PLEASE--I want your opinions!!!

Question

I have posted this over and over the past few weeks in various categories with no response. Please, someone give me honest input. Thank you!!

Okay, please tell me if any of you have ever felt this way. I am dating an Amazing guy. In fact, I know I'm going to marry this guy some day. But he has had past girlfriends and I have had no past boyfriends. So I ask him about his girlfriends all the time. I am always concerned if I'm as cute as them, as skinny as them, have a better body than them, if I'm as good as them sexually, etc. Plus, we were friends before we started dating, so we've discussed what he finds to be hot and s**y. Everything he pointed out that he loves, is the total opposite of me. Example, he said he loves goth girls, asian girls, small b***s, skinny girls, girls with pink hair, girls that are all bubbly and have a bouncy attitude, etc. Well, I am None of that. So, I wonder, how can he find all of That attractive AND me? Plus, if he Still happens to find all of that attractive, I tend to get jealous everytime we pass an Asian or goth girl, etc. Am I just being stupid or do all people go through this? I want to change myself for him, but he tells me he loves me the way I am. But how can he love me for who I am And love all of that at the same time? I love him and Only him, and he is the only man in my eyes... he claims it's the same for him, but I'm having trust issues and I DONT want to ruin this relationship... I just don't feel I can please him if I'm not his fantasy girl. I'm so afraid that I'll never be enough for him and some day down the road he'll find someone who IS all of that and leave me.

Answer 1

The most unattractive thing a woman or man can be is having no confidence in themselves. You are showing this lack of confidence now. Why? Be yourself, rejoice that you are who you are, no one can be you, be loving and kind at all times and let you light shine.Only you need to believe are worthy of this love your guy is showing you, so believe and be happy with the attitude of gratitude.  

Answer 2

I sort of went threw that with my husband. I'd always think he like his ex better cuz they was taller or could afford sexier clothing...I have two babies so you know where my cash goes.

But he told me he love me for me, and I did not believe him till he ate me out and had my kids. And always give me massage and cook for me. Runs my bath water and help me get the tangles out my hair after I shower.

In other words action speak louder then words and if he is bending over back words for you. And don't even second look them girls just glance 'which is normal' not stare then you have nothing to worry bout. And if he bends over back words then of course he loves you.

Hope This Help :-)

Answer 3

Let it go, let it all go.  If he has never done anything to make you not trust him and his love for you, let it go!!!  Don't let your insecurities get the best of you.  While he may be attracted to a certain type of girl, doesn't mean he doesn't love you.  It may be these types of girls are more of a fantasy, or an ideal for him.  Again, it doesn't mean he doesn't truly love or value you.

BTW, leave his past alone.  Who he dated before you is no longer relevant, and it just makes you appear all the more insecure when your constantly ask him about it.  Have confidence in yourself and in your relationship.  Know that he is there with you, for you.  And don't ever try and change for him b/c you think that is what he wants.  Be yourself, that's who he fell in love with in the first place, right?  

Good Luck!

Answer 4

Don't sweat someone like that.

If he don't want you, then move along to the next trick.

As usher said: "Ima be alright tonight."

Answer 5

Hunny many girls go through what you are going through.. I'm 17 years old but i have been in many long relationships.. you can take or ignore my advice.. I'm not one to force my opinion... but what this guys sees in you is pure beauty he has his likes and dis likes... but look at it this way.. he is with you now.. jealousy is a natural thing.. I'm the first person to know that.. but if this guys is really great like you say he is. then you should know he would never hurt you or want to. when a guy says he loves you most of the time the guy is more in love with you then your are him... you need to trust him and his actions until he give you reason not to... you seem like an intelligent and beautiful girl. which is probably why this guy loves you. just take it in and live in the moment..  

Answer 6

Yeah, I think everyone basically goes through this. And everyone else is right, being insecure isn't a turn on. And concentrating on his past always makes you both feel worse. So, just pay attention to the fact that he's with you now. He obviously thought you were different, and and thought you were good enough. And yeah, it's the little things, the actions he does, that you should concentrate on, because it'll make you feel better.

I always only paid attention to my boyfriends past, until I started to notice all the little adorable things he does for me, and now I'm secure in the relationship and I know he really does love me.

It'll make things better, I promise. (: