Once kids are old enough to stay home alone...?

Question

Once your kids are old enough to stay home alone, how do you deal with them not wanting to go anywhere? My twins are 13 (14 Oct 1st) and we allow them to stay home by themselves if we go to the store and things. They are responsible and do fine alone. The issue I am having is they never want to go anywhere now. Today my younger son had a birthday party to attend at a roller rink and so I decided we would all go and all the kids could skate. I have 4 boys, the twins (13), an 11 yr old and 8 yr old.

One of the twins didn't want to go. He didn't understand why I made him go. I like to do things as a family and I don't want them to become couch potatoes. There's no harm in them getting out and doing things. Anyway he came and got over it.

There have been other times when we have gone to the beach and they didn't "feel" like going but I have made them come. Each time they end up having fun anyway so I don't see the big deal. Does anyone else have this issue and do you make them go?

Answer 1

We just act like big goofy parents & ask her to come along because we want to spend family time together, before she's grown & gone.  

Like your kids, the teen almost always ends up having fun, anyway.  And, even if she doesn't have fun, at least she'll still have those memories of her parents being 'family time' goofballs.  (And, underneath it all, even when she's being a pouty teenager, I know that she still appreciates that kind of thing - even now)

Just come right out & say it - "I don't want you to be couch potatoes - get up - get moving - get out in the world!"  And, try as best you can to ignore the sullen moodiness until it passes over.  It will.  You know it will.

Answer 2

they're having raging hormones. lol

they don't "like" their family anymore.  Sorry to break it to you... ha ha

BUT it's okay to make them do things with the family. they may have a pout face on... tell them to make the best of it.  It's okay to let them stay home sometimes too, they like their "alone time"...

it's a teenage thing.  Make them go sometimes, other times let them stay home. BUT make it YOUR choice. so they stop arguing.

times it is okay, you can be like "we're all going to dinner, would you like to join us or stay home?"

or be like we are ALL leaving at (said time) for dinner we want you to come with us.  if they complain, tell them to knock it off or they're not going to ever have the privilege of staying home....   (remember its a privilege like video games and such, it can be taken away)

Answer 3

They're teenagers. They're not going to want to go anywhere until they're eighteen and old enough to go out clubbing.

My brother and sister (also twins) are exactly the same.  It's what teenagers do.

Just be grateful they're not out under age drinking and getting into trouble.

Answer 4

most stay home when my family goes out. It's that they don't get as excited when you go somewhere. Also when puberty rolls around some kids want to be left alone.

Answer 5

your older kids probably just dont wont to go out in public with their family cuz they are embrased or something

im around there age and i rathere go out just with my friends then my whole family

they probaly are just saying things like "i dont feel like it" cuz they dont wana make you feel bad.

there at the age that they just wana hang out with their friends alone with out parents so let them

just spend qulity time with them at home by doing a big project or making something

Answer 6

You have now allowed them to have the rights to stay home alone, and they just prefer that more than going with.

It's not a big deal. Just start saying things like 'if you stay home, you have to clean the kitchen' or 'do the dishes'.

They will probably want to start going with you then.

Good luck!