not being rude, don't say "no kids" say with "an adult reception to follow the ceremony at..." As for your kids, well they are your kids, if you have no alternative then bring them, but still try to avoid them being there after dinner.  

Answer 15

kids make it fun! they are better at big functions than you think

Answer 16

These kids are you Nice's and or nephew's? They are your immediate family and are in the wedding, and those who aren't are still your immediate family. And they should be at the wedding, unless they are really young and need a lot of supervision. There is no question as to why they are there. You still have an adult only reception, And to hire a babysitter for other peoples children is  not called for. That is not your responsibility. You stated no children ,so they should accept that. The only children at the wedding and reception is your siblings children period. Stop agonizing over this. There will be people there who won't like something you do or don't no matter what. Relax!!!!  You will never please everyone. And I hope this the end of this question, stop second guessing yourself.

Answer 17

Children can be very disruptive to a wedding, not to mention that the poor dears are usually bored out of their minds half of the day. A bored child is a dangerous child. Arrange for child care for six hours or so. The older children can help.

Instead of saying "no kids", try saying, "Adults Only". The children that participate in the ceremony can be scooted off to the babysitters with the rest after their job is done.

Answer 18

I did this at my wedding.  We were getting married on a paddle boat that cruised around the harbor. In the event a baby/child got cranky or sick their was no way for the parents to take them home.  I also have two children myself and I wanted them to be a major part of the wedding.  So having them as the only kids made them feel special.  I told my cousin who was in the bridal party a year and a half before the wedding date that there would be no children on board.  We fought with her until a week before the wedding when her dad finally called me.  I explained the situation and told him she knew for a year and a half.  Needless to say he understood and everything was wonderful.  I slipped a note inside of the invitations.  That had directions to the dock and said," no children please"  No one had a problem (except for my cousin).  It is your wedding and you should do what you want!  I know everyone will give me a thumbs down but I wanted to share my story with you.  Good luck hun