Open Adoption -- Moving - Ohio Bill - Gershom?

Question

In a recent question regarding open adoptions, Gershom responded that Ohio has a bill in process that would enforce open adoptions which would mean Aparents can't move out of state . . .

My question is, if that bill goes through, what would happen if one of the parents had a job opportunity that would require them to move out of state -- would this bill prevent it? If so, aren't the ramifications a bit harsh?

Gershom -- I'm not "calling you out" on this one -- I put your name in the header to get your attention and invite your response on this. Please don't take offense.

Answer 1

As an adopted adult, I DO NOT agree with alot of the ramifications of open adoption. Once you adopt a baby/child, they are yours to raise, as if you had given birth to them. You are not babysitting them, they are your children. The birth parents give up the rights to that child. If the courts interfere and give the birth family too many rights then that is defeating the whole idea of adoption, isn't it?

  If an adult adoptee wants to find their birth family, with the birth family's permission, then, fine. Up until that time, I do not feel that the birth family has ANY rights to the child that they give up for adoption.

  Can we say s***w up the kid? I cannot see where involving the biological family while the adoptee is growing up, can be beneficial to the child. I would have found it very confusing.

  If we give rights to the birth family, this is going to have an affect on the adoption rates. I wouldn't want to raise a child, as my own, and have another family interfering. Think of it this way, do any of you appreciate meddling in-laws? Meddling birth families would be twice as bad.

  The whole idea of adoption is giving a child a chance that it otherwise wouldn't have and giving someone a chance to be a parent that they otherwise wouldn't have. Let's not consider adoption babysitting someones child while the birth parent has a life...........remember, the operative word here, is "child"

  Leave the adoptive parents alone, let them raise their children in the best possible way that they know how and let the biological parents step back and butt out.

  If you want to be involved in your childs life then find someway to keep them, do not give them up for adoption. If you want contact with them, wait until they are an adult and let the adoptee decide if they want contact with their biological family, it is more their choice than it is yours.

Answer 2

Thanks Laurie, i was just about to post that up!!

I guess in certain situations they'd be able to, like if both parties agreed. I also dont know how they can force visitation. For example a good friend of mine was having a really hard time visiting her daughter that she surrendered to adoption, it was an open adoption. The visits were "killing" her, and making it essentially impossible to function at home with the rest of her family. How could they "make" a parent visit? The courts can't force deadbeat dads to visit.

So I don't know, I just know what I read. I guess its going to be the "show me" state if it gets passed. ( which i really hope it doesn't, because alot of the bill is freakin bad in my opinion.)

I guess the parents would have to agree if one of them got a job in another state to end the contract. Or maybe the state would end it for them? Your guess is as good as mine in this cause AdoptionisAOK.

Something else to consider is what defines "open" to the state of Ohio? Is it weekly contact? updates via pictures/letters and visits maybe once or twice a year? The degree and level of openess according to some may NOT be impacted by a move from state to state.

My mom was promised an open adoption when she surrendered me in 1980. Promised it through the state. At that point she was promised annual updates on me and pictures. No visitation, no exchange of identifying information.

She called every 6 months for her update, and was denied it. She got one picture of me 12 years later, that was taken when I was 2. She got one update at that same time. I was afraid of airplanes. Thats it.

When I found her, she felt "blessed" just to have that "open adoption" She considered that open. Even beyond the lies, beyond the no contact, no  updates except one. My point being that the definition of open varies from person to person. I'm curious to see what Ohio defines it as.

Answer 3

It is almost impossible for anybody by agreement, contract, or state legislation to prevent a person from moving from one state to another. There are a series of US Supreme Court cases that address that issue.

You can on occasion obtain a court order to forbid taking a child out of the court's jurisdiction, but that is predicated on danger to the child and not convenience to the birth parent.

Answer 4

Here is the information regarding bill HB7, which address several adoption issues.  A new type of situation, called a "post-adoption contact agreement," would make the terms of the contract enforceable.  It does state that a court can terminate the agreement in certain situations.

Bill information regarding this matter:

"Currently, a birth parent and an adoptive parent can enter into a nonbinding open adoption.  Generally, an open adoption allows the birth parent to retain some degree of contact with his or her child after the prospective adoptive parent adopts the child.  This option is only available to those parents that have voluntarily placed their children for adoption.  Existing Ohio law does not allow a parent who has had his or her parental rights involuntarily terminated by the court, including in an abuse, neglect, or dependency case, to enter into a nonbinding open adoption.

The bill provides for an open adoption to be arranged by a "post-adoption contact agreement" rather than an "open adoption."  The major differences are that the post-adoption contact agreement is (1) extended to certain birth family members, (2) available to parents who have had their parental rights involuntarily terminated by a court, and (3) is enforceable.

The bill requires the agency to make a good faith attempt to locate an adoptive parent who is willing to enter into a post-adoption contact agreement with the birth family member in an involuntary adoption unless the child's foster caregiver is adopting the child.

In addition, the bill requires a probate court to approve the post-adoption contact agreement upon motion of the parties if the agreement is in the best interest of the child.  The bill also requires a probate court to enforce, modify, or terminate a post-adoption contact agreement under certain circumstances. "

Answer 5

I have had this same conversation and have no answer. I can see where this would cause problems for adoptive parents. I am a nmom and still can't in good conscience say that it is fair to keep a person from advancing in a career because they adopted a child. BUT I WILL SAY, if anyone knows or has insight to this question it will be gershom and a few of her associates here.

Answer 6

As a n-mom myself, I am uncertain of how fair this is.  I totally am for legal enforcement of open adoption, but its situations like what you mentioned (for both the n-mom and a-parents) that put this in a sticky situation.  I don't see how it is fair for either party to be denied advancement of any kind whether its a job or school.  Perhaps, some other ideas need to be worked out.  Make an arrangement that says that one or both parties would be able to leave state for whatever reason, but have an agreement worked out that would still honor the open adoption agreement, much like a divorce case.  A-parents and n-mom can work together to see what works best for them and then work it into some form of court order.  That is the only way I can see pass it.  Perhaps during holidays or summer, n-mom can go and visit or a-parents can bring the child back to where n-mom lives.  My daughter's a-parents live a distance away from me, but we keep contact via webcam and email.  We don't have any agreement because I did not want them to feel obligated to let me see her, so we are keeping one another's word and try to keep contact as best we can.  But on that same token, I also know that this contact can abruptly stop and I cherish every moment and milestone while I can.  She is finally saying "Ma-ma", and is slowly getting to "Da-da".  Breaks my heart to hear her call someone else mama, but to see her happy, healthy and in a wonderful environment keeps my heart at peace and keeps me confident that I had made the right decision.