Our son is acting like a brat?

Question

Our son constantly wants to be carried, and also sleep in the bed with us. He is 15 months, could he be acting like this because we are expecting our 2nd son? He also doesnt like to walk, and is starting to hit when he dont get his way! Can someone give me some advice?

Answer 1

i have a 16 month old son who does the same thing wanting to be held all the time. when he comes to me i will hold him for a few minutes but if i'm busy i give him a firm no and if he has a fit i distract him and give him a toy or tell hiim to go find his cup. or tell him to go check on his baby (i have a 4 month old also) it seems to be very effective for me. as for the hitting my son just started that as well and telling me no. i tell him no and if he keeps doing it i hold his hand until he stops. if he starts up again then i sit him on the couch and eventually he gives up. as for sleeping in the bed i dont have advice except to give him a special toy and blanket do a bedtime routine like bath and story put him in his bed or crib kisses and leave the room. if he seems scared get him a night light. if he cries he's old enough to cry to sleep. when my son wakes up i go in there check on him and let him know i'm there and then leave. i do it every 5-10 minutes til he goes to sleep. hope any of this helps good luck

Answer 2

advice- duct tape.

good luck.

Answer 3

Relax fot Gods sake, hes just a baby.. Give me strength...

Answer 4

He defintely senses that soon he won't have all your full devoted attention. Put your foot down and be the parent authority. Show him who is boss and do not let him run over you. Once the new baby is born make sure you set aside some time for  just you and the first son. And have your husband (boyfriend) do the same with him.

Answer 5

He's only 15 months, he just wants to be around you and to know you'll give him attention. If he knows about the 2nd child I am sure thats why he maybe acting this way. Just relax and try to work through it.

Good Luck!

Answer 6

There's a balance that needs to happen, here.  You need to be a parent - calm, loving, attentive, and caring.  You also, as a parent, need to be firm, tough, and NOT give in.

Sleeping in your bed is a no-no.  I know a LOT of people who do it, but if it's not something you want to do for the rest of your life, put an end to it now.  NO exceptions.  Your child has his own bed for a reason, make him use it.  Unless you are an advocate of the "family bed" (which I am not) then you need to force him to sleep in his own bed/crib.  He won't cry ALL night, trust me.  Even if he does, he won't EVERY night.

As far as not liking to walk - why does he not like to walk?  Is he just not walking because he wants to be carried everywhere, or is he not walking because he doesn't want to go where you want him to go?  If he's not walking because he wants to be carried everywhere, do not do this.  Take his hand, and gently walk him over to where you want him to be.  If he's not walking because he doesn't want to go where you want him to go, then either take his hand and lead him there or pick him up and bring him there.  You're the parent, act like it!

As far as hitting goes, he needs to know now that hitting is NOT okay.  15 months is a tad young for time outs (typically starting between 18 and 20 months based on the maturity and intelligence of the child) but you can certainly get your point across.  If he hits you, you get to his level and look him in the face.  In a calm, but FIRM voice say "Hitting is NOT okay.  DO NOT hit mommy/daddy/Sarah/etc.  It hurts."  Then, place your child on the floor and walk away.  Do not pay further attention to your child while they are hitting you.  

(Note: Once your child begins to speak, have him apologize when he hits someone.)

Just a side note as well:  Welcoming a second baby into the family can be tough.  There needs to be a sort of balance here.  Obviously the infant is going to need more attention than his big brother, however, you need to be sure that your older boy gets the amount of attention he deserves.  Keep him as involved as possible with EVERYTHING about the baby.  He can help do things like hold bottles, dress him, wash him, etc.  Just be sure to guide him gently!  

Your child is at an age where this type of acting out is normal, and that's okay.  You just need to be firm, be parents, and help him work through this.  Do not try to be his friend, you are in charge.  If you let him think he's in charge, or that he even has a say or bartering room here, your life will be a living h**l.  Trust me.

Good luck, and congratulations on the baby!

Answer 7

It could be that he is acting out because of the new baby...First thing, do NOT let him sleep in your bed, be firm and consistant in his disepline...Don't treat him like a baby just because he is acting like one, if you do, he will think its okay for him to act that way and keep doing it...

Answer 8

It's normal that he wants to be held- it's part of his way of staying regulated/calm throughout the day.  It is also normal that he wants to sleep with you- he feels safest there.  You need to figure out how both children can feel safe and loved and be safe during bedtime- will the baby be in a co-sleeper?  Will your son move to a crib in your room?  Start the transition now if he will, so you can support him and let him know that you are there for him.  

The hitting is not acceptable, but at his age he doesn't automatically know this.  You must teach him.  Stop him, tell him no hitting and be firm.  You can take away your attention (put him down or walk away) if he is hitting or tantruming.  Do not give him more attention when he is being negative.  Start setting firm limits on hitting.

You may want to give him more time to prepare for transitions or things that are difficult and cause him to hit.  Give him ways to be successful.

Answer 9

relax, don't discipline him for this and make him feel bad. it will only make matters worse.

Stop talking about the new baby around him. He doesn't need to hear it. Focus on him, give him extra attention because thats what he needs right now

Answer 10

BINGO!

He's still a baby.

:)

Tell him how he is going to be a big brother and how big brothers should act. :) I'm sure he sleeps with you due to the mother. My daughter slept with me until she was 5! (i know i know..but i know someone who slept with their mom until she was 14 k lol)  Oh plus i was living at home with my parents at the time .lol

Answer 11

Welcome to the terrible twos.  It's a challange raising young ones.  Mine are driving me crazy.  I don't really have an answer, becuase mine are being the same way, and they are 11, (girl) and 4 and 8, (boys).  You are not alone.

Answer 12

Yes, I can give you advice.

If you do not like him sleeping in the bed with you, start putting in him in his own bed, even if you have to get up 20 times every night. Eventually he will get used to it and stop crying about it.

Also, stop carrying him so much. Let him throw his fits and do not give in. Take away his favorite toy if he is hitting you. Let him earn it back.

Answer 13

Stop being his friend and playmate and start being his parent.  You should have control over what this child does.  If you don't start to be the parent, you are really going to have major problems when he is older.

Answer 14

These answers are craziness!  He is 15 months old he does not understand that a baby is coming for goodness sake.  He wants to be in the bed with you because you allow him to be and its a warmer snugglier place than his crib.  He wants you to carry him because babies like to be carried and have attention.  He is acting just as a 15 month old should act.  When he hits you you need to firmly say no and hold his hands at his side for a minute.  Do this everytime he hits or before long you will have a 5 year old hitting you.  He is trying to figure out what type of behavior is acceptable.  So show him what is acceptable in a firm loving manner!

Answer 15

well your not alone alot of parents are going threw this but if you don't nip it in the but now it will only get worse once your baby comes along so first thing first

don't carry him make him walk if he crys and throws a fit than let him

and about sleeping with you guys don't let him and put him in his bed if he gets up than put him back and just continue doing it he will eventually give up

show him that you guys are the boss don't lose your temper and get stressed out they can feel that and they will feed off of it

and about the hitting tell him that it isn't OK and that it hurts you and just say like nice touches don't hit him back

hitting him back to show him its not OK to hit isn't right

just be contestant

and i hoped it helped

its ok to hold him for a few minutes and reward him once he does sleep in his bed incourage him to be a big boy

and when he is throwing a fit if he isnt going to harm himeself just ignore it than when he sees that he isnt going to get any attition from  it he will stop

Answer 16

I saw one remark about for God's sake hes a baby....yes and you also have a life and do you want 2 babies in bed with you???

Time to start setting the boundries. It's hard when you put them in bed and they cry to come out. Stick to your guns. Go back every 5 minutes and reassure him that he's okay. He'll be sleeping through the night in less than a week. If he's on the bottle time to get him off. 15 month old toddlers don't know jealousy yet, plus the baby isn't even her yet. How much time do you spend playing with yourson? do you often do things he likes. If hes demanding more of your attention, give it to him, he must need it.

Answer 17

This is normal behavior.  He has no idea what it means that you are having another baby, it has nothing to do with that.

Answer 18

He knows something is going on.  He is behaving normally.

Answer 19

dont worry.. i dont think there is anything to be worried about.

Answer 20

Let him cry. your parents did it to you and you came out just fine. It ain't easy but it'll save you stress for the next 15 years.

Answer 21

It is probably just a phase...if he dosent get over it soon dont let him near the newborn.

Answer 22

He is probably acting like that because ur pregnant..... you should watch the show supper nanny it really helps a lot

All you can do is be patience and try to let him understand that his behavior is wrong... but always show him love