Opening doors for women?

Question

I took a race gender & Sexuality class last year at U of M and we had to read an article by a feminist that complained that men degrade women by opening doors for them as well as buy/pay for things. Reason being is it's like the guy is saying that the women wouldn't be able to open the door without him or pay for it if it wasn't for him being there.

I am so against radical feminism like this. I just had to ask, are there people out there who really see this as being true?

Is there someone out there that really feels that women are so looked down upon and degraded in todays society that opening a door or paying for dinner is equivalent to calling them sexist names and not paying them equally in the workplace?

...Give me a break!!

Answer 1

I think men should be able to open the doors for women. I think it's polite. However, I think women should do the same for men if the require it. I think women should give up their seats to a man who has a pile of groceries in his arm. And I think men should do the same for women in similar situations.

Answer 2

Nobody sees evil faster than the evil doer.  People with malicious intent themselves assume malicious intent in others.  It would therefore stand to reason that someone who was raised with no good manners or courtesy would not recognize them for what they are.  I am never offended by anyone who treats me in a kind, courteous, respectful manner nor should anyone else be.

Answer 3

I love it when any one opens a door for me out in public because the door handles are filthy! Imagine the harmful bacteria concentrated on the handle? I use my side or wait for someone else to open the door.

I personally don't see this as a feminist issue it's a matter of preference. I hold doors for men, but it's with my leg or foot. I believe that radical feminists have more pressing issues to deal with...

Answer 4

It's not a matter of being sexist it is a matter of showing your manners on how to treat a lady.  My female friends love it when a man opens the door for them and I do to. For me I see it as manners from the ol' school days that men either has a problem with or don't know the rules... like walking on the outside on the sidewalk and let the lady walk on the inside a rule or safty and common sense, but guy these days have a problem with everything.

Answer 5

its also a matter of how your raised, i dont open a door for a lady, let them enter first, eat before everyones got their food at dinner etc, i can feel my mom biff me in the back of the head (even though she's not there)

most women actually find a bit of chivalry attractive, those that dont likely find themselves being called d**e and such more often then not ;)

Answer 6

I think it's nice when a guy holds the door open for women and pays the bill and stuff. Its just being a gentleman and being nice. it's fine for me =)) but i do think in return the women could do the same now and again

Answer 7

I don't mind if someone opens a door for me. I do the same for people, but I'm not waiting for a guy who does those things for me. The guy I love most, used to say that was not necessary to show love or respect, who loves you or respects you do more substantial things than open doors.

And I also open doors for persons, either women or men.

Answer 8

What the h**l.

Opening a door for someone is being polite.

Answer 9

She sounds like one of those really annoying chicks.

But personally I am very secure in my door opening skills so

I love it when a guy opens the door for me. and I think its nice when he pays for dinner. But I do feel bad if he pays for it all the time so I usually try to work out at lest a "he pays 2 then I pay 1" or somthing.

Answer 10

Keep it simple, open doors for ladies but let feminists open their own **** doors.

Answer 11

I call them simple acts of courtesy.  I only have a problem with these acts if it's expected, on either end.  Men who insist they must take care of women by opening the doors for them or buying them things as well as women who demand that men open doors for them as well as buy them thing, both annoy me to the core.  Courtesy should never be one-sided.

Answer 12

Do what you think is the right thing and let them take it as they may.  

I have taught my sons to open and hold doors for everybody and at times we barely make it into the store because my oldest son just cant bring himself to let the door close on anyone. lol  

One day a woman walked through the door ( which my son was still holding open for a gentleman with a walker) with her daughter and she actually yanked the door out of my sons hand and admonished him for being disrespectful to her and her daughter .  I was shocked, and the heartbreak and confusion on my sons face sickened me.   I decided to use this scenario to teach my sons how to handle ungrateful people while maintaining their dignity.

Since then, when my sons encounter such nasty people they politely say. "I intended no offense" and proudly walk away knowing that they have done nothing wrong other than trying to show respect and courtesy to a person who is  ungrateful.

Answer 13

I doubt there are many people that seriously think this. I would be very insulted if someone didn't open the door for me - it's just common courtesy to open the door for whoever is  behind you of if someone is carrying a bag and you aren't.

I think it's all how you interpret things. Like being paid for, some would see it as degrading, others  see it's as been treated (like a princess hehe!) and repsectful.

Answer 14

I don't care if you're a man, a woman or a dog, if you're in front of me, and you're not elderly (or incapable of holding the door open) and it slams into my face, I'm going to make a comment.

Not opening the door for another person is just plain RUDE! I'm not talking about waiting 2 minutes for the next person that you see to go through the door. I'm referring to the situations in which you're RIGHT behind someone, and the door slams in your face. It's disgusting.

Also, people who don't hold doors open for the elderly or those with disabilities sicken me. How dare you think that you're too good to hold the door open for 25 seconds?

I would hold the door open for a man if I were in front of him, and I expect the same common courtesy, feminist or not.

Answer 15

There's a putrid highly reject-able latent threat that goes with a man's expectation to "open doors" for women.  It's expressed here openly on this site frequently.  It goes like this:  If women refuse to let us "protect" them, open doors for them and refuse to "behave" like proper little dollies, men have a right to mistreat them, knock their teeth down their throats, let a door close on a female stranger in "punishment" for the "crimes" of hairy-legged feminazis.  Women are like REALLY fed up with that latent threat.  And, we aren't stupid.  We know FULL well that men have NO intentions of being TRULY "chivalrous" or they would be "chivalrous" and be outraged more about the rampant misogynist c**p women have to put up with in our societies than with cutsie latent threats and holding doors open, which we only really needed help with back when patriarchal male-entitlement expectations required that we cripple and deform ourselves to be "attractive" for male social sexual fetishes with body-damaging and weakening corsets.  I'd say give US a break, but, unfortunately, based on merely the fact and REALITY that a woman's chances of being beaten or murdered are greatest when she's pregnant, I would say I'd just be putting even more women in danger of the "chivalry" of crushed cranial and facial bones.

http://jovanmiles.net/wp-content/uploads...

http://www.flickr.com/photos/koreana/299...

Answer 16

I open doors for women, all of them. Yes, I know they can do it themselves.

I'd even open the door for some stupid, annoying, b*tch

Answer 17

I don't really care about the door thing. I've always opened the door for women when I could.The paying for everything gets kind of annoying but I do it anyway. It just feels like the right thing to do.

Answer 18

I love when a guy opens/closes a door for me or pays for dinner. It shows that chivalry is not dead!! I think maybe the person who wrote that article doe snot have anyone to open doors for her so her point of view is skewed. This is definitely not the same as women being called names or not getting equal pay. A man that can pay for dinner and show he is a gentlemen is awesome!! There are not many guys out there like that now a days!!!

Answer 19

I hardly think this stuff is tantamount to the systemic discrimination women have faced elsewhere. But when you do these things for a woman just by virtue of her gender, not for any other reason, it's still sexism, albeit in its most innocuous form. Why are women seen as more deserving of these concessions than men?

Answer 20

I think it's nice to hold a door open for anyone. I've held doors open for men before, it's just the nice thing to do. I don't think it's sexist at all. As long as the woman doesn't expect the man to hold doors open or pay for things I think it's fine.

Answer 21

It's not degrading. It's just courtesy. Honestly these people who think it is degrading must also think its degrading for a child to be helped with getting dressed even though most children are dressing themselves at 2 . It's not degrading. It's just being helpfull and nice.

And I do the same for others.