An old man, went to the doctor to get a physical.
A few days later, he was seen walking down the street with a gorgeous young woman on his arm.
A couple of days later, the doctor spoke to him and said, "You're really doing great, aren't you?"
He replied, "Just doing what you said, Doc: 'Get a hot mama and be cheerful.'"
The doctor said, "I didn't say that. I said, 'You've got a heart murmur; be careful
An old woman walks into a singles bar looking for a little action. A distinguished older gentleman approaches her and they really hit it off. After a few drinks they decide to get a hotel room and get it on. As they sit naked on the bed, the old man takes out his hearing aids and moves in. The old woman stops him and says, "before we do this, i should tell you i have acute angina." The old man looks at her, smiles and says, I sure hope so, cause you got a ugly ****."
An elderly couple were attending church services.
About halfway through she leans over and says:
"I just did a silent f**t, what do you think I should do?"
He replies:
"Put a new battery in your hearing aid
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