PLEASE answer I need help..Is my friend anorexic or seeking attention?

Question

I'm calling her *Abby*

Over a year ago Abby went through a period of time she lived on fruit for a quite a few weeks. I spoke to her in private and said i was worried about her and things but she says she was fine and eating healthily. Little did i know that all my friends at one point had told her that they were a little worried. However she soon started eating normally again and her gaunt face returned to its normal healthy full glow.

However, recently she has been eating barely anything at school (i know its the holidays but this will make sense in a minute), she has just been eating crackers for lunch .. two crackers with no spread and sometimes she has one small roll with butter. Our 'group' if it were is quite big (so we didn't want to seem daunting) but when there were days when all she lived on was water at school we would all say something like 'Abby you should go and get some food with (lets say Emily) cause shes going through later..we have house sport later and we want one of our good runners to have her energy!" But she ate nothing. At first we were subtle but we got more worried so she realized we were very concerned.

HOWEVER. After weeks of living on no more then water and one or two crackers at school Abby still hadn't lost any weight. She was talking about food more and more and picking up people's chocolate bars and going 'oh yeah these are nice' then putting them back down. If she was offered some, she refused. In my private opinion i think she has put on weight, but i think she looks amazing for it.

So i dont get her behavior? If i call her up she'll first talk about what she had to eat or if she was 'naughty' and ate 'fattening' things.

I need help. I am worried about her behavior..

Sorry it was so long......I am concerned you see. x♥x

Answer 1

she probably does have a eating disorder..she is just probably confused at the time about her weight..maybe u shud have another chat with her n tell her how u feel and how her other friends feel about her and then maybe she will come around but just keep watching her and somtimes u shud ask her like wat did she eat at home for dinner  

Answer 2

I think you should be concerned too. I know I would be.  She might have an eating disorder.  But it's hard to tell since you said she looks the same.  Maybe at school she does it for attention but she eats normally at home.  And it sounds like you and your friends are nice to her. Not just telling her to eat but saying it in a nice way.  

Answer 3

She wants attention. She has obviously been eating at home, and she just wants you guys to feel sorry for her. Pay no attention to her eating habits and she will stop.

Answer 4

Tell her to get off her abnormal diet and start eating! More specifically eat food that will reestablish her weight again, such as spaghetti, whole grain,  rice, fish, nuts, eggs, and even fruit and vegetables.

Answer 5

It sounds as if she is anorexic for attention.

Answer 6

Loz,

It does sound like she has some food problems. It's hard being a friend when you aren't sure about the right thing to do. People who are anorexic tend to be very secretive and will hardly ever say anything. They are excellent at hiding it. People who are bulimic are more open and will share the problem with those they trust.

It doesn't sound like she's anorexic or bulimic, but maybe you should be concerned for her. Keep looking out for her and see how it goes. It sounds like she's worried about size and self-image. Most people are these days. Maybe she's okay and maybe she isn't. You'll just have to look out for her and be there if she asks for you.

Answer 7

It sounds like she suffers from an eating disorder.  You should probably encourage her to research the effects of starvation diets such as these.  The body uses fat for energy.  In times of scarcity of food (which her body would think it was in because she has no food intake) it burns muscle to stay alive and retains the fat, so that when food is located the energy to gather and prepare it will be present, in the body fat.  So by starving herself she is causing her body to create more fat and less muscle.  If she persists in that behavior perhaps let her parents know or encourage her to see a therapist.

Answer 8

well, at school i don't eat much either because i don't really trust the school food.  but when i get home i PIG OUT.  school food isn't really my favorite, all the grease makes me sick.

but, i do eat a little bit more than your friend.  

i think you should talk to your friend about this and show her that you truly are really concerned about her diet.  especially since she's always comparing thighs and such.

try to make her eat things and tell her if it's the school food that is grossing her out or something then she should bring food to eat, because that's why i do now.

Answer 9

It does sound like your friend has an eating disorder of some kind, maybe anorexia & bulimia. She will be extremely secretive about her behavior and avoid talking about it as much as possible.

You are in a difficult position as you know something is wrong but she is not going to admit it. She will be feeling guilty, shameful, worthless to name but a few of the feelings, so by admitting to the ED she is also admitting to the other problems.

ED's are never about food, it's the outlet of the cause to the problem.

I think the best way maybe to help your friend would be to talk to her about how you would not judge her, feel disgusted by her behavior and you would be there to help and support her. ED's are not chosen, it is an illness and the sooner she gets help the better the results.

Perhaps suggest you go to her GP with her to take things further, the GP will then refer her to a clinical psychologist, along with medication she should want to get better.

Good luck, she is lucky to have a good, caring friend like yourself, please don't give up on her :)

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