Overly jealous and he doesn't trust me!

Question

ok i've been with my boyfriend for a year and 1/2. just lately he's become really jealous and he doesn't trust me at all!

like when i tell him that i'm going to hangout with my friends(who are guys) he tells me that he doesn't want me too see them.

every time that i ask him why he always says, "i've had girlfriends cheated on me before and i really don't want to loose you" or "its no that i don't trust you, i just don't trust them"

what really makes me mad is that i can't believe that he would think that i would ever do something like that. that he could think that low of me, like I'm some w***e who sleeps around.

Answer 1

My boyfriend does the same thing.. And i told him that they are just my friends and thats all they will ever be. and he tells me he doesnt want to lose me and i tell him he's not going to that i love him but he is still jealous. i stay with him but i told him he needs to stop being over controlling and im gonna hang out with who i want to. lol

Answer 2

Get rid of him. He is controlling and a bully. This will not get better, only worse. If he doesn't trust you it's because he is the one probably cheating. I'm sure you thought it was romantic and sweet that he was so in love with you that he wanted to be with you all the time and not out of his sight, now it is tiresome. In a short time, you will grow to hate him for it. Just end it now because if you don't have trust, you don't have anything.

Answer 3

You need to understand where your boyfriend is coming from. I can understand that it is extremely difficult for you, but if he means this much to you then you need to realise that he needs to put all his faith in you. This will take a long time as he has been betrayed but eventually he will trust you. Maybe you could ask him to hang out with you and your friends and make him feel like he is invited. Trust, as you probably know is a very big issue in all relationships and your boyfriend has been hurt. He is not looking down upon you, he is saying that he doesn't trust your friends. Are these new friends that your hanging out with and maybe that's why he is feeling insecure? I think you are reading him wrong and you also need to ask him exactly why he thinks you would cheat on him. Men can get a little jealous at times, and they need to feel that they are the centre of your world. Talk to him and things will sort themselves out. Good luck.

Answer 4

Look....guys know guys....and he's afraid that one of these guys is going to make a move on you that's all.....so you need to deside on what's important to you....your friends or relationship....because if it is a serious relationship then you need to make it work, because if you end up marrying this guy....well when you wake up & go to sleep it'll be him there....not your friends....so think about who you want to make happy....him & you...or you & your friends....you pick.

Answer 5

Listen to what I say and listen good:

This guy is a total LOSER who is nowhere in life with nothing going for himself in life and has no direction in his life. He has no desire to better himself just the desire to destroy acceptable women who are everywhere in life with everything going for themselves and has every opportunity to go any positive direction and change any negative direction to positive ones down the drain.

Loser men always look for women who have the status they themselves want for themselves because the thrill of it is to destroy them totally.

Trust me, I know exactly what I'm talking about and I've seen guys just like this and how nasty and vile they really are in public so I'm telling you to dump him now before you do something stupid like live with him, or worse marry him and have children with him.

He says he has had girlfriends that cheated on him? Well most likely they just dump him and he just didn't except it, didn't get the message they are no more and just didn't want to except it so in his self absorbed mind they cheated on him even though they long dumped him.

Here are some very serious links you should really read and don't even show this to that creep!

http://media.www.easttennessean.com/medi...

http://www.ojar.com/view_22624.htm

http://relationships.blog-city.com/attra...

http://www.associatedcontent.com/article...

http://www.mental-health-matters.com/art...

http://www.helium.com/items/577921-under...

http://www.ehow.com/how_2093406_tell-boy...

http://counsellingsource.com/ask-the-psy...

http://www.justrage.com/article.php/2008...

http://www.accessmylibrary.com/coms2/sum...

Answer 6

That is really scary sounding. I don't think you should stick around him at all - I know it's been a long relationship, but there are some times when you just have to let it go. It creeps me out that he's assuming all guys will rape a girl just because she hangs out with them, or that a girl will sleep with guys just because she hangs out with them. Those are all the classic signs of an abusive guy, and while he isn't hitting you, do you really want to deal with this kind of behavior? Do you want to stay with a guy that's assuming you're gonna cheat on him?

Answer 7

My boyfriend is kind of the same way. Jealousy is the fear of losing someone or something. One thing that I have done to not make my boyfriend not so jealous is that I give him a validation. Have a real conversation on how serious you two really want to be. See what happends and ask him how you can make it so he's not so jealous all the time.

He can have a point though on not trusting your guy friends though. I've had a few guy friends that were really good friends and then when my boyfriend wasn't around they started to hit on me. Which made me feel like I was putting my boyfriend down for getting myself in to a situation like that. So I guess there can be a good scenario and a bad scenario. He's probably afraid of the bad scenario and doesn't want you to end up in a situation like that. Look at the situation from his point of view. Just imagine that if he wanted to go out with some chicks that were good friends and you didn't trust them.