Opinion on cosleeping with 10 month old baby?

Question

I'm looking for opinions on cosleeping with our baby. Please no judgement calls from anyone on how cosleeping is not safe, etc. For the last month, our baby goes down at night and when she wakes up we just take her out of the crib and sleep with her. We have a futon mattress on the floor in her room, up against the wall. I or my husband, whoever has the "night shift" will lay down next to her and she sleeps SOUNDLY until the morning. Trust me, we have tried everything and being sleep deprived, this is what we have resorted to and it works great -we all get good sleep! But my question is, is it better to keep her in her own room on the mattress or would it be alright to bring her in bed with us? I thought that perhaps keeping her in her own room would keep her in her own environment but let's face it, the futon mattress isn't all too comfy for me or my hubby! She's great during the day with naps - sleeps in her crib fine, it's only at night. What would you do - her room or bring her in bed with you? P.S. - we never thought we would cosleep but again, this is something that we just started doing recently but with trying EVERYTHING and even having our pediatrician telling us she's out of ideas, this is what we resorted to and honestly, I LOVE IT! I love waking up next to her and hearing her every little breath during the night - it's such a wonderful sound. I'm just wondering if it's ok to bring her in bed or to keep her in her room to make the transition of her sleeping alone (eventually) easier since she'll still be in her own room. Opinions welcome, but again, please no judgement calls on cosleeping. Every parent has a choice to do their own thing and yes, there are concerns with cosleeping which is why we are VERY careful with it. Thank you to everyone!

Answer 1

I see nothing wrong with it.She is still under one years old.I found it works better that way when they are that small instead of keep getting up to check on them.I feel secure when they are laying right next to me. I've never been a fan of cribs.Both my girls slept with me until they were like one in a half.Then it was toddler beds.They were older no late night bottles lol.

Answer 2

my daughter is the same age and we are going through the same thing, were she would starting crying in the middle of the nite, so her daddy or i would go in her room and just rub her back until she falls back asleep but this was killing our backs so we started putting her in are bed, and guess what she has stopped crying in the middle of the nite. we all sleep very well, with no back pains and WE LOVE IT. so i say bring her to bed with you. when shes ready to sleep on her own she will

Answer 3

I used to co-sleep with my 1 year old (moving her with her father before the new bub comes in a month) and I miss it soo much, but like I stated I'll get a newborn soon.

My husband was afraid of hurting her while all of us slept together so he moved out of our bed into one of his own, and not she sleeps with him.

Honestly the US and a few other countries are the only ones who push for babies to sleep in a different room and claim it to be dangerous when in all reality, it's really not. How many thousands of years have people been co-sleeping? Since the human race began, so it can't be that dangerous if there are so many of us here today!

Answer 4

What works best for your family?

I don't think anyone here can tell you that, but I know that cosleeping has worked very well for our family.

Answer 5

Since your bed is more comfortable for you (since you sleep better there), let her sleep in your bed with you. Just make sure she can't roll/fall out, that nobody can crush her, yada yada, all the safety stuff. When you're ready to transition her back into her own room (maybe around one and a half years old), then you'll need to spend some time sleeping in her room with her to get her used to her room. But why sleep on that futon for a year or more now? Make that transition later, when you're almost ready to not sleep with her anymore at all.  Sleep in your bed. Then when you think she'll get through the night alone, sleep in her room with her (like you do now),then you transition her into your not being there (another step). It just takes lots of patience to help her through the transitions. For now, sleep where you sleep best and take her with you there (heaven knows you need to sleep with a 10 month old to care for!). Source: Mom of 2, coslept with both (one in our bed, one in his room with one of us in there, ie, we coslept both ways -- our bedroom and kid's bedroom...neither way is easier or harder later, it's just one more transition step if you take them into your bed to transition them back into their own room before transitioning them to you not sleeping with them anymore.  

Answer 6

My daughter will be 4 in November and has recently started coming in our room at night, after she uses the bathroom. Other then the fact that "3 is a crowd", what can you do? Have a restful nights sleep or listen to all that wailing. I vote for sleep.

Answer 7

"I LOVE IT! I love waking up next to her and hearing her every little breath during the night - it's such a wonderful sound."

You answered your own question, it is obviously the right decision.

That is the natural way for a baby to sleep - go ahead and take her to bed with you and her dad, you'd be doing all of you a huge favour.

Answer 8

Hi,

I think the most important thing to start with is to get your baby into a good sleep routine.  I had massive problems with getting my 4 month old son to sleep.  He would just lie awake and cry for hours, then when he finally went to sleep he would wake every hour or two hours through the night and cry again!  Talk about pulling our hair out .... we were absolutely desperate for sleep!

It was a baby sleep audio program recommended by a friend that finally saved us. We followed the advice and began by creating a baby sleep routine which included bathtime, dimming of the lights, putting James into his crib, final nappy change and then lullabies. We also made recommended changes to his naps during the day and used some of the other recommended techniques. Within two weeks he was sleeping through the night most nights with just the odd night where he would just wake once!

Definitely start by creating a good baby sleep routine though and you could find that solves most of your baby sleep problems.

Good luck!

If you want to take a look, the audio program is at http://www.babysleepsolution.com

Answer 9

I think it depends on the child. If she sleeps better with you, then by all means let her! When my son was born I bought the most beautiful crib, he never spent one night in it. I told my doctor about this and he said he was also a co-sleeper with his children. When we had his sister 2 1/2 years later he transitioned to his own bed just fine. Now she sleeps with us, and I am in no hurry to get her out. They have done studies that suggest co-sleeping is very beneficial to the health and well-being of the baby, mother, and father. I love waking up and being able to squeeze my babies first thing. If you feel safe and you are all sleeping better, then to heck with what people say.

Answer 10

Co-sleeping is absolutely wonderful and normal and bedsharing can be perfectly safe.

Here are some links on safe bedsharing and the biological norms of co-sleeping:

http://www.kathydettwyler.org/detsleepth...

http://www.drjaygordon.com/development/a...

http://mothering.com/articles/new_baby/s...

http://www.askdrsears.com/html/7/T071000...

Enjoy your babe and your sleep! My son is 16mo and the family bed has worked very well for us since birth.

Answer 11

my husband and think co-sleeping is great.  our son co-slept with us for 2.5 years and then he got his own bed and we began allowing him to learn to sleep on his own.  now he goes to sleep happily with no fuss because going to bed was always made fun for him.  

he still comes into our room in the middle of the night (he's now 3).  when we feel he is ready we will encourage him to stay in his own bed...no rush, he's only a child once.

so it worked for us, if you feel it is right for you then go for it.  it's certainly not for everyone, and everyone has a right to there opinion.

Answer 12

Us personally.. we are both used to sleeping with him in our bed, just as both of you are used to sleeping with your baby. I'd just bring her into bed with both of you. I've found though that during night feeds, my son tries to grab at my husband's face! LOL

Answer 13

Hey, I honestly think you should keep her in her own room. When she gets older you don't want her thinking she can sleep in your room all the time. You want to keep that YOUR space! haha

Plus knowing she can sleep in her own room will make it easier when she no longer needs you to sleep beside her.

Good luck! :)

Answer 14

I used to cosleep with baby starting around 4 1/2 mths until he was about 7 months and loved it too.  I'd do whatever works for you but what is safest too.  With a Mobile 10 mth old I'd be more afraid she'd get up and find a way off the bed.  Your futon option sounds safest but doesn't sound like it is too comfy for you.  Is there somewhere you can put a mattress against the wall (maybe instead of the futon)?  Also, if you want her to transition at some point to sleeping alone in her room, I'd recommend keeping her in there and not taking her to your room- they get used to that quick! GL