Only for stepparents or step kids please?

Question

do stepmoms automatically hate the stepkids, i dont know anyone who has a good relationship with stepparents my question is does anyone like their stepparents or stepkids and do you have any advice for getting a new stepmom for a 14 year old girl

Answer 1

No, they dont always hate their stepkids!  I love my wife's first daughter very much and consider her my own.  It truly depends on the person, and also on whether the child is willing to be open to that person.  My best advice is to go for someone who does not have their own kids already, and to find a VERY loving person.

Answer 2

well if you ask me im almost 15 years old and ive been living with my biological dad and step mom for 12 years now and i  its been absolutely awesome. my stepmom is the only person i feel i can rely on. my dad is there for me for lots of things but my stepmom is there for anything and everything i need. i dont even look at her as being my stepmom, from the first day on ive always called her mom.no matter what it is shes there to help me. she does anything and everything in her power to do all she can for me and my two brothers and does an awesome job it♥ we have the best relationship that i can think of and the sad part is, i know i wouldnt have a relationship like this with my biological mom. but honestly i think if she didnt want to be a stepmom and have kids, she wouldnt have married my dad:)

Answer 3

I was introduced to my stepmom when I was 7. I liked her, I guess. But then she had kids of her own and then I hated her! She always treated her kids better. Now that I'm older, I get along with her really well. But when I was 14, she was my biggest enemy. So I guess, what I'm saying is treat her like you would  treat your  own child.  

Answer 4

I am a step mom of an 8 yr old little girl.  I met her when she was 5, and she was 7 when she was in our wedding.  She actually wanted to call me Mom on her own.  She loves it here with us, and has never had any problems with me.  Luckily her Mother is nice and doesn't say mean things about me.

I think it works for us b/c I'm 24 and I don't have any of my own children yet, so she is my only one!

My parents too are divorced and have been since I was 8, but neither has ever remarried, so I don't know much about being a step kid, just a step mom.  I would give her a chance at least, as I bet she is nervous about you liking her.  A lot of step moms feel jealous at first b/c they have to share the attention of their spouse with their children.  

Give her a chance, and if you still don't like her or if she gives you a major reason not to like her, then it's settled, but she may become somewhat of a friend since she's not actually your Mom, and you wouldn't want to miss out on that.  

Answer 5

well no...they don't all hate their stepkids you just need to give her a chance and learn to know one another..i have a step mom but i'm 20 and she just came into my life not to long ago. just remember that if someone took the time to fall in love with your dad than she will take the time to get to know you although she will never replace your mom!

Answer 6

I have a great relationship with my two step children, although they call me by my first name, we all treat each other like a family because we are.  I would say to a new stepmother and stepdaughter take it slowly, learn to first respect each other, then be friendly, and then act as a family.  It's really not as daunting as you would think, just be casual and comfortable with it and you'll be fine.  Remember the stepmother must enforce the house rules, and she should be a part of defining the house rules, because it is her house as well.  However, the real punishment (i.e. who actually says "you're grounded") should come from the dad until the stepmother and stepdaughter are more comfortable with each other.

Answer 7

I am the (step) mother of three wonderful kids. I have 4 children of my own who live with my husband and I and his children live with us as well. He has had custody for 6 years of our 9 year marriage. (we were together 2 years before we were married). I love and adore my step children just as if they were my very own. And we all have a fantastic relationship together. And my children and them all get along and love each other just like they were blood siblings. We have a saying in our house that holds true for us. Its, "Blood is thicker than water, but love is thicker than blood". It is very possible to have good relationships within a blended family. I'm not saying it hasn't been hard at times because it has been, especially with a lot of problems their mom has tried to cause between them and me. But as they have gotten older they have seen that I am here for them no matter what. I tell them that God put spaces in my heart that were empty until I met their dad and they filled up the empty spaces.

I think that if you and you new step-mom try to respect each other and see each others point of view then you can have a very special relationship with her. Just try to remember, she is just a lady trying to get by in this world too. She has found love with your dad and if she makes him happy then its a good idea to try to see what he sees in her. You could come out getting a fantastic friend and confidant out of your relationship with her! Good luck!!  

Answer 8

my dad remarried and i got a new step-mom. I call her daughters my sisters and vice-versa. We all get along very well. I think i accepted her and her family into my heart so easily because she did the same with me and my lil brother.  We go on trips together, celebrate birthdays, holidays, the whole nine. From the start we could tell that she genuinely cared for my dad as well as his children.

Answer 9

I LOVE my stepdaughter! I really didn't get to know her till she was 12. But we made up for any time we didn't have before. I have three biological children too. She lives a couple thousand miles away now, to my dismay, but we talk for hours at least once a week! And she has given me the best gifts a child can bestow on parents....grandchildren!

Answer 10

I had a terrific relationship with my stepdaughters as a matter of fact I don't refer to them as that, they are my daughters. However, now they are teenagers and hate all adults. They both think neither their mother or myself know anything. I'm hoping it's just a phase.